Bungie.net Community
This topic has moved here: Subject: An Interview With Yoozel
  • Subject: An Interview With Yoozel
  • Pages:
  • 1
  • 2
  • of 2
Subject: An Interview With Yoozel

Loose talk is noose talk.

*Please excuse the bump as this post is over 10,000 characters*...(I blame stosh) Long read, but worth it.

I recently sat down with moderator Yoozel and conducted an interview. This interview reveals hidden clues about Bungie, and if you are alert, you will notice a slight pattern in his answers.

For future reference, I (the interviewer) am Bob Bobinson, or BB, and my text is bolded. Yoozel (the interviewee) is not bolded.

Please post comments.

THE INTERVIEW
Bob Bobinson: How are you today?. It's very nice to meet you.

Yoozel: I'm doing alright

BB: So Yoozel, tell me about your life at Bungie. What is a typical day for you?

Y: Well... a typical day starts off with a visit to HFCS to check for any super secret stuff that I may need to know and then I turn to my inbox. Generally it's over flowing with tons of messages, threats, etc... etc... think of it like a flood infestation.

BB: Are you free to disclose any of this super secret stuff?

Y: Sorry... but I can't... we retain a strict policy on secrecy.

BB: What are the requirements of becoming a moderator, for those at home to busy to read your stickies?

Y: Really... it's a fine line to walk. We tell people to be a good member and we mean it. Don't start wars and always try to be the 'better' guy but don't be a jerk and try to flaunt powers you don't have. Doing your best to help the community and chime in with some decent posts from time to time. We look for people who have a firm grasp of the English language and who can conduct themselves appropriately. Don't suck up and don't ask... that's why we ask you because you never know who's watching your every move. ;)

BB: Yes. I see. When approached by the offer, why did you decide to become a moderator?

Y: Well... back in the day there was a group called Chapter Founders which originally housed the Septagon forum... it was sort of the pinnacle of all groups/chapters because it was where all the great minds came together to brainstorm. Well soon after I had signed up for Bungie.net I was granted a role in the group as an officer and that was seen as a big thing back in the day. Needless to say, when Bungie.net re-launched in 2004, Bungie had asked me to help out and I agreed, I figured it'd be a cool gig to hold onto for awhile... little did we know that it'd grow into something much larger than us all!

BB: So you were chosen because of your awesome ideas on the Chapter Founders?

Y: Not so much that... more because officers were basically moderators who helped founders and maintained the group. We basically did what the moderators do now... only on a smaller scale... and with less troublesome users (laughs).

BB: I see. Have you ever met the Webmaster or any other Bungie employee?

Y: Are you kidding?! I'm sitting right across from that stinkin’ ape! Employees, no... I haven't had the pleasure to meet any. I've never even been to Seattle so that could be a bit of a problem.

BB: I agree, living 5,000 miles away can be a little issue. To our readers at home who are new to Bungie, who is Stosh and why is he blamed for everything?

Y: Stosh? Well... he's a long crusty story... He's an original community member who's spent a long time on Bungie and has helped shaped it in some ways. He's also the head moderator and currently Bungie Contractor. Currently he's working on breaking...I mean improving the website and other tasks... needless to say... Bungie blamed him for everything, we should too. Also... you can insert <Stosh's mom> into any yo momma joke because it's perfectly acceptable.

BB: Are you planning on working for Bungie as something other than a moderator later on in your life?

Y: Ideally... I would enjoy it. Realistically I don't really possess many skills that they require... but one day if something opens up that I can remotely relate too I might give it a shot. But Bungie doesn't hire just anyone so for anyone out there planning to go through college with every intention of being an employee one day... start working now because you'll really have to shine out of the crowds of hundreds.

BB: On the subject of video games, what is your all time favorite game (excluding Bungie games)?

Y: I'd have to go with Warcraft... I remember playing it back in the DOS days and having such a blast with it. Not only has it continued to evolve and suck away my life but it's kind of a comfort game. No matter how old it is, I can still go back, boot it up and have fun just like it was day one.

