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Subject: I'b bord as hell so its up to you to fix it by telling stories ...
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Posted by: HELP MEEEEEE
Posted by: Terminus
My sister stuck a prezel up her nose and we had to go to the emergency room to get it out.
OK IM SORRY BUT IM SO TIRED OF THE HOSPITAL STORIES! i gve u 2 because im bord of hospital stuff 2 it wasnt funny and 3 it wasnt good

Ok then one time I locked my self out of the house for 9 hours.

  • 07.06.2004 6:37 PM PDT
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I'm old... compared to most of the brats on here that sound like girls.

Yea oblviously im back and i have something for you guys to read rate it on coolness and goodness not on funny

it has noo meaning its just cool words put together


The winged beast brakes from the cage of flesh to spread and stretch its cramped wings. It takes flight. Keen eyesight seeking out any movement in the land below, irises flexing to the subtle variations of the dark. Flying silently through the darkness, suddenly it catches sight of its pray. Such beauty not common among the race of man and soon to be more uncommon. It dives, not a sound heard save for the one scream of its pray before there is nothing more, except the silence of the cold unforgiving night. It then retreats to home to reform into that which it despises, man.

  • 07.06.2004 6:39 PM PDT
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I'm old... compared to most of the brats on here that sound like girls.

y dont u have a secret key for those situations? I DO, NEXT 9 hours holy crap i woulda broken a window or something

tell me what u did for those 9 hrs and then I'll rate it

  • 07.06.2004 6:40 PM PDT
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I stuck two crayons up each nostril and one time I swallowed... 56 cents...

  • 07.06.2004 6:41 PM PDT
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I'm old... compared to most of the brats on here that sound like girls.

enough with the stuff that went in u people I WANT FUL FLEDGE STORIES like the one time that one thing happend and because it happend all this other stuff happend

I GIVE 1 BECCAUSE ITS JUST 1 OF MANY OF THE SAME THINGS

  • 07.06.2004 6:45 PM PDT
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I'm old... compared to most of the brats on here that sound like girls.

wow im sorry i'll be nicer and now its time FOR A FUNNY (and very offencive story) BY ME sorry if ur offended

Satan and I, see he's really a she and hot literally and figuratively. Been friends for a long tiiiiiiiiiiime, any way so around 100 or so years ago I can’t remember its been a while, we where talking about what we should do with all those damn guardian angles and one thing lead to another. She didn’t have and condoms, which seemed odd for someone who is reasonably all-powerful, but she said “Eh I’m the devil it doesn’t matter” and so we made rough satanic sex like no other the moans echoed throughout hell for weeks. Then in about one day we had little baby Hitler. She has kids really fast for some reason. Well she and I didn’t want him because I didn’t have time because of my work at the church and she didn’t have time because she had to monitor the endless torment of all deserving souls so we sent him to Earth. HUGE MISTAKE! To keep me from talking she gave me the power of instant rebirth. I have to relearn everything but its kind of in there, so it’s easy to relearn, she also let me keep my memories of her and if I ever need out of a jam she gave me this number (666) 13-SATAN.

  • 07.06.2004 6:53 PM PDT

It was a cold day near the southern base in Blood Gulch. Cortana and I were relaxing over a game of Go Fish, WHEN OUT OF NO WHERE 700 BANSHEES CAME FLYING IN!!! I GRABED MY SPARTAN LASER AND LET HELL REIGN DOWN UPON THEM. I HOPPED IN THE NEAREST WARTHOG AND TOLD CORTANA TO GET IN.

I remember one time when i was like 5 i was playing in a little inflateable kiddy pool. Now my pops says "Who wants to get me a beer" and being the sweet little angel I am, I offer. I run upstaris soaking wet and grab the beer can. Now on my way down the staris the can slips out. It falls all the way down the stairs, but dosnt explode. Now I hand the can to my dad, and he opens it. It covers him in beer. dunno but the naivity thing has to be worth SOMETHING there...

  • 07.06.2004 8:22 PM PDT
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I'm old... compared to most of the brats on here that sound like girls.

ok i did like that one because it was an unintentional prank i GIVE U A .... 6.7!!!!!!

  • 07.06.2004 8:26 PM PDT
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I'm old... compared to most of the brats on here that sound like girls.

