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This topic has moved here: Subject: Caption 2: (a movie!) From an old Halo Loc test pass
  • Subject: Caption 2: (a movie!) From an old Halo Loc test pass
Subject: Caption 2: (a movie!) From an old Halo Loc test pass
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*MC ease drops on the unsuspecting jackals as they discuss various things.*

Jackal 1: Hey Todd, what do you want for lunch?

Jackal 2: I don't know? Not really that hungry.

Jackal 1: Really? You haven't eaten in days.

Jackal 2: Really slow metabalism.

Jackal 1: Oooooh. Hump....Hey, look what I can do with my thumb!

Jackal 2: Your really bored aren't you?

Jackal 1: I can't help it dude, we've been stuck here for over 3 hours waiting on some guy described to be Gumby and I really got to find something to do or I'm going to explode.

Master C.: *whispers to himself* Oh you have no idea.

*throws grenade**it lands in front of Jackal 1's feet*

Jackal 1: Are you sure your not hungry?

Jackal 2: YES I'M SU----*KA-BOOM!!*

*MC meets up with other Marines*

Master C.: Do I look like Gumby to you?

  • 04.21.2004 11:56 AM PDT
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Announcer says quietly: "Oooh, this looks like the same split he had yesterday. He needs to just shave to the right to pick up the spare. Good approach... and ... YES!!! He picks it up!!"

  • 04.21.2004 1:02 PM PDT
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My teacher says, "Everytime a grenade explodes, a Jackal gets its wings."

  • 04.21.2004 1:20 PM PDT
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Caption: Did he just say "I farted?"

  • 04.21.2004 1:31 PM PDT
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MC: *After killing everyone* What did he say? ¡No dispare! ¡Soy un espía amistoso! What does that mean? Oh well, not like it's gonna cost us the war...

  • 04.21.2004 3:32 PM PDT
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and so my friends, that is how the jackals evolved into birds.

  • 04.21.2004 6:23 PM PDT
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(Jackals all standing around)

:common man tell the storyyyyyy
:nah i dunno
:what story?
:The Master Chief
:the what?
:you mean you havnt heard?
:see you gotta tell them to
:alright alright...see the master chief is this super human. you can blast him all you want and somehow he keeps on comming. some who have survived even say he moves with lighting speed and cant jump twice as high as any other being. youll just be sitting around, just another normal day, and BOOM outa nowhere, masterchief is blasting off your arms and legs and leave you barely alive completely helpless.
:no way
:oh yea and I used to be a hunter
:no its true, they say....

(master cheif approaching)
:hey uhh anyone else see that?
:see what
:i swear i saw something right over there...
(BOOM)
(limless grunt flying through the air)
:themasterchief!!! (in ancient gruntish)

  • 04.21.2004 7:53 PM PDT
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-hey guys, some elite told me about this freak show calld a spartan that can slaughter as many of us without getting hurt
-haha, what have you been smoking
-dude, he's been smoking something he found over there
-what are you talking about i'm not smoking anything, cept for many that marine's cigerates we stole
(master chield approaches)
-I mean i'll share the stuff with you guys....
-give me one of tho....what the..!!
BOOM
(masterchief) smoke that jackassckles
(marine) I TOLD YA THEY COULD FLY
(marine2)dude, that was my nade....

  • 04.21.2004 9:24 PM PDT
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Who said hide and go seek wasn't fun anymore??

  • 04.22.2004 12:03 AM PDT
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Jackal: Hey! Let's play 'Spin the Grenade'!!!

BOOM!!

Grunt: Aw man...it landed on me!!

  • 04.22.2004 1:05 AM PDT
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a granade is kool but try driving your warthog over the hill and onto that mob of weakling jackals

  • 04.22.2004 2:17 AM PDT
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ONE OF THE JACKALS WITH A BLUE SHEILD: stupid human he just sat there while we shot at him...

JACKAL WITH THE YELLOW SHEILD: ha ha yeah, he even didnt even try to throw any of his gernades at us.... oh crap

  • 04.22.2004 3:41 AM PDT
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The Master Chief collects his instruments of war and proceeds to stealthly approach his enemies. Meanwhile, inside the circle of unsuspecting Covenant....