BB: So would you say you are a real life nerd, as in, do you spend your days staring at C# programming code and think about Dungeons and Dragons?

Y: Not to that extent... plus I was never into D&D. Regardless, I still use bad internet humor in the real world, have spent a lot of time pigging out at LAN parties and always seem to find myself gravitating towards electronic stores to play with new things. So I guess you can call me a nerd to an extent, but I think there's a little nerd in all of us.

BB: I can agree with that.

Y: (laughs) We all have our moments where we're like "That is so freakin’ awesome", "You mean that computer?", "Look at that display" *drool*.

BB: Yeah. I remember when Windows ME came out. Good hopes turn bad.

Y: http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/ballmer_peak.png

BB: Back to the subject of being a mod, do your real life friends know you are a Ninja?

Y: Yeah... we all joke about it though... No one really gives much mind to it in the outside world.

BB: Compare that with Bungie world, most people are like this whenever you or another ninja post,"ZOMG it is teh ninjazorz! Ima hide mah hack t00lz now (slight overstatement)"

Y: Hah... while it's true online... outside you're just another person. Sadly I tried running around with a big button that said blacklisted... But no one ended up disappearing... maybe in another dimension.

BB: Just maybe. How many people do you ban daily, and do you enjoy that process?

Y: I wouldn't call banning an enjoyable process though you can get a laugh out of some people's failures. Regardless, it's there because people need to be reminded of the rules, really... deep down, we don't hate you. We just wish you would pay attention to the few simple things we ask. As for a number... depends on how much time I spent on Bungie.net throughout the day... it can probably be between 20-100+ people.

BB: On the topic of Recon, why do you think you deserve it?

Y: I wouldn't really want to go out there and say that I absolutely deserve it anymore than anyone else. But Bungie awarded it to us for our service to the community. Personally I've been a Moderator for around four and a half years... I think that's a lot of time spent on helping the community.

BB: Well, if I had it, I would be worrying about people calling Xbox support for my password. Do you ever worry about that?

Y: I do... but it's something I try to keep off my mind at the same time.

BB: What are your English credentials (i.e. High School Drop-Out, English Major in Community College, etc.) which was required for you to become a Ninja?

Y: At least a firm grasp and understanding... you don't need to be a master in linguistics to be a moderator. You just need to be able to communicate effectively and be able to convey your idea properly. In other words, college level (which is arguable by some, heh).

BB: What would you say your favorite TV show is?

Y: Uhh... wow... It's been that long since I've watched TV!

BB: Would you say back in the era of the Howdy Doody Show?
Y: Not quite that long ago... No Reservations with Anthony Bourdain.

BB: What is your opinion of Rick Roll?

Y: Annoying... it's not funny and it's not cool... even if 4Chan says it is.

BB: There was a day way back when it was popular. That sun has already set. Do you think it shall rise again?

Y: Hopefully not... it appears as if it's trying to as a joke but that's all it ever will be.

BB: People sometimes say you are as drunk as the Webmaster. Is this rumor true?

Y: It has yet to stop at this point... and I doubt it ever will!

BB: So you admit then? You know the first step to fixing a problem is admitting you have a
problem.


Y: It's not a problem if you have a partner in crime... duh!

BB: Exactly.

Y: (Laughs)

BB: How long did it take you to write this page: http://www.bungie.net/Forums/posts.aspx?postID=17900076 ?

Y: About a day... It was really about sitting down and figuring out what needs to be added and what needs to be rearranged. A lot of people didn't understand implied rules so we decided it'd be easier to just lay them all out and throw a few kickers in there.

BB: You do realize most people are like "ok. Ima post now, read lat3r"

Y: It's apparent... regardless, don't come crying to us when you get blacklisted. When you sign up to Bungie.net you agreed to the rules and you accept your fate. We're not here to hold your hands or play mum.

BB: Yes. Let that be to a warning to all of you. He's watching you.

Y: Cue Mr. Burns evil laugh...

