- soulguard
- |
- Exalted Mythic Member
Glad you all enjoyed it, and long time no see LE glad to 'see' you.
Like the good, there must be bad and I'm glad you are all seeing the 'bad' (or at least finally telling me about it LOL). As I expected, this stage was going to be the hardest to follow considering all the trouble I've had with wrapping up the story. My brain, it would seem, is so full of details about the characters that I managed to completely overlook certain things.
However the details with the battle (Eric and company stepping out) got lost in the descriptions as well, and it can seem very fantasy-ish, and totally unlike anything the Black Ops (or any sane troopers) would do. But my thinking on that was this: they had no "real" cover to defend from, their mission was to hold the zone no matter what, the jackhammers had caused enough confusion that Eric could reform a second line a few feet out from the heavy weapons (turret guns, scorpions and hogs). Essentially, Eric saw his life as forfeit:
Eric looked down the line, ignoring the plasma rounds that buzzed across his shoulder and watched as three marines buried their heads in the sand; as if that would help. He then looked to Rose and Melanie as they lay on their stomachs, gazing down the scopes of their BR55 rifles. Rose showed no sign of nervousness, unless she was hiding it, and Melanie was rolling two frag grenades in her left hand, anxious to face off against the covie bastards. More and more nervous screams rolled down the line as marines fired randomly at the wall of jackal shields.
...
“Fire at will!” Eric screamed at the top of his lungs. He stepped forward, beyond the edge of the constantly firing tanks, and let loose a triple burst of hot lead. The random marine fire turned into a constant onslaught of human firepower. Stationary turrets drummed their successive beats and sniper rounds snapped constantly. Eric hadn’t noticed it but he had taken four steps toward the covenant charge. “Meet them head on.” Eric thought to himself as he fired. He took another short step forward, lowering his height in a crouch walk, and out of the corner of his left eye he could see another camouflaged Black Op uniform stepping ahead of the line.
...
Eric yelled back as the Covenant forces closed in to twenty yards, “Marines, cover the turrets and tanks. ODST, step up and get some!” The roar that followed was deafening. One hundred and twenty ODST stepped out of line, leveled their guns and fired into the advancing wave of brutes and jackals. Their lives were forfeit, and if the legendary Eric Raynord was going to take on the Covenant, then so were they.
As you can see... yeah, out of the norm for basic military tactics but that also falls on my shoulders as not clearly explainning why... Eric in some way, wanted to create a second line to protect the heavy artillery, and give them more time. Advancing a few soldiers would be the only way and that second line did its job, thanks in most part to the Mirratord. Oh well, moving on.
As for Eric dieing... oh my, you never know. But again, there are things in the story that will be cleared up once I have the whole story in my lap and I can edit the hell out of it. For all of you that like the story now (even with all of its holes, GPS, confusion, and weak chapters) you'll be extremelly happy with the re-editted version.
Things that didn't make sense will be fixed or cut, sudden characters changes will be explained or cut, more of Eric and Kim's relationship will be brought forward, cut cut cut cut cut.... and some great additions! I have a few things in store, just as a special treat for you second time readers, but all of this will be mute if you don't like... stage 28.
Next week will bring things to an end, it will be sudden, it will be drastic, it will be... sad. Unlike uberdawg (lol) I have formed a huge bond with Eric and I'll hate to see him go (however that may be). I've actually set the mood for the last battle fairly well. Some of you may HIGHLY disslike the ending, but it is my story and I have to stick with the major premise of the title and conclude the main plot. The one thing I do want you all to think about is that this story has not only been about war, but about individuals in that war. It isn't all action and explosions (very unlike Halo, I know, sue me), it's about the characters... characters you will hate or love, and hopefully it isn't because I'm a bad writer (which I am), but becuase I created such rich characters that they take a life of there own.
Well, I could go on, but I've said much more then I need to . Thanks scorp, worstpirate, uber, MG42, LE, Highland, HaloX, Prowlaz and the rest of you. Before I started this, I never thought that I had any 'talent' at all. I have a lot of work to do before I can ever think to get published, but at leat I know that my form of story telling is enjoyable. Thanks guys and gals... keep the reviews coming.
-I'm getting emotional, so I'm going to get back in bed and continue to fight this cold I caught last night.
-soulguard
PS: Narnia is good... but.. well, I may have been too excited to see it. It was really good.