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  • Subject: Halo Fanfic: The End of a War
Subject: Halo Fanfic: The End of a War
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I will always place the mission first.
I will never accept defeat.
I will never quit.
I will never leave a fallen comrade.

I finally beat Chaos Theory it was an awesome game and I might get Doom 3, but I am not sure, thinking about it though. Keep up the great work Mr. Clark.

  • 04.16.2005 3:34 PM PDT
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wow - that was quite definately worth the wait. it may be my deranged imagination, but i reckon ackersons a dirty dirty traitor whos planning to destroy everyone/thing - maybe hes been mentally flooderised or something? just two major errors in there though - spelling ones i mean; before i point them out im only doing this to help improve the flow of the story, not to criticise the big MC. first the word 'technician' is spelt like that, not 'technision'. the other one is 'adorement' (when the arbiter speaks to the MC in the cell) should have been 'adoration'. oh, and sometimes you repeat a word in quick succession, for example 'the chief walked to the door, opened it and walked out' or something like that it was. ive dabbled in writing myself somewhat, so i know its really a question of style rather than an actual error, but it wouldve looked a lot better if youd replaced one of the 'walked's with 'strode' or something like that - it just looks better. sorry, all this is me being really -blam!-

other than that, this was a fantastic chapter, i love the way youre going with all the different character storylines, keep it up.

  • 04.16.2005 3:46 PM PDT
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mmm, that was some good chapter goodness there mr. c

keep it up man.

oh yeah, and by the way, this story's almost hit the 200 review mark on ff.net

all it needs is maybe 10 more and it'll become the highest reviewed halo story!

everybody get to it! review that story and push him past the mark!

  • 04.16.2005 3:47 PM PDT

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Yeah, it has been rather agrressive as of late. Some fanfic writers have even stopped writing cause of it. Sad really.

But once again, great chapter. I do see what some of the other readers are saying, but you still have a lot of wrting to go, so I'll be patient and hope for that awesome ending.

  • 04.16.2005 3:52 PM PDT
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Posted by: The Silky Carp
wow - that was quite definately worth the wait. it may be my deranged imagination, but i reckon ackersons a dirty dirty traitor whos planning to destroy everyone/thing - maybe hes been mentally flooderised or something? just two major errors in there though - spelling ones i mean; before i point them out im only doing this to help improve the flow of the story, not to criticise the big MC. first the word 'technician' is spelt like that, not 'technision'. the other one is 'adorement' (when the arbiter speaks to the MC in the cell) should have been 'adoration'. oh, and sometimes you repeat a word in quick succession, for example 'the chief walked to the door, opened it and walked out' or something like that it was. ive dabbled in writing myself somewhat, so i know its really a question of style rather than an actual error, but it wouldve looked a lot better if youd replaced one of the 'walked's with 'strode' or something like that - it just looks better. sorry, all this is me being really -blam!-

other than that, this was a fantastic chapter, i love the way youre going with all the different character storylines, keep it up.


No problem, that is one of the largest problems with me, and its something that can easily be fixed with editing....but I believe I've said it before my propensity for editing is about as likely as my suddenly finding a suit of Mjolnir armor on the road side.

One of the faithful readers took the time to edit the whole story aside from the last two chapters I believe, so when I get around to it, I'll edit the chapters on here and replace them with the grammatically correct ones.

And who knows, maybe one day I will finally find the time to give myself a sound beating so I learn that I must edit more on a regular basis.

  • 04.16.2005 3:52 PM PDT
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Posted by: Scorptank
Chill, go see a movie ;-)


I just noticed you always say that. i also just noticed something else but it is probably wrong. Is Zookazeme or how ever it is splet from the books related to the elite bloodline of those cursed elites from the ages? Also great chapter but with it being that long it should maybe should have been two different chapters but released at same time. But still that was a really great chapter which showed why Jan wants to be with Chief so much and many other things. I aplaud you (i don't know any good words for saying your awesome.).

[Edited on 4/16/2005]

  • 04.16.2005 5:37 PM PDT
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~I was born for the storm, and a calm does not suit me~

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That was SO TOTALY AWSOME!!! I've been really busy so now I am trying to catch up reading all my fav. fanfics. Is Ackerson talking about bringing Flood to test back to earth? Btw, Jan is really cool.

  • 04.16.2005 10:55 PM PDT
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Posted by: UnknownsoldierGT
Posted by: Scorptank
Chill, go see a movie ;-)


I just noticed you always say that.


