- FinalHazard006
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- Noble Legendary Member
Posted by: jubking
I think i'll post my English Coursework up here :D
it is very long and got a 19/20 thats an A* whoop!
The End…
John decided it was worth the risk and entered the old derelict house; maybe there was a phone inside he could use to phone for help. He opened the old rotting and splintering door and then suddenly an overpowering stench of rancid meat filled John’s airways, he gagged for a second before blocking out the thought of the stench. He then entered the house.
John found himself in a small corridor that stretched all of the way to the back of the house. There were four doors on either side of the corridor, a trap door above John’s head and at the end of the corridor was an eerily dark set of stairs. The house was miraculously clean for something that appeared derelict from the outside; the only trace of dirt was a thin layer of dust that covered the whole corridor. John decided to look in the door closest to his right.
John reached for the door handle, as he touched it a shiver ran down his spine. As he turned the handle he felt his hand began to warm, and then boil. John pulled his hand away and clenched it, his hand was ice cold. The door then started to swing open of its own accord, a small cloud of dust blew into John’s eyes and as he looked up what he saw made his blood run cold…
John saw a man standing in the room. There were no furnishings in the room; there were water stains all over the ceiling and walls, a single light bulb hanging loosely from the ceiling. The man was tall, had jet black hair; lime green eyes and had a very dark expression on his face. John sighed in relief, at first he thought it was his father in the room but this man was far too young, and besides his father was in the hospital another fifteen miles down the road. John then noticed that in one of the corners of the room was a small boy huddled up in a ball; he looked just like a younger version of the man but with brown hair. John was about to start explaining to the man why he was intruding, when the man shifted his gaze from one of the walls to the boy and approached him. The man stood in front of the child for a moment and without warning raised a fist and drove it directly into the small boy’s ribs. John was horrified; he had some experience with this kind of thing. As the man raised his fist again John charged at him head first, but before he cleared the doorframe, the door swung shut hitting John on the head: he slowly slipped into unconsciousness.
When John awoke the first thing he thought was to help the boy he had just seen. John staggered to his feet and ripped the door open. There was no longer a room there but in its place was a large brick wall. John didn’t understand; it didn’t make sense that a solid brick wall was put up in… John realised. How long had he been unconscious? He looked at his watch, it was three fifteen, and John had been out for three hours.
John resolved to continue looking for a phone, so he reached for the next door handle. Another shiver ran down his spine and the door swung open.
John saw a great field and a large building further back. The grass was emerald green and the sweet smell of spring hit John like a thousand tiny pinpricks. The building was large, it had many doors and a small tower, there were many children running around and playing, it was a school. John realised that he was looking out onto a school field; John saw the same boy that was being hit running around on the field, only he looked a little taller and had no signs that he had been beaten. John saw a woman in a black suit walking toward the child followed closely by a woman with a small badge on that he couldn’t quite make out. Although John was several metres away he could hear the woman in the suit clearly greet the young boy and tell him that the other woman was Margaret from Social Services. John was about to approach one of the women when the door violently swung shut. John pulled the door open but all that was there was a solid brick wall. John was confused but decided to check the other doors. He needed a phone and besides, he was by now more than a little curious.
John grabbed the door handle of the third door; a shiver ran down his spine. The door swung open.
John saw a large hall, filled with people. He noticed that most of them were university graduates; they were wearing the tell-tale mortar boards. There was a large stage set at the front of the hall, someone walked up on to the stage, John couldn’t hear anything but just as a diploma was being handed to the person he heard “is awarded to John Abbot”. John slammed the door shut. John Abbot was his name, how could there be a hall and a field next to each other in a house? Where did those places seem familiar from? Why did that person have the same name as him? It then hit John; this place was some sort of sick slideshow of the key events in his own life.
John felt faint, his mind was racing, and who would do this? Why would they do this? How did they do this? He decided to get out of there but as he turned to leave the house he noticed that the front door he had come in from was gone. John realised that whoever was doing this wanted John to see through all of the doors.