but u get a 10 as a person because ur the 1st person in 2hrs to say something

  • 07.06.2004 8:27 PM PDT
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Well one day i went to the mall. And out of the blue there was this large group of monkeys, armed with explosive bananas. They were trying to force the owner of GameStop to preorder the monkey's all of the Halo 2- Special edition copies in the world. Even the hispanic versions. The US government, led by George Bush, Ordered the arms facility to launch 3 Nukes at the mall. Killing everyone inside, but saving all the Halo 2 copies in the world. Unfortunately I was a member of FOXTROT ( from metal gear solid for all those unfamiliar) And I called them in and said: "I'll take care of this mess" And I took a vantage point with my PSG-1 behind one of those miniature trees. I scanned around the doorway of GameStop and shot the 2 guard monkeys in the head. The guards were gone but there was still the large,steel, locked door. That was no problem because I loaded the door with SEMTEX. The door vigorously blew open. \
There were 5 monkeys at the computer, ordering the Halo 2's. But I blew them away with an AR before they could reach there exploding bananas. Then I rushed in with my katana. There were 2 doors. The one behind the counter, and the back door. I jumped behind the counter and sliced through the door. Monkeys were throwing bananas like monkeys. I kept deflecting bananas back at the monkeys and blowing them up. It turns out the monkeys were trying to steal unlimited X box live action! But I stopped that.
Then there was the deal with the back door. I sliced it down before I knew it was unlocked.(actually I knew it was unlocked, but I was trying to make it look dramatic for what happened next.) Inside was a dark room with nothing inside. Well, except the Owners of GameStop and a very large supermonkey.
First I cut the owners free. Then I walked up to the large monkey. Suddenly the monkey fell to pieces. Revealing that it was just a suit with a man inside.The man had a suit of armour equipped with 2 robotic testi... sorry. Tentacles. The man turned around and he looked familiar.
It was my FATHER!!! I said. "DAD!? your the one behind all of this!?" He made a lame (yet cool) excuse. "But son, I was doing all of this for you."
"You mean, you trained a bunch of monkeys to throw explosive bananas, so you could take GameStop hostage, so you could get me unlimited Xbox live and all the copies of Halo 2 in the world. For me?..(yes) But you are doing evil while trying to impress me. I can't allow that!" So my father did not like me denying his offer and he grabbed me with his TENTacles and threw me through the cieling. This scene seemed familiar. So I drew my katana.
We were engaged in an amazing sword battle on the roof of the mall. Until he swung a verticle attack and I dodged left, spun around and sliced my sword through his lower back. Blood sprayed over the roof. And he fell backwards next to a statue of our towns' most famous celebrity (Michael Jackson)
The police showed up and spoke to me about how I killed many evil monkeys, and my father. I said to one of the officers..."I really appreciated him trying to help me out but... I dont think it was necesary to take over GameStop with a large group of evil monkeys, and try to kill me in the end."

THE END

Moral of the story: Dont let your parents try to take over GameStop and try to get unlimited X box live and all the Halo 2 copies in the world, by using a large group of evil monkeys that throw explosive bananas. Because it wont work if you are a member of FOXTROT.

that is one hell of a story. I hope the ending sounds kinda familiar!

  • 07.06.2004 8:36 PM PDT
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I'm old... compared to most of the brats on here that sound like girls.

no the ending isnt familiar, but!!!!!! it was long and slightly funny so i give u a hmm 9 yea thats bout right GOOD JOB UR WINNING SO FAR have a um... (v")>-~ kriby on pot, a Ov^vO monster and HOMER! (8^( l ) "doh!"

[Edited on 7/6/2004 9:06:31 PM]

  • 07.06.2004 9:05 PM PDT
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Onse Upon an time. i coodnt spel 4 s#!t and i rote a goood stoury first then ruined my lead in an storee contest and den rote a storee that caam after my good story. Butt da sekond storee had teribal spellin and it gots a 9.9 ( 9.9 plees) and da creeater had a larj boost of confidans in his spelin ablitities.


Hmmmmmm. I did invent chicken nuggets did'nt I?

  • 07.06.2004 9:22 PM PDT
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I'm old... compared to most of the brats on here that sound like girls.

no u didnt invent the chicken nugget and i give u not a 9.9 i give u a 9

  • 07.07.2004 4:46 PM PDT
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"Immersion is playing Half-Life and not noticing your house is burning down."- Paul Barnett

The most awesome thing ever!

a guy walked up to my family in Toronto and told us he loved us.

  • 07.07.2004 6:01 PM PDT
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y dont u have a secret key for those situations? I DO, NEXT 9 hours holy crap i woulda broken a window or something

tell me what u did for those 9 hrs and then I'll rate it


I locked my self out once and broke a window to get in. I cut up my hand and got blood every where. Kinda sucked really.......

  • 07.07.2004 6:04 PM PDT
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I'm old... compared to most of the brats on here that sound like girls.

Posted by: lieut_pat
a guy walked up to my family in Toronto and told us he loved us.
PROBABLY DRUNK i give u a 4 im in a good mood

  • 07.07.2004 6:33 PM PDT
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I'm old... compared to most of the brats on here that sound like girls.

Posted by: Helljumper76
y dont u have a secret key for those situations? I DO, NEXT 9 hours holy crap i woulda broken a window or something

tell me what u did for those 9 hrs and then I'll rate it


I locked my self out once and broke a window to get in. I cut up my hand and got blood every where. Kinda sucked really.......
dude have u seen NO MOVIES rap ur hand in a -blam!- shirt belt pants anything god ur not to bright i give u 6 for stupid funniness not to be insulting or anything

but good thinking breaking a window very "me"

  • 07.07.2004 6:35 PM PDT
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I'm old... compared to most of the brats on here that sound like girls.

i think i might had multipul personalities

  • 07.07.2004 6:51 PM PDT

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