BB: Do you have any comment on Shishka?

Y: If only people knew... And I'll leave it at that.

BB: Probably some super secret HFCS stuff anyway. By the way, what does HFCS stand for?

Y: If I told you... I'd have to kill you... and I mean seriously... kill you dead. That's how serious we are!

BB: HFCS= Halo Fun Club(s). That's my guess. "I will kill you so much, you will die from it"

Y: (Laughs) The world may never know.

(Con't on bump)

  • 03.18.2008 4:54 PM PDT

Loose talk is noose talk.

BB: True story? : “The path to ninjaness begins with a phone call. A gruff voice speaks, sounding vaguely simian. The voice tells you to go to the nearest airport. Tickets are waiting. You arrive at the airport. Massive jumbo jets surround you. Luxury executive aeroplanes await. You look at your ticket, and look around until you can find it. Terminal 7. You look on in disbelief. A chair with pedals and a helicopter blade. Eventually, you reach your destination: Hawaii. Great, you think. Then you bump it all goes black…”

Y: Only the chosen will ever know... wait... Hawaii? Ah c'mon... I was in freaking Canada...

BB: Or the version with the cold noodle slapping... How did the noodle feel on your face? (Canada is better than Hawaii. They have Hockey there)… (and people who go EH? a lot)

Y: (The beer is so - so... don't tell Bentllama I was bashing them!) …well... umm... about the noodle.. It's kind'a traumatic...

BB: What was it, seven days of getting slapped by a cold noodle? Whilst naked in front of a guy in a monkey suit? Well I can imagine that process to be very traumatizing to you.

Y: *breaks down* To all those frat guys out there... you have no clue what hazzing is.

BB: Well, thanks you for the interview Yoozel! Have a good night!

Y: Have a good night Bob! I'm off to punish the jerks of the world... take care!

FIN

Check out the group where I recieved my orders to do this interview: http://www.bungie.net/fanclub/162345/Group/GroupHome.aspx


[Edited on 03.18.2008 5:08 PM PDT]

  • 03.18.2008 4:55 PM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

*Reserved for future psycic readings*...

Btw nice interview =)...

  • 03.18.2008 5:00 PM PDT

/============== ===================== ==== ================\
| The RDS Project | Seventh Column Troopers | ΑAA | The B.net PM Policy |
\============== ===================== ==== ================/

"If you have nothing to say, don't say it."

ಠ _ ಠ

Amusing. [/intention of expressing amusement]

  • 03.18.2008 5:03 PM PDT

Average Joe l Youtube Channel l Twitter
Fools react, masters respond

~B.B.

Thanks! It was definately worth it, espiecally about Stosh. I am going to include him into more Stosh's Mom jokes.

  • 03.18.2008 5:06 PM PDT

Video of Rodent's Abode
Posted by: Cockburnicus
You missed the point like Vader missed the banshee, your whole argument is covered in bees.
Stop sending me group invites -blam!-s!

Isn't this like the thrid interview with Yoozel?

  • 03.18.2008 5:13 PM PDT

Loose talk is noose talk.

Fourth. But who's counting.... Stosh's mom, of course
Posted by: muffin man one
Isn't this like the third interview with Yoozel?


[Edited on 03.18.2008 5:18 PM PDT]

  • 03.18.2008 5:15 PM PDT

Average Joe l Youtube Channel l Twitter
Fools react, masters respond

~B.B.

Stosh's mom scored -3 in bed last night.

  • 03.18.2008 5:18 PM PDT

Wow that interview was hotter than stoshs mom!!!

  • 03.18.2008 5:29 PM PDT

That was very well done. Good job thread maker and Yoozel.

  • 03.18.2008 5:42 PM PDT

Loose talk is noose talk.

Your welcome.
Posted by: burritosenior
That was very well done. Good job thread maker and Yoozel.

  • 03.18.2008 5:45 PM PDT

yoo•zel- ('yoo-zhul): slang: vb.

Officium quod Fidelitas.

