- last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT
THE QUIZ
What time do you typically log on?> 4pm (3)
> 7pm (1)
> 10pm (2)
> 12am (5)
> 2am (8)
You’re in the pre-game lobby, you say :> “Sup -blam!-es?!?!” (4)
> “Raaaaaaaaaaaaaa--” (8)
> “How’s it goin’, fellas?” (1)
> Nothing. (5)
> “Quick, everyone hit Y to check out my rank!” (6)
The party leader asks you what you want to play, you say :
> "I don't give a -blam!-, just start the game already!" (4)
> "I'm only a 47 in Double Team, let's play that." (6)
> "Doesn't matter, I'll play whatever." (1)
> "Team Training!" (8)
> "I played with your mom last night." (2)
You're in step four with the ten second countdown, you say :
> "Why is it taking so long?" (5)
> "Alright guys, no worries. I'm host." (7)
> "Mom! More hot pockets." (3)
> "It's already game over." (2)
> "It's ok, I have auto-aim for the old maps too." (6)
You hate Waterworks, but it comes up in matchmaking, you :
> Quit. (1)
> Quit, but not before killing a teammate or two. (3)
> Try to convince your team to stay by telling them that their pistols fire tank rounds. (6)
> Follow the one teammate that stays whispering to them your affection for their mom. (4)
> Kill the norb in front of you to get the banshee so you can fly off to grab the rockets and sniper. (8)
You love Zanzibar, and it comes up in matchmaking, you :
> Start to drool and become cross eyed. (3)
> Lag out three opponents and spawn kill the last one that's left. (7)
> Find another reason to complain and yell at your teammates. (4)
> Give your team a strategy and encourage them to work together. (1)
> Go into deep concentration, ignore your teammates, and get angry when you die. (5)
The game starts and everyone spawns, your first attempt is to :
> Open Zone Alarm Pro. (7)
> Betray your teammate and take his weapon. (4)
> Steal your friend's kill and rub it in his face. (5)
> Change your handicap to severe and grenade yourself repetitively. (3)
> Pickup the "noob combo." (8)
You get killed when someone blows the fusion cores by the sniper rifle on Lockout, you say :
> “You n00b! That’s such a n00b thing to do. I’ll 1v1 you!” (8)
> “That is lame, man. I’m gonna go pop my collar and hang out at the nearest 7-eleven.” (2)
> “That’s such BS man I’m gonna ream you so hard.” (4)
> “lawl” (1)
> “ZOMG he just killed me without shooting me, you modding son of a -blam!-, throw down. I will punch you in the throat.” (5)
Someone snags the rockets then gets in the banshee on Ascension, you :
> Equate him or her to a female dog every time you’re within earshot. (8)
> Fire your pistol at him… he dies. (6)
> Wear it down with SMGs. (1)
> Wait until his banshee’s pointing down, when suddenly everything fades to blue... for them. (7)
> Quote Top Gun. (2)
You get in a Warthog and a gunner hops on, you :
> Wait until the gunner gets out and then find the quickest route off the map. (3)
> Go to the middle of the map to get as many kills as possible… in an objective gametype. (8)
> Fly, fly away. (6)
> Quote Need for Speed. (2)
> Park outside their base entrance and hit the magic button. (7)
You get stuck, you say :
> “That was sweet.” (1)
> “That is so BS man I know you’re hackin and I’m gonna hunt you down.” (5)
> “OMG HOST” (6)
> “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE” (3)
> “Haha my sis — er, girlfriend thinks that was cool.” (2)
You stick someone, you say :
> “Oh snap, that’s going in the montage!” (8)
> "That was nothing, you should see me when I’m sober” (2)
> “Oh man that was from on top of the map too!” (6)
> “Haha maybe if you were moving it’d be harder!” (7)
> “Oh dude I stuck you so hard in the –blam!-” (4)
After you return from the blue screen to find out that you were assassinated, you say :
> "OMFG! WTF! I'm gonna kill you!" (4)
> "Wow, never saw that coming." (5)
> "I knew he was right behind me." (1)
> "That's impossible, I pressed it way before he started shooting me." (7)
> "So that's how you want to play, two can play that game." (8)
The game is over, you won. You say :
> “Don’t bother; we’ll just delete the feedback anyways.” (7)
> “-blam!- you! You –blam!-ing –blam!-ers! I will shove my –blam!-ing- blam!- in your –blam!-” (4)
> You sing We are the Champions . (8)
> “Good game.” (1)
> “They can take away my Xbox, but they’ll never take… MY STAAAAAATS!” (3)
You are banned from matchmaking for cheating, you :
> Play split screen with yourself until the ban is up so that your parents don’t catch on. (3)
> Email Bungie a poorly-written legal threat. (6)
> Swear vengeance upon Bungie but only get so far as sending Shishka hate-mail. (5)
> Set off to find another 2 month. (7)
> Try to PM Frankie because you’ve been telling everyone how tight you two are for so long that you’ve forgotten it’s all a sham. (2)
Now, you should have added up all fifteen numbers as you went along. Divide that number by 15 and round to the nearest whole number. It should be 1-8, if it’s not, you fail at the maths. Compare your score to the key, the number you have is the gamer you are.
Here’s the key:
1. Average Dudeguy
2. Captain Coolguy
3. Ballus Non-Dropus
4. The Angry Psycho
5. The Aggro
6. The Modder
7. Host Hax ‘R Us
8. The Faux ProSubject to Change
[Edited on 07.05.2007 12:54 PM PDT]