John opened another door, the now familiar shiver ran down his spine, he saw a bar, there were lots of people, and there was Julie. John closed the door. He hadn’t seen her since the accident and he didn’t need to have her shoved in his face now.
John opened the next door and saw a room full of people, all dressed in fancy clothes. He saw a dance floor and in the middle he saw himself, he saw Julie and he saw Charlie. John slammed the door shut, tears in his eyes he punched the door, the wooden door splintered and dug into his fist, John blocked out the thought of the pain. John decided that he should open the next door, but he already knew what was coming.
In his fury, John ripped open the next door so that it hung off of one hinge. He found himself looking into a car, there was Julie, he saw his best friend at the time Charlie and he saw himself. Charlie was driving the car and John was shouting at Charlie, telling him that he was drunk and that he had to stop the car. The car started to swerve more and more violently and then finally rammed through the railing of a bridge. As the car careened off of the side of the bridge and soared over a lake, time seemed to slow. John saw Charlie smash through the windscreen and Julie scream as the car smashed into the water and began to sink. Time sped back up and he saw the car fill up with water as he saw himself pull Julie’s unconscious body out of the now fully submerged car. John tried to close the door but he had broken the hinge, he was forced to watch his wife die all over again. John saw himself pull Julie out of the car and swim to the bank, and then he saw himself collapse. John then noticed that on the other side of the lake, in the distance was a small door hanging in mid air and in the doorframe was Julie, standing and looking at him. John fell to the floor in tears and when he looked up; he saw only a brick wall.
John stood up and wiped the tears from his eyes, he opened the next door and saw a graveyard, there was a tombstone with the words ‘here lies Charlie King’ John saw him self approach the tombstone, spit on it and walk away. John closed that door quickly and coldly.
John opened the last door with great hesitation; he was shaken up by seeing the highlights of his life in an hour. He saw himself driving a car on a mobile phone. He remembered from earlier that day, this was the call he had received from the hospital saying that his dad was in a coma. John then saw a small truck come out of the blue and collide with his lime green Mini Cooper. John saw himself careen through the window screen and hit the front of the truck that must have been going at near forty miles per hour. The thing that confused John was that he couldn’t see this house anywhere and that he had survived that crash. John closed the door.
John looked to see if the door out of the house had appeared back but there was still only a blank wall. As John wheeled around to take his last option of ascending the staircase he saw a hooded figure descend it. It wasn’t a skull or the devil, and it wasn’t hideous or terrifying… It was a familiar face. John collapsed in a heap on the floor, crying he looked up and screamed, ‘You’re not real!’
‘Yes I am John…’ said Julie calmly. ‘Please John. Stay with me. You have to. Forever.’
Julie ran a finger down the side of John’s face, John shivered; it was cold to the touch John began to panic, he knew that he couldn’t stay with Julie here, not yet, it wasn’t his time, he knew that much. ‘No!’ said John defiantly ‘I’m not ready to die’.
‘I am sorry John, I truly am, but it’s not something that can be un-done, the end is the end. All you can do is stay here, with me.’ Julie replied
‘I can’t stay, there has to be a way to go back, I’m not ready to die’ John whimpered.
‘The only way for someone to go back, is for a parting of ways, two souls are split permanently, and they can never meet again… John, do you really want that, you will never be able to see me again!’ Julie began to scream.
‘I’m sorry,’ John said, more collected now. ‘But I have to go…’
‘Ok’ Said Julie, calmly, tears running down her pale, cold face.
‘Well, how does this work?’ said John.
‘Goodbye John.’ Said Julie, her dry and pale face glistening with tears.
‘Good…’ John started.
‘Clear!’ Julie Screamed.
Excellent story. At first, i thought it was going to be just another story where John switches with the kid being beaten, so John is beaten for eternity and the kid gets to live his life.