Second actually... I don't believe I even accepted an interview until 2008. :)

STOSH'S MUM FTW!!!

Posted by: muffin man one
Isn't this like the thrid interview with Yoozel?

  • 03.18.2008 8:41 PM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

Nice interview.

Yoozel get prepared to ban 100's of ppl tonight.

  • 03.18.2008 8:52 PM PDT

Posted by: Killtakular905
bungie duz not care bout me :'( /wrists
Posted by: Piercingtiger
Halo 3 brand toothpaste (It finishes the fight....against cavities!
Posted by: Biliruben
I'm so good at Halo, Chuck Norris has me as an avoided player.

Nice. Best interview since Sketch's interview of the Soul.

  • 03.18.2008 9:15 PM PDT

HATERS GONNA' HATE

Almost as good as my, "interview," with Stosh's mom last night.

  • 03.18.2008 9:24 PM PDT

Even after the darkest nights, morning always comes.

A good interview all round. Some, ah, interesting things to be said, no doubt.

Stosh's Mom?... Lol...

  • 03.18.2008 10:55 PM PDT
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

SPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!

I'd like to state publicly that Yoozel is the boss of me, nor will he ever be anywhere near being the boss of me.

Though he is the boss of you, so be afraid. Be very afraid.

Awesome interview yet again. Yoozel can be very eloquent when he wants to be. He should be an author or something. Good questions and follow ups as well OP.

[Edited on 03.18.2008 11:40 PM PDT by Yoozel]

  • 03.18.2008 11:37 PM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

Posted by: evilcam
I'd like to state publicly that Yoozel is the boss of me, nor will he ever be anywhere near being the boss of me.

Though he is the boss of you, so be afraid. Be very afraid.

Awesome interview yet again. Yoozel can be very eloquent when he wants to be. He should be an author or something. Good questions and follow ups as well OP.


Pssh, I'll tie him to the radiator if he tries to be the boss of me. Or we'd both just get drunk, either way fun ensues. Yoozel <3

[Edited on 03.18.2008 11:40 PM PDT by Yoozel]

  • 03.18.2008 11:39 PM PDT
  •  | 
  • Exalted Mythic Member
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

The End

‘The conscious is cancerous if allowed to linger’

"Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there."

Agreed, Stosh's mum is full of win. Sadly her offspring never inherited her oh so great moves, looks, or gender.

Very nice interview!!!!

  • 03.19.2008 4:09 AM PDT
  • gamertag:
  • user homepage:
  • last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT

Posted by: evilcam
I'd like to state publicly that Yoozel is the boss of me, nor will he ever be anywhere near being the boss of me.

is the boss of me, nor will he ever be anywhere near being the boss of me.
is the boss of me, nor will he ever be.
Nice work. I seriously hope for your sake that this is some kind of in joke because what the hell.

Actually I hope it isn't an in joke because that's a really terrible joke.

  • 03.19.2008 4:14 AM PDT

HALO:
IT ISNT CHOPPY ENOUGH
IT ISNT DAKKA ENOUGH

verrah nice

i liek the way she moves! (stosh's mother :P)

  • 03.19.2008 4:20 AM PDT

MLG is for kids that are too fat to excel at real sports

New Flood the home of all things random

OMG, gaming for the fun of it.

Posted by: evilcam
I'd like to state publicly that Yoozel is the boss of me, nor will he ever be anywhere near being the boss of me.
Shouldn't that be ''Yoozel is not the boss of me''???

I thought mods had to be good at english, how did you slip through the net?

Anyway, good interview he came across as a nice bloke.

  • 03.19.2008 5:17 AM PDT

yoo•zel- ('yoo-zhul): slang: vb.

Officium quod Fidelitas.

I is boss... Evilcam is phailure!

  • 03.19.2008 11:02 AM PDT
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

Posted by: muffin man one
Isn't this like the thrid interview with Yoozel?

Yoozel is almost as much in demand as stosh's mom.

  • 03.19.2008 11:06 AM PDT

  • Pages:
  • 1
  • 2
  • of 2