It's from a really funny movie; Undercover Brother.
A guy is really paranoia (they call him Conspiracy Brother) and always thinks that people are plotting against him.
So this guy walks up to him and says "Chill, go see a movie"

  • 04.17.2005 2:53 AM PDT
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Hmm, here's another error I noticed: Mjolnor is supposed to be in all caps, like MJOLNIR. Maybe it's just like that in the Halo books but it seems to be capitalized fully everywhere, so ya.

  • 04.17.2005 10:44 AM PDT
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Posted by: Scorptank
Posted by: UnknownsoldierGT
Posted by: Scorptank
Chill, go see a movie ;-)


I just noticed you always say that.


It's from a really funny movie; Undercover Brother.
A guy is really paranoia (they call him Conspiracy Brother) and always thinks that people are plotting against him.
So this guy walks up to him and says "Chill, go see a movie"


I know that movie. It's so funny but i can't remember any quotes all i remember is that there was one white guy who no one liked untill like he was crazy at the end

  • 04.17.2005 2:28 PM PDT
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I will always place the mission first.
I will never accept defeat.
I will never quit.
I will never leave a fallen comrade.

I am pretty sure MJOLNIR is supposed to be capitalied because I think it stands for something just like NASA.

  • 04.17.2005 3:41 PM PDT
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You're right about the MJOLNIR capitalization.

Its been a long time since I read the books, and I was never very interested in the armor the Spartans wear, but I guess I should have been. All I was thinking as I typed the bit about the armor was, "Hmm, I wonder how hard it would actually be to fit the Norse God of Thunder's personal weapon in the room."

  • 04.17.2005 3:57 PM PDT
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I never have seen such power and excellence in one place.
Plus i read the books when i was 13, barely a lad, but now i seem to understand everything.
All is well, except for the UNBEARABLY long and interminable wait that is sure to come!!!
but take your time, be patient, for my ally is the Force, and a powerful ally it is
so when you try, try not! do, or do not, because there is no try.
man i love Star Wars, need new book of Jedi Academy series.

  • 04.17.2005 4:07 PM PDT
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~I was born for the storm, and a calm does not suit me~

CEC
╣Fire of Tru7h╠
The Campers

מִכְמַן

I think that if they made a movie about halo 1 and 2, that the storyline would be much better than that of Star Wars. Not to bash star wars, 'cause I like it a lot.

  • 04.17.2005 4:16 PM PDT
Subject: Halo Fanfic: The End of a War (Chapter 15 Released)
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great beginning. I'm reading the rest now.it sounds like a great book. Keep writing!!!
talk 2 ya lata!

  • 04.17.2005 4:35 PM PDT
Subject: Halo Fanfic: The End of a War
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Awesome chapter Mr. Clark. Thanks for the PM. How did the arbiter know about the prophets' betrayal in the past? Isn't history always written by the victors?

  • 04.17.2005 5:15 PM PDT
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Dear lordy lord, the flood in Halo 2 were hard enough, imagine having to duke it out with a Spartan 3.0 flood..... eeeep!

So I'm thinking with Akerson's hate of the "Cybernetic Freaks" he went all organic with the 3.0's? Hmmmm. Must have some spiffy upgrades in that there system of thars.

Looking forward to where ever your taking this story, can't wait! The flood tint kinda reminds me of Aliens (the corporations attempts to bring the aliens to earth) and the 3.0's of the Kurt Russell flick in 98 "Soldier".
Clark, you've got a great touch, always leave the fans hungry for more!! So I know you'll take it as a compliment when I say ... MORE DAMN YOU MORE!!

  • 04.17.2005 8:10 PM PDT
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Posted by: Serpensium_4
I never have seen such power and excellence in one place.
Plus i read the books when i was 13, barely a lad, but now i seem to understand everything.
All is well, except for the UNBEARABLY long and interminable wait that is sure to come!!!
but take your time, be patient, for my ally is the Force, and a powerful ally it is
so when you try, try not! do, or do not, because there is no try.
man i love Star Wars, need new book of Jedi Academy series.


that reminds me of my last chap of my fanfic, it had a tidbit from star wars in it, you would definatly enjoy that part if you did like starwars, i think im going to go watch it now :D

  • 04.17.2005 9:06 PM PDT
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Posted by: Scorptank
Posted by: UnknownsoldierGT
Posted by: Scorptank
Chill, go see a movie ;-)


I just noticed you always say that.


It's from a really funny movie; Undercover Brother.
A guy is really paranoia (they call him Conspiracy Brother) and always thinks that people are plotting against him.
So this guy walks up to him and says "Chill, go see a movie"



Lol that movie is so racist against white people....I think im going to go watch it in a few minnutes. Btw i loved the chapter. Maybe Dr.Hasley and Kelly will show up in the next chapter to try and stop ackerson.


