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Subject: Stupid/funny/idiotic incidents you have witnessed.
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Posted by: monkeyblender
Funniest moment ever: in 8th grade, my friends and i switched my best friend's water bottle with a water bottle full of toilet water that had had a dump floating in it. He ended up drinking the whole thing! you should have seen the look on his face when we told him what was in his water!


That's sick, you could have killed him.

  • 12.01.2004 7:30 PM PDT

Devil is Double is Deuce and Joker always trumps Deuce.

Read this e-mail I got. They're all true stories: NOTE: I am not the author of this e-mail.

I have been a Travel Agent for thirty Years.

I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.

I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information, and then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts." Without trying to make her look like the stupid one, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa." Her response (click).

A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that is not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map, and Florida is a very thin state!"

I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No." She said, "But they look so close on the map."

An aide for a Bush cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between the gates to save time."

An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20 a.m. and got into Chicago at 8:33 a.m. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she could not understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went very fast, and she bought that!

A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think that is very rude?" After putting her on hold for a minute while I 'looked into it' (I was actually laughing) I came back and explained the city code for Fresno, CA is (FAT), and that the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?"

I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on them."

A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, FL. Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?" I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola, FL on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever!"

A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I
told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!"

A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York." The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, the agent said,
"Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the lady. After some searching, the agent came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've
looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere." The lady retorted, "Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" "That's it! I knew it was a big animal," she said.

  • 12.01.2004 7:41 PM PDT
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wow, if that's all true then i fear for our country's future.

  • 12.01.2004 7:53 PM PDT
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One night at our basketball game, we always run out well one of my friends ahead of me ran up the stairs out on the court. But he didnt make it...trips on the stairs and down he went funny as hell.

  • 12.01.2004 7:57 PM PDT
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im in fear for my life dear god can we burn all the stupid or turn the good looking ones into sex slaves and the bad ones into janitors

  • 12.01.2004 7:59 PM PDT
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That was a joke? You kinda lost me after like the third sentence.

  • 12.01.2004 8:06 PM PDT
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i'm not here to -blam!- about Halo2 so down get your pannies in a bundle.

  • 12.01.2004 8:08 PM PDT
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read the rules no double posting go away now and dont come back till you read

  • 12.01.2004 8:09 PM PDT

Devil is Double is Deuce and Joker always trumps Deuce.

Posted by: fantum
i'm not here to -blam!- about Halo2 so down get your pannies in a bundle.


Are you talkin' to me? <looks around> You must be. There's no one else here....

  • 12.01.2004 8:10 PM PDT
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Well it was just a blonde moment, but a few years ago my friend Stephanie and I were researching population control and she acidentally typed in "birth control". The two are related, but we were like 13 and found it hilarious.

  • 12.01.2004 8:33 PM PDT
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Ahhhh...Florida, the Stupid State. If you need proof of that, just remember all those recounts we had to have, it was ridiculous. One of my friends, Brandi, rides my bus. Well one day we were on there just talking, and all of a sudden, when we came to a stop, she yelled "Look!! A rabbit!! Holy crap!" well, it turns out she meant the stop sign on the side of the bus, and she was dead serious. That and one time a guy on my bus asked, "what is that shampoo that comes in the white bottle?" Brandi, yet again, answered "Selsun Blue!!" It was hilarious. We still make fun of her.

  • 12.02.2004 5:58 AM PDT
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Wow, if our country is being run by those people, we are doomed.

  • 12.02.2004 5:22 PM PDT
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At my high school...my biology teacher was asking people wat they did during break..and one guy said he went to Florida...and then this girl turns around and says "Isnt Florida closed because of the hurricanes"....may i remind u that this happened 2 days ago...I couldnt stop laughing

  • 12.02.2004 6:22 PM PDT

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