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and then, at the last possible second, skips manly down to zanzibar and giggles at the hilarious death of the producer
and then lots of little grunts and food guys come and stoot and eat the dead bodies
It was a cold day near the southern base in Blood Gulch. Cortana and I were relaxing over a game of Go Fish, WHEN OUT OF NO WHERE 700 BANSHEES CAME FLYING IN!!! I GRABED MY SPARTAN LASER AND LET HELL REIGN DOWN UPON THEM. I HOPPED IN THE NEAREST WARTHOG AND TOLD CORTANA TO GET IN.
Then Mister Chief wonders why everyone is confusing him with Master Chief...Mabye they thought he was making a typo? Not so... Mister Chief never makes typos...Mister Chief proceeds to play some Led Zeppelin in his helmet instead of paying attention at this pointless staff meeting...It doesn't matter... they'll all be dead soon anyway.
And Led Zeppelin comes bustin through the walls in a hug fiery explosion, and ask "which one of you is Mister cheif?"
But it's too late because the Flood enter and impant everyone while the Chief is rocking out.
But, Jimmy Buffet appears from the residing gloom and busts out with "Bye Bye Miss American Pie" and, in doing so, destroys all of the flood with his badass lyrics.
then master chief starts running for no damn reason
"My knee is bleeding, can I have a bandaid?" "Today its your knee, and in 10 years it'll be your wrists, why are you making this my problem?" Do this again and I'll brand your ass with the banning prod
Then monkeys appear out of thin air, and they have Wings!!11!one, then they start shooting everything and everybody with their super duper galaxy destroyer plasma rifles.
and in the background some chick is screaming about how she's melting(i guess she means her mascara is running or something)
You've got to think crazy, of course, because you only get innovation by refining insanity. - Jason Jones
And then chief finds a pair of red slippers, puts them on and is suddenly transported to kansas, where he encounters two scarabs, a prophet and ron artest beating up some grunts.
while steven lynch sings about "if I were -blam!-, we'd swim in romance...."
Then Jimmy Hendrix comes and repairs the flood.
Then the Flood start rampaging and infect all the remaining Covenant.
all of a suden captain keys comes in with a magnum riding on a giant mutant panda
and after the panda got pissed off and ate captain keys, the panda washed him down with a bottle of Jack then started the training to be a mutant ninja panda so he can take out the turtles(spelling)[Edited on 11/24/2004 5:27:55 AM]
but the panda gets mad because of the lack of Disco fever, and bucks keys off and deficates on him
The defication is actually gold which the covenant then use to buy the world.
The newly found riches of the covenant buy them master chief's loyalty...OMG earth is doomed!!!!
sargeant Johnson gives the chief a few 'choice' words and then a chorus of marines go 'oooohh rahhh!!' and the chief changes his mind and continue to kick covie ass.