Off Topic: The Flood
This topic has moved here: Poll [18 votes]: Correct and Deserved Punishment for 343 Guilty Spark?
  • Poll [18 votes]: Correct and Deserved Punishment for 343 Guilty Spark?
Subject: 343 GS's Final Punishment?
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

Poll: Correct and Deserved Punishment for 343 Guilty Spark?  [closed]
I'l kill the little bugger myself!(explain how):  11%
(2 Votes)
Place between 2 large magnets:  28%
(5 Votes)
Universal Exile:  0%
(0 Votes)
Cruel torture until he dies(what form of torture?):  0%
(0 Votes)
Funny Farm(Insane Asylum):  22%
(4 Votes)
EMP Blast:  0%
(0 Votes)
Set him free to destroy all sentient life:  11%
(2 Votes)
Other(please explain):  28%
(5 Votes)
Total Votes: 18

If 343 Guilty Spark appears in Halo 2 and the Master Chief manages to catch him, what form of punishment do you think he should get for his crimes? After all, he did try to eliminate all sentient life in the universe by releasing the flood, and he also tried to take the AI construct(Cortana) from you. I think he should be thrown into a padded room in an insane asylum so he can't hurt himself or others. After all, the books did describe him as, possibly insane, lol.

  • 06.09.2004 9:37 PM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

Put duct tape over his eye, play a few bowling games with him, stuff him in a bowling bag, tie on weights, throw in the ocean, listen to him scream as he short circuits.

  • 06.09.2004 9:43 PM PDT

Five Tenets of Bungie.net Forum Life:
1. Trolls will always be well fed.
2. Blame-ability thy name is stosh.
3. Bungie has no control over retail prices.
4. Watch out for low-flying defense drones.
5. Seven is not optional, but rather, an inevitability.

Rip out whatever makes him hover, then give him to MLS for a soccer ball, while I watch as he screams his lightbulb off because of the pain. I would then taking him to an open field, get a crossbow and about five hundred arrows and shoot him repeatedly with the same arrow. Next, I would torture him by waving a can of oil or a new lightbulb in front of him while he just lays there screaming. Finally, I would put him in a cannon, raise the cannon till it was around ten feet off the ground, aim it at the ground, and fire his ass out of it, and put a "Piss here" sign next to the hole he made in the ground. Twisted yes, but you can't deny it, he deserves every bit of it.

  • 06.09.2004 9:44 PM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

Funny Farm all the way.

No wait! Use him as a bowling ball!

[Edited on 6/9/2004 9:46:08 PM]

  • 06.09.2004 9:45 PM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

Nicely put cannon!

  • 06.09.2004 9:45 PM PDT

Five Tenets of Bungie.net Forum Life:
1. Trolls will always be well fed.
2. Blame-ability thy name is stosh.
3. Bungie has no control over retail prices.
4. Watch out for low-flying defense drones.
5. Seven is not optional, but rather, an inevitability.

Posted by: Assassin B
Nicely put cannon!


Thank you.

  • 06.09.2004 9:47 PM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

.........annoy the hell out of him.

  • 06.09.2004 9:49 PM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

watch him turn into the painful cycle of becoming a flood.

  • 06.09.2004 9:50 PM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

The two magnets is effective AND creative.

  • 06.09.2004 9:50 PM PDT
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

Make him look after bratty 6-year-olds.

  • 06.09.2004 9:55 PM PDT

-S

Make him moderate the Flood for a week.

<3 ;)

  • 06.09.2004 10:02 PM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

Posted by: Shishka
Make him moderate the Flood for a week.

<3 ;)


Awesome...

  • 06.09.2004 10:15 PM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

i would shove acid down his robotic pee hole

  • 06.09.2004 11:01 PM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

-deep breath-
First, we take a pineapple. Cut it open, drain it, fill it with C4, duct tape it back together, and shove it up his mechanical rear end. Then we strap him to a land mine, dangle him out of a helecopter on a rope, ram him into a few buildings (Saddam statues or something like that) at high speeds, (setting off the mine and C4). then we take his wreckage, hurl it into an erupting volcano, wait for the lava to cool and dig him out. Now we put him in an airtight canister with a bottle of my dogs farts, pop the cork and seal him in. we then take said canister, hurl it into a supernova explosion, and laugh as it transforms into a black hole and sucks him in. but due to the space-time warping effects of black holes, part of him (maybe not the real him, but just the illusion of him) is stuck on the event horizon (edge) for eternity.

so we kick it. twice.

  • 06.10.2004 9:45 AM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

Posted by: ajenteks
The two magnets is effective AND creative.


Yeah it is, but remember, robots tend to sing folk songs when near or between magnets right before they die.

  • 06.10.2004 11:41 AM PDT

I've tried, Jiminy! Oh how I've tried. My hand is a withered claw!

Then you're a -blam!-. And you'll get the -blam!- ending you deserve.

First we'd rip out his hovering equipment. We'd take a plasma sword, and slowly shave off layer after layer, laughing at his screams of terror as the molten metal hisses and puddles on the ground. We'd put him in a container lined with frag charges and boot his ass off a plane from thirty thousand feet up. On the fall down he'd have a giant subwoofer strapped to him, shaking his circuitry like a jackhammer, and have a twoway radio attached to him so we could laugh and trashtalk him as he hysterically begs for mercy. Upon impact the frag charges would explode and thousands of red-hot, twisted spikes speared with elephant feces would shred his body to pieces. We'd make him listen to country music for several days inside a dark room while acid drips onto his pitiful frame, a brutal version of Chinese torture. We'd take him up into space and laugh as he turns into a fireball and rockets through the atmosphere at more than a thousand miles per hour. We'd gather up his ashes and advertise it worldwide so thousands of people could take turns pissing on him. Finally, whatever tiny scraps remain would be mixed with sand in the litterbox of a gastrically troubled cat.

  • 06.10.2004 11:59 AM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

Posted by: Shishka
Make him moderate the Flood for a week.

<3 ;)


well put. i agree,


or, remove his abilities to navigate and tie him to the back of a semi-truck leaving california heading to norht carolina...

  • 06.10.2004 12:02 PM PDT