So when can we expect the next chapter

  • 04.17.2005 9:56 PM PDT
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Hrmmm...

Can't say anything about Dr. Halsey and Kelly other than like the Taming of the Hunters, and the Prophet's true intentions, what appears to be the truth may be nothing more than an illusion. Forgetting for a moment that I'm being terribly tenebrous over the whole future of the characters in this world I'm helping to create. Eventually the goal of my writing will shift from just wanting to mold a piece of fine fiction, but to actually subjugate mankind, so draw whatever conclusions you wish from that statement.

As for Chapter 16, I've just started to toy around with the general outline. The problem generated from that is I usually become frustrated since outlines are the tool of the devil, and I use them with about as much effectiveness as I would a large piece of velcro. Granted this is spurred forth from my own incompetence, and a genuine lack of flourish when it comes to planning things out. I prefer to let my mind wander while writing, and sticking to a dictated decree that I must follow is like tying my hands behind my back, and forcing me to type with my tongue. Another instance of inconvienience that leaps to the forefront when I follow my free will with writing, is that my ideas get jumbled, and I will start inserting scenes and plot devices that not only have no place in the chapter, but within the entire story itself. Sometimes I think that if I were never given the oppurtunity to delete sections of my writing, than my fan base would consist of a desert plane, with not even a lone tumbleweed to draw attention. Even the cactuses would have given excuses as to why they did not appear, to at least give the area a more homely look.

The obstacles that seem to throw themselves with abandon into my path have grown more bold lately, and things have eroded to the point where I can barely walk from my front door to my room without having something appear that hinders my progression. What these obstacles are, I can truly not say, as whenever it comes to pass that I believe the worst is behind me, another stone is thrown into the mechanism that is my life, and I am forced to put out one more fire.

For those that check such things, you'll have noticed I actually played some Halo 2 multiplayer recently. This is an occurence that is indeed rare these days, and it speaks of the enormity of the rapidly declining status of my well-being. If there are any of those that were playing said game the past few days, and entered a game where a disgruntled player was speaking in rapid and broken Japanese, and turning in circles whilst trying to catch a grenade in their mouth, than I must admit it is likely you were playing a game with myself.

I STILL haven't caught myself up on everyone's stuff, and I blame both work, and an obsessive need of mine to try and control the world. That and the reasons stated above, which while not appearing to be reasons themselves, are indeed the fabric of my own undoing, and the eventual erosion of my mind.

These new developments have not affected my writing. In fact I dare say they may improve the quality, as it is often said that it takes a truly deranged mind to create a novel of importance for the world. Taken into context the thought of a Halo fanfiction somehow helping the world is quite absurd.

Since the auto-update occurs today, since it is already Monday as I type this, I will wish to see for myself some of the new changes, so for those that wish to play, I will be on at some time in the near future. If an invite is sent my way I will join you, unless if I am otherwise joined in a game with others, and in such a case I will in turn send you an invite.

I've already surpassed the weekly ranting limit, and if you are confused over the writing I have let spill into this post, than do not fret, since this is simply a result of my being far too concerned over things not concerning my writing, as well as being up for more than 24 hours.

In short, Chapter 16 is up in the air, and where it will fall is uncertain, but I am guessing it will arrive sometime around next Sunday or Monday, depending on the situation.

  • 04.18.2005 12:14 AM PDT
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.....?

Mr. C, while that post was quite entertaining, and an interesting mixture of imaginative writing and weird comments, I'd have to say that I speak for everyone here when I say, GET SOME SLEEP!

You've done enough, judging from the flood of new comments on other people's threads, you have done a fair share of reading, and the fact that you did it all in one night is insane.

So, just lie back, get some shuteye, and try not to let all the things that can go wrong in life creep up on you.

  • 04.18.2005 2:25 AM PDT
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Posted by: Konoka_chan
.....?

Mr. C, while that post was quite entertaining, and an interesting mixture of imaginative writing and weird comments, I'd have to say that I speak for everyone here when I say, GET SOME SLEEP!

You've done enough, judging from the flood of new comments on other people's threads, you have done a fair share of reading, and the fact that you did it all in one night is insane.

So, just lie back, get some shuteye, and try not to let all the things that can go wrong in life creep up on you.


Amen!

  • 04.18.2005 3:49 AM PDT
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I think that deserves to go in the random ramblings from your signature.

Did u get my pm about my new chapter mr clarke?

[Edited on 4/18/2005]

  • 04.18.2005 4:31 AM PDT