- SS_Zag1
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- Exalted Mythic Member
Sandswept Studios Design Director
Visit us and check out our games at Sandswept.net!
~~Pardon Our Dust.~~
Moderators Vs. Members Humpday Challenge (Group 1)
[Group 2 Writeup can be found here, written by B.B]
First rule; in this write-up, there is no such thing as a cheap shot.
The Bungie.net members and moderators gathered in a custom game lobby. Beginning as casual, fun and heart-felt friendship, slowly dissolved into trash-talking, corpse-humping, and all manners of unsportsman-like conduct. From the moderators, that is. The Bungie.net members were well-behaved and honest in their conduct with their fellow man. And, of course, the Members Team controller's weren't working all the way.
The Vicious, Trash-talking, Corpse-violating Bungie.net Moderators
Achilles1108 – Trash-talking Ringleader
Evilcam – Wielding +5 Assault Rifle of Killing
Just Another Fan – Too busy thinking about how cool the film is going to look afterwards
Ash55 - Natural Immunity to Banshee Bombs
Chris547 - Didn't really say a word, but I'm sure he was thinking angry thoughts
Sir Fragula - Wishes he was actually a moderator
The Polite, Gentle, Sportsman-like Bungie.net Members
El Roboto - Had his crouch button stuck
SS Zag1 – Left Trigger = Only working button
CAVX – Hold RB to pilot Wraith, other buttons don’t work too well.
AblativeMeatshield - Broken right trigger
Muffin Man 1 - Suffers from gender confusion. Distracting female death voice.
Gnome13* - Press A to Leave Game
SS Zero Divide* - Temporary Salvation. His controller seemed to work.
*Swapped on last game
Game 1
Team Slayer on Valhalla
Tone of Game: "Guys.. We're playing the moderators! Why are we tied!?
“All right, we can take these guys. They spend more time on the forums than they do on this game, that’s for sure.” Define ‘Putting your foot in your mouth’. After I missed the first shot with the sniper rifle, I knew this game wasn’t going to be pretty. Perhaps it was because of the Member Team’s overconfidence, or the Moderators stunning ability to NOT DIE, that led to such a result. Most notably, Chris lept like a flying squirrel from his perch, landed squarely on our Wraith, and punched the living –blam!- out of Roboto and myself. So much for armored tank.
What started as an epic struggle, soon turned into a violent game of hot potato. Until now, I have never complained about the audio in Halo 3. “Tied the Leader” and “Gained the Lead” is still echoing through my ears, along with the girlish squeals of the Members, as the Moderators came pouring over the hill tops like hillbillies with battle rifles. The only memorable moment for me is very near the end, where I landed a sticky grenade on Sir Fragula’s banshee whilst flying off the mancannon. Was that moment worth the pain and torture of fighting an unexpectedly difficult enemy? No, not really.
Final Score: 50-49 Moderators Win
Link to Video
Game 2
1-Flag CTF on The Pit
Tone of Game: "Somebody pick up the freaking rockets! .. Where’d our flag go!?"
As if the moderators had been taking skill pills between now and the last Mods Vs. Members humpday challenge, (or perhaps it was the lack of Stosh?) the member team was gritting their teeth and fighting an enemy which could not be easily suppressed. The first time the Moderators grabbed the flag, they sprinted back to their base without taking a shot. I followed in hot pursuit, only to run into a wall of blue. The rest was very vague, blurry, and ended with part of me pasted on the walls, and the rest of me on the cold stone floor of the rocket hallway.
Speaking of the rockets, obtaining such a weapon seemed impossible for our team. Whenever we checked for it, it was either gone, or in the hands of the enemy, who subsequently blew us away. El Roboto managed to get his hands on the sword, and proceeded to crouch-walk around the sword room for about 30 minutes. After much tribulation, the Members did manage to take the flag with a spectacular triple kill and manly growls. We trudged back to our base, using each other as meatshields, until we finally were felled by a lone grenade. El Roboto saved the flag and hopped down to the capture point.
Did we win? No. The moderators pulled it right out from under us, once again, escaped without a trace, and laughed the whole way. Our only salvation was when one of us managed to get their armor snagged on the cloth of the flag, and somehow it was carried to our base. Again, with El Roboto pulling the flag out of his dead comrade’s hands and carrying the team to victory. Err, to a tie.
Final Score: 2 - 2, Tie
Link to Video
Game 3
One Bomb on Last Resort
Tone of Game: “Bomb Armed. Bomb Reset."
Despite CAVX's lack of peripheral vision and use of motion tracker while inside bubble shields, the Bungie.net members did, in fact, win this game. It wasn't pretty, it really didn't end with us retaining much dignity, but it was a win, and we clung on to it for dear life. Which, ironically, the Mods were happy to take from us time and time again. If it weren’t for the constant hilarity of CAVX’s ability to sit inside a bubble shield with the enemy, both of who did not see each other for a full 5 seconds, this game would have been one of the worst victories of my entire life.
The highlight real of this match was when we actually managed to detonate the enemy bomb. My entire team rushed in without me, pushing their way through the closed gate with 50. caliber chaingun and guns blazing. From my perspective, it was a spectacular assault, nicely executed and carnage abound. When I finally arrived, I realized I was the only remaining survivor, and I had to hold the bomb for another 8 seconds. Needless to say, I died. However, we did manage to detonate it, with about 3 players of the enemy team standing right on top of it.
Final Score: 1-0 Members win.
Link to Video
Game 4: The Tiebreaker
Team Slayer, Narrows
Tone of Game: "Oh, we're so gonna win this! Wait, we're tied again?!"
With a tie just not being good enough, I begged and pleaded (ok, it was pretty mutual between all of us) Muffin Man to let us play one more round, to really separate the (old) men from the boys. Apparently, I’m still a boy. A small, infant child.
In this game, SS Zero Divide took the place of Gnome13, who had to quit. What started as a promising comeback, ended as a snowballing defeat. This wasn’t really a regular snowball, rolling down a powder-filled slope. It was more of a ball-shaped piece of solid ice, going down a 90 degree incline covered in Crisco and bacon grease. We were winning, and somehow 40 of us managed to die in the next 4 minutes, without getting more than a few kills and some tears running down the cheeks.
The most memorable moment in this game (for me) was when I got pushed into a corner by blue team, and each one of them walked by with the butt of their gun and pistol-whipped me violently across the face until I respawned. I distinctly recall Achilles spew something along the lines of "Man, I really enjoy [violating] that kid!" No kidding. The man’s a pervert. [Correction: After looking back through the footage, JaF has informed me that he said: "I took great pleasure in us gang raping that boy"]
Now, contrary to popular belief, and the picture shown above, I did not jump into the middle of the entire enemy team, feeding them the final, most important kill of the game. I only saw 5 of them. It wasn't the entire team.
Final Score: 50-48 Moderators Win
Link to Video
Conclusion: The Bungie.net members fought hard and used their best teamwork, but were caught off guard and the moderators triumphed. One thing is clear in all of this: The moderators are laggy and probably cheated. :(
Thanks for El Roboto for the screenshots, Muffin Man for hosting and organizing, AblativeMeatshield for hosting the saved films, and everyone else, Member and Moderator alike, who participated! It was a blast, and everyone was fairly good sports. Except Achilles.
[Edited on 10.28.2007 2:45 PM PDT]