- last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT
For a long time now I have gone under many ruses. Due to the belligerent and relentless questioning of Yoozel and Frankie I have decided to finally reveal the truth. I made a sort of prequel to this thread here. I did not lie: my picture is indeed there. The rest of them are pictures of friends of mine. Some of my friends are aware of said thread, and find it highly amusing. Others are living in a state of blissful ignorance, mainly because they haven’t logged onto AIM in a while.
The First and Largest Lie: I am not female, and I am not a robot. I am, however, 86.477% male (+/- a few, depending on the volume of chick-flicks I have watched recently).
From this thread, posted at 5/24/2004 5:07 PM.
Anyway. I have long hair, and when combined with the genetics I got from my mother, I become a sort of "girly-man." You would not believe how many times I've been told I am "pretty." (all in jest, of course (I hope))
It would be great if I were a tranny of sorts, but considering how Frankie hasn't returned my marriage proposals, I have no real reason to be.
I said that before the lies and rumors started. That was a direct admittance of my masculinity, yet for some reason it was never noticed. Perhaps I was the only person who had ever read the thread entirely.
Now for the FAQ:
“Out of the eight, which one is you?”
I am number six.
“Are you really from Iceland?”
Nope. That was a sarcastic lie I started at about the same time I started the girl thing.
“Does that mean that your father doesn’t really work in an ice cube mine?”
Yes, sorry.
“… =(“
Don’t be sad.
“Are you really an English teacher?”
No. I am not an actual English teacher.
“How old are you really? Did you lie about that, too?”
Yes, I did lie about that by one year. I am seventeen, not eighteen. I will be turning eighteen on December first, too late for the upcoming election.
“Why did you do all this? Why the lies?”
Hmm. To explain that I’ll first explain my time at bungie.net.
I am a Halo fan, who, when bored one weekend, stumbled upon the bungie.net site. I found Frankie’s weekly updates and read them all; I simply loved them. It wasn’t because of the amazingly cool Halo 2 development, but because of the hilarious and entertaining way the updates were written. I saw that there was an opportunity to discuss it with Frankie on the forums, so I signed up.
Frankie was of course busy like most developers are. I was used to that, though, from the old Sony Online Entertainment Star Wars Galaxies forums. So, I gave up hope of ever being able to speak with Frankie and tried out the forums.
I was disappointed. The forums to me seemed like a terrible, senile place, filled with fan-boys and, to quote myself then, ‘morons.’ After one of my very first posts I got shot down by Shishka for some political-thing, which I considered unjust because I was not familiar with the forum rules.
I started trolling. I know from experience that ‘female’ trolls can get away with so much more, so, to help me I created that little fib. I would verbally belittle other posters, and generally cause trouble. Then, to help protect myself I became friends with the moderators.
I come from a forum devoted to trolling other forums. We attack en masse, and I was sort of scouting out the area. If you think my ways of verbally pwning people were harsh, then imagine 15 more posters all with the same ruthlessly cruel sarcasm. I was ‘scouting’ out Bungie.net and getting ready to rally the forum and attack.
Then, in a strange twist of fate, I began to like the mods. I began to like some of the posters at Bungie.net. I saw that there were people I didn’t like, yes, but there were also a lot of people I did like. I started to become friends with them.
So, I gradually grew out of the intellectual pwning game. I decided to become an actual good poster on the forums, which I’ve been trying to do (and I’m sure some of you have noticed). I had already surrounded myself with lies, so it was too late to take them back now. I thought that people would be hurt and would feel ‘betrayed’ if they had found out I had lied. It was only after I had spoken to Frankie and realized that no one would really care, that I considered coming clean. Combine that with he, Zoe’s and Yoozel’s curiosity, and you have this thread.
“So you’re going to be honest and good now?”
For the most part, yes.
“So if you pretended to be a girl, how much about your real life did you lie about as well?”
A lot of what I had said about my real life was true, except that I reversed my friend’s genders. If I said, ‘I’m going on a date tomorrow with a guy,’ that really meant that I was going on a date tomorrow with a girl. It was at this point that I wanted to be me, but I didn’t know how to really start, so I tried to talk about me by fibbing as little as possible.
“So you’re that dude. Do you have any more pictures?”
Yes, a lot actually.
A bit from my infamous drunken posting on www.Christianforums.com. This one does not contain nudity, and I think it was taken before I started to get really drunk.
A picture of my hair.
Ninja Obbi.
Why I seem to be everywhere.
Me the morning after a sleepless night of driving back from Disneyland in the back of the bus with a female member of band.
Me next to goofy. (I’ll explain the “I *heart* Estey” story some other time. It’s a really good one, so be sure to remind me about it.)
“In your “A picture of my hair” photo you look like you’re wearing makeup. Are you?”
No. I’m naturally beautiful.
“Wait… are you…”
I’m straight.
“Oh… *pouts*”
I know. I’m sorry. =(
[Edited on 6/25/2004 1:51:14 PM]