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Bungie decides who gets the Recon armor, as everyone else has already said. The criteria to get it are intentionally kept a bit vague. All we know about it is one must do something that impresses Bungie. Be it an interesting vid, interesting map, or awesome contribution to the community, the primary goal is to impress Bungie. How to do that...is a bit indiscernible.
Just do something, and if it gets noticed, awesome. If nothing comes of it, oh well. The point of playing a game is to have an enjoyable experience. Don't take that away from yourself simnply because there is an armor permutation which you might want.
The flaming pieces of armor is a Bungie only thing. The only way to get that is to be hired on to Bungie themselves.