- last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT
Posted by: lellowranger
...the blinding rays of light hit the car I was hiding behind. I ducked and rolled out of the way just in time, as I got back up I fired 6 rounds into his chest. It didn't work! They just bounced off as he laughed maniacally and chanted the spell again. The beams of light shot again and a threw an old lady that was walking along to sidewalk into them just in time. There was a burst of flame, and there was no more old lady. I ran to the nearest car and jacked it. The only way I had time for this was because the nerd had drained most of his magic power and need to take a 2+ potion to heel himelf. I drove away after hot wiring this sweet corvette. I drove to the nearest gun store while calling the police on my cell. "911 what is your emergency?" I just got attacked by a nerd!" I yelled. "Oh dear god, Bill, call alert 5. Just do it, damn it! Sorry, where were you attacked? "The neighborhoodm duh!" I responded. "We'll get swat over there as fast as possible." The line hung up. The swat team wold only hold off this horror for only so long, but it would give me enought time to get a secret weapon.
Alas, the nerd would not give up so easily. Upon hearing the giveaway sirens, he instantly whipped out a transmitting device - and in a few commands, accessed his private computer terminal deep in the Nevada desert. With a cackle and a incomprehensible nerd call, he unleashed a deadly Hoiven Mk 77Bd903285JGD-09ff Virus upon the SWAT mobiles, which were instantly eradicated in a mass of flame.
I saw my oppurtunity to make a run for it, and fled into the wreckage. My foe was furious. With a mighty roar, he pounded his chest and shifted to the Shadow Realm. Everything went a deep shade of purple, and had a strange aura about it.
I knew he now had a potentially fatal advantage on me -- now he was a level 99 and had infinite MP. I stumbled around helplessly inside the wrecked house, looking for - something, anything to combat this evil. All the time I could hear the ground shake as his gigantic feet crashed down again and again, slowly progressing to my location to unleash the Ultima attack on me.
And then I found it - the fridge. Desperately, I tore off the glowing door and found what I had been looking for for so long, the only weapon effective against the nerd - a salad bowl.