Jackal 1: "Look at him, gold-shield-wearing, spikey-haired, good-for-nothing Grunt. My god, hes as dirty as the contaminated Mexican soil that he was bred on! He doesnt even speak English."
Jackal 2: "Why does Bravo Squad always get stuck with illegal aliens!?"
Jackal 3: "You better -blam!-can that blasphemy, soldier; you know as well as I do that Bungie created all Jackals equal. Far as I'm concerned, hes my brother... my smelly, grotesquely ugly, ew, but close, yes, very close brother." (Smiles at the Spanish Jackal, but his smile quickly and rudely fades as a queasy feeling overwhelms his stomach due to the extreme extent of the Spanish Jackal's ugliness.) "Yuck!"
Jackal 1: "Since you two are so close, ha ha, why don't you give him a great big brotherly hug, ha ha ha!"
Jackal 3: "Gawd damn, touch him!? Boy, have you gone crazy!? You keep talking like that, and you're gonna make all of us lose our lunch!"
Jackal 2: "Speaking of which, I'm hungry... anyone have any cash for a Double Big Mac. Yeah, i was planning on stopping at McDonald's when we come to Earth. I mean, before we glass the planet, that is, heh heh. You know I'm lovin' it!"
Jackal 3: "You've gone and went straight stupid, haven't you, son! You know that if you step foot on Earth, your ass is the first thing getting glassed. Your are right about one thing: we could use something to eat, but I'm flat broke, too."
Jackal 1: "Guys, pipe down, i think Goldie Locks has something to say"
Spanish Jackal: "Yo tengo no deniro"
Jackal 1: "Well, what a surprise, the poverty-stricken border-jumper has no money! So, if we are all broke, how are we gonna pay the munchies?"

(Frag Grenade lands at the feet of Jackal 2)

Jackal 2: "Guys, we are in luck. I just found one of them new Canadian $100 coins!" (points at the grenade)
Jackal 3: "Oh, that's great... great if y'all are interested in a large Ice Capp from Tim Hortons! Fool, inflation is a beast in Canada! That coin is worth less than six Pesos!"
Jackal 1: "Which is more money than Urine-Shield over here has seen in his whole life. Besides, the Timmy Ho's next to the Map Room doesn't open for another week, at lot of good that is gonna do us."
Jackal 2: "Oh my damn, is inflation really that bad in Cana-"

(Explosion)

Master Chief (to himself): "Yeah, the inflation is" (puts his pinky finger to his lips) "quite lethal!"

  • 04.22.2004 3:57 AM PDT
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hmmmmm that rock looks just like a gernaBOOM

  • 04.22.2004 4:51 AM PDT
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cenobite, nice reference to Reservoir Dogs, that cafe scene is hilarious.

  • 04.22.2004 5:20 AM PDT
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Jackal1: Hey guys, isn't that Elite?

Jackal2: yeah, HEY ELY, OVER HERE!!

Jackal1: I think he heard us.

Jackal3: Whats that in his hand, it looks like a ball...

--MC throws the grenade--

Jackal4: Wait, thats not a ball, its a....

Jackal4: ...GRENADE!!!

BOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MC: Don't call me Ely...

  • 04.22.2004 7:36 AM PDT

Jackal: I gotta joke. What's brown and sticky?
Other Jackals remain silent.
Jackal: A STICK!
Other Jackals still remain silent.

-ENTER "THE GRENADE"-

(Explosion)

The End

  • 04.22.2004 11:05 AM PDT
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hey sawnose, can you try to keep them to pics in the future???cosmy crappy connection couldnt download anything if ti wanted to... or watch it for that matter... my answer was an educated guess, based on what others were saying...

  • 04.22.2004 1:17 PM PDT
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Jack1: Hey you guys guess what I just heard!!!

All the Jacks": What? What is it?

Jack1: I heard that a mutant human that wears a huge green suit of armor and that moves at lightning speed is going around killing us Jackals mercilesly. Oh and he weighs like two tons and can drive any vehicle and use any weapon.

All the Jacks:YEAH RIGHT!!HAHAHAHAHAHA!! AAAAAAHAHAHAHA!!

<after laughter died down>

Jackal2: Man this one is better than that story of the flying grenades HAHAAHAHAHA.

All the Jackals:YEAH HAHAHAHAHA.

<grenade falls>

<Jackals look and see the MC by the log>

Jack1: See?

Jack2:Shi----

  • 04.22.2004 1:24 PM PDT
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MC: That's what you get for talking about 'Killzone' behind my back!!!

-or-

MC: That's what you get for talking smack about Bungie.

-or (just for kicks)-

MC: That's what you get for talking smack about Sawnose behind his back. He even chose to replay this vindictive event over the internet on the most popular site on the web. If that isn't sweet, bloody revenge, I don't know what is!!!

  • 04.22.2004 2:14 PM PDT
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Sawnose... The voice in the end is not a Jackal's voice, it's actually one of the Grunts further up the hill.
It was in English, even though the HUD displays Spanish, and he says "Where was it?" Which is what Grunts sometimes say, among other things, if the Master Chief is lurking near by. I know this because I've only owned the game for THREE FRICKIN' YEARS!!!
I do have one question for Bungie: why are the Grunts the only Covenant that speak English?

  • 04.22.2004 3:15 PM PDT
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DWilly. i think you have successfully missed the point on this topic, utterly and completely.

  • 04.22.2004 8:02 PM PDT
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DWilly the grunts dont speak english or spanish. Its the MC's translator that does that.

  • 04.22.2004 8:09 PM PDT
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When Jackal nature-activists meet in forests designated for military use and clearcutting...

  • 04.22.2004 8:30 PM PDT
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Random Jackal: Okay, who had the spicy chalopa?

  • 04.22.2004 10:48 PM PDT