- BerserkerBarage
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- Exalted Mythic Member
MY LOVE FOR YOU IS LIKE A TRUCK...
Posted by: Langley
--on another note, I think MLG Chewhatever is an idiot.
Posted by: Achronos
There is a reason I am user ID 1 and my account creation date is before this site came online.
Group 2 write-up.
So here I sit in my backyard reminiscing about the battles of yesterday. Like your grandfather war stories, your memory tends to hang on the high notes and quickly dismiss the unpleasant. But my war story deals with the mods, so there will be plenty of “unpleasant”.
I was told that I would be in group 2 in the members versus mods games, which was fine by me. That was until I had to sit around waiting for my chance at the mods. Then it was like I was that little kid on Christmas waiting to see if he got that Red Rider BB gun. The wait was unbearable. I wanted to know what was going on in the games. I wanted to play in the games. But then I remembered that someone said that “patience is a virtue”. I also remember that the person who said that sucks.
Finally the first group of games ends, and I get invited to the party. I cross the velvet rope and see my competition: Ash, Fragula, JAF, Achilles, Cam, and Chris. However, from reading Zag’s report, Chris didn’t say much, and like a shadow quickly departed without a word being said. But the Shadow knows…
Next thing I notice is that there are not many members showing up to our little soiree. Do the other members know something I don’t? If we beat the mods are we getting perma-banned from the forums? For whatever reason some of the people who had signed up to play for the members didn’t arrive, and so Muffin Man found himself in the quandary to try to find replacements. He was actually tentative about playing again himself because he feared that the other forum members would think he was “cheating” by allowing himself to play twice and would be upset. I reassured him, “don’t worry Muffin, if they get pissy, you’re in a room full of people who regulate the pissy”. Little did I know that just like Warren G and Nate Dogg, the mods were looking to regulate for a second round.
I calmly asked how the first set of matches went, fully expecting excusing to come flowing from the mods like the great Mississippi. What I got in return was unexpected and appalling. “We won” said Achilles. “Yep” replied JAF. Holy plasma punch-out Batman, am I seriously underestimating the mods here? Had they been practicing recently in their super-secret HFCS bunker? Had Tom being supping them up on MLG ‘roids? How could this happen. So I plainly stated, “don’t lie Achilles, I’ll check the stats.” They weren’t lying and I realized that this wasn’t going to be the walk in the park I thought it was going to be.
Game 1: Team Slayer on Construct
Tone: Testing the waters
When I first joined the custom game party there was mention of Valhalla. I was excited. Valhalla happens to be one of my best maps to play on. For better or worse, I make liberal uses of the sp’laser. When Muffin Man told me the first game would be on Construct, one of my least favorite maps, my excitement went down considerably. If you are familiar with Construct, at the beginning of a Team Slayer match the two teams start facing each other on the bottom floor. What normally happens is a mad rush to get to the lifts to get to the second level which normally leads to a few quick kills. I happen to be one of them. So were two of my teammates. I ran out quickly and found myself squarely against 3 mods. I was dropped quicker than Michael Vick from the Falcons. Waiting to respawn, Achilles strolls over and presumes to tea-bag me. Oh, it’s going to be like that? Not a good idea Achilles, tea-baggin’ me makes me angry, and you wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.
Like Battletoads I finally make it to the second level. And I’d pretty much remain on the second level for the rest of the match. I quickly separated Achilles from the sword and went on a killing spree. Not before the mods make it to 10 kills first. We are actually down 10 – 7 in the beginning. The game get tied at 15 a piece, and I’m standing by the left lift with the sword…and who happens to come up my lift? None other than Achilles. Remember that sword I took away from you Achilles? I’m sure you do now. Gratuitous tea-bagging ensues. Soon after, Achilles calls me out. He knows that I have the sword, and he also knows where I like to hide when I have the sword. So, we play a game of “betcha can’t stick it” and he proves me wrong…again. I sword him; run away giggling before blowing up in a ball of blue plasma. Fragula pops up one of the lifts with a missile pod. Apparently he is a fan of the “speak softly but carry a big missile pod” mentality. One missile to the face, and I’m looking at the respawn timer.
The game is relatively close towards the end, and I remember actually making the comment over team-chat that, “we need to put this one to bed, they are catching up quickly”. A couple minutes later and the game ends, Members 50 – Mods 45.
Game 2: VIP on High Ground.
Tone of game: Fail of Titanic Proportions.
Second game we have lined up is VIP on High Ground. My team starts out in the base while the Mods start out at the beach. This is one of the few times where spawning in the base might be the advantage. I’m a big fan of using the sp’laser in VIP games. One shot kills even the VIP. So, that’s what I plan on doing. I rush Sp’laser tower, pick it up and start lining up EvilCam, the mods first VIP. A split-second before I obliterate Cam in a laser show of win…he registers a sniper shot straight through my visor. I thought the sniper was supposed to be trash in this game. Apparently Cam didn’t get the memo. \
Achilles smartly grabbed rockets and made good use of them, kills our VIP, kills me, and kills another one of my teammates. I respawn with that horrible announcer voice going “NEW VIP”. Son of a biscuit eating bull-dog. Luckily I quickly find a shotty and I’m heading for the “pill-box”. I come up through the base, and I happen to stumble across something that surprises me. I’m not surprised often in Halo, but I turn the corner and see Fragula on a Ghost in the room next to the gate controls, and I was actually shocked. 3 shotty rounds and Frag’s Ghost is now parallel parked inside the base.
Fragula happened to be carrying a bubble shield. My shopping list is now complete. Shotgun: check; Bubble shield: check: regenerating overshield: check; It’s time to camp sp’laser tower. The sp’laser tower is one of the few places on High Ground that is very very tactical. It offers only 2 traditional ways to enter. Up the stairs or jumping from “high-gate” up to it. The second option is a hard jump to accomplish, so most people opt for option one. I was counting on that. EvilCam was the first to take the stairs into a shotty round to the face. The mods quickly figured out what I was doing and came up with another option. Use the grav lift to jump into sp’laser tower. I was counting on that too. As soon as I heard the grav lift deployed, I dropped my bubble shield and waited for the on coming onslaught. 3 mods come pouring into the bubble, and 3 mods lay dead from shotgun rounds to the face. Fragula figures he’ll try his hand at deporting me from my camping spot and grav lifts up to me. However this time, like so many times in high school, I shoot too early; my shotty rounds hitting the bubble shield instead of Fragula, and he lands a melee on me sending me flying out of sp’laser tower. I have to admit that I feel embarrassed and a little dejected.
The scoring goes back and forth for the majority of the game. We’d score a point. They’d even it up. Lather, rinse, repeat. I knew we were in trouble when Muffin Man starts remarking about our lack of teamwork. He’s right. At the end the Mods circled the wagons making it increasingly difficult to kill their VIP and we ran around like FEMA. Everyone barking orders and nothing getting accomplished. We actually are leading the game 9 – 7 but the Mods quickly get two quick VIP kills making it 9 – 9. One final VIP kill while I’m running in from the beach, and the Mods pull it out, much to my embarrassment. To give the mods credit, they did work far better as a team than we did.
(part 2 follows)
[Edited on 10.28.2007 2:15 PM PDT]