Off Topic: The Flood
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Subject: Read this, it's COOL!!!
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Read this and tell me what you think. This is the first chapter in my book, The New Conflict. It IS based on Halo and takes place during Halo 2. There is a prolouge, but I didn't want to post it yet, so if your interested tell me. (its really indented but when I copy/pasted it, it didnt indent, so dont say anything about that.)


Chapter One

1500 hours, September 17, 2553 (Military Calendar)/
Earth, United States, New Los Angeles


DePascale radioed his wingman. “Dwire! Fisher’s pinned down due east. Let’s deliver some air support.”
“Roger that!” Dwire replied. They both banked left in their C290 Ravens.

Fisher fired his last few rounds in the magazine and reloaded. “Lance Corporal Stewart, this is a good time to earn your blood stripes, man that gun!”
“Which one,” Stewart asked.
“The LAAG, on the Warthog next to you, go for it!”

Stewart manned it and plowed through 15 charging Grunts. A Phantom drop ship screamed overhead. It landed about 50 yards in front of Fisher’s platoon, or at least what was left of it. His platoon was positioned up against a building, so they couldn’t be flanked, but they were a perfect target for a fuel rod gun. The Phantom unloaded five Elites and five Brutes, followed by a mix of 10 Grunts and Jackals.

“Dammit!” Fisher said as the aliens unloaded. “Sgt. Staten, hand me that Jackhammer!”

Fisher heaved the rocket launcher and fired the 102 mm round strait toward the Jackals and Grunts. The explosion sent the bastards flying. All except two Grunts, who immediately yelped, “Flee!” and continued to do so until Stewart gunned them down.

Fisher looked over to Staten and said, “I… hate… Jackals.”

He then fired the second rocket and took out three Brutes and four Elites. Then he took out the rest with his SMG. But then, two more Phantoms landed and dropped off 15 Brutes and 15 Elites, then laid down covering fire for them. Fisher cursed at them.

“Oh crap.” Fisher turned to his Marines. “We can’t hold out much longer. Give em’ hell, Marines!”

Then, like two bats out of hell, a pair of HE Anvil II missiles screamed over them and detonated amongst the first 11 Brutes, sending blood and chunks of Brute flying everywhere. Another pair of missiles struck the group of Elites, killing 10 and wounding the other 5. Fisher looked up in time to see the two C290s roar overhead and recognized their insignias. The Phantoms turned to escape but the two fighters didn’t let them get far. A missile streaked from each plane and impacted on the first ships left and right engines, sending it into the ground. They fired two more missiles, which flew into the second Phantoms troop compartment. The alien craft was engulfed in a blue-white flash. Fisher radioed DePascale. “Thanks, we needed that.”

“Anytime,” DePascale replied.

Dwire radioed DePascale. “Halifax One, I just got a transmission from Corporal Perez, he has Covenant artillery problem.”

“Roger that Halifax Two.” DePascale switched back to Fisher. “See you back at base, Fisher.”
“Thanks to you guys, you will,” he replied.

The two Ravens continued toward Perez’s position.



[Edited on 7/16/2004 12:58:04 AM]

  • 07.16.2004 12:33 AM PDT
Subject: It's cool!
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That is actually cool. I especially like the way everyone gets blown to pieces and none of the covenant bastards live.

  • 07.16.2004 1:07 AM PDT
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Thanks. Oh -blam!- I forgot, I don't have the prolouge, but I have Chapter two... sort of. I still need to edit it a little. I'll do that now.

  • 07.16.2004 1:13 AM PDT
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You see, I have writen up to Chapter 5, but I've only typed 1 and 2. Three and the prolouge got lost in my floppy disk somehow.

  • 07.16.2004 1:15 AM PDT
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I'm done editing Chapter 2 so here it is.


Chapter Two

Forerunner home world Scrysis


After about one year of floating and sputtering to himself, 343 Guilty Spark finally arrived at the Forerunner home world of Scrysis. He shot through the atmosphere like it was nothing. This wasn’t the original home world. The Forerunners that lived here were renegades. They were all that was left. Later the Monitor held a meeting with the Council.

The Monitor floated above a small pedestal as he spoke. “I have found something quite valuable, Creator. There is also a problem.” The Head Master of the Council glared at Guilty Spark.

He, like all others of the Forerunner race, was about seven feet tall and had a muscular body. The Council members wore gray robes while the Head Master wore a jet-black robe with blood red trim. The Head Master spoke in a scratchy voice. “Why aren’t you at your installation? This had better be good.”

“Oh it is,” the Monitor replied cheerfully. “But first the problem: the Reclaimer has betrayed us. Now for the good news. I have…”
“Silence!” the Head Master shouted. “You think we weren’t monitoring the installation? You let it get destroyed. Why didn’t you stop this from happening? The Flood could have escaped! There would be no stopping them!”

“They didn’t escape, Creator. They were trying to repair and use the ship that caused the installation to explode. The Reclaimer betrayed us and caused the ship to explode. Also a human named Matt Dwire tried to kill me,” the Monitor explained. “The nerve of him,” he said quietly to himself.

The Head Master stared in anger at 343 Guilty Spark. “Where’s the good news in all this?”

“Sorry, Creator. I have found valuable information: the location of these humans’ home world, Earth. And their history, weapons research, everything about them,” the Monitor said. “I’ll send you the information now. It is all quite interesting, you know. I have searched through almost all of it. The categorization was quite…”

The Monitor hit the floor with a loud clang! His characteristic blue glow flickered then faded. Three seconds later he exploded in a ball of blue flame. Metal shrapnel flew in every direction, making the Forerunners’ shields flare a bright blue, then disappear. They had extracted the information before Guilty Spark even mentioned it.

The Head Master spoke to the rest of the Council members as Sentinels cleaned up the pieces of 343 Guilty Spark. “We are declaring war on these humans. If one of them can destroy an entire ring by himself, a whole planet is dangerous to our survival as a race. We will destroy the entire planet. We cannot just build a ring and hold them there. Gather all of the troops for war. These… humans… will pay for their mistake.”


  • 07.16.2004 1:46 AM PDT
Subject: If you were wondering...
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In case you were thinking, "Hey, where's the Chief?" yes he is in the book, just not in the first or second chapter. He comes in the 5th chapter. And whether you like it or not, there will be other Spartans. Linda, Fred, and... was it Will that was still alive at the end of First Strike? Anyway you get the idea. I'll try to have chapter 3 by tommorow night.

[Edited on 7/16/2004 11:29:22 PM]

  • 07.16.2004 11:27 PM PDT
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thats good that is

  • 07.17.2004 7:07 AM PDT
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Thanks. Aren't you all glad to see the Monitor dead? Finnaly!

  • 07.17.2004 10:33 AM PDT
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That is so -blam!-!

  • 07.17.2004 10:34 AM PDT
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I know the Monitor's -blam!-, that's why he died.

  • 07.17.2004 10:52 AM PDT

Posted by: Jnice
That is so -blam!-!


Jnice, I've noticed you've turned from a good poster to an arrogant ass lately. All I have to ask is "why"?

[Edited on 7/17/2004 10:56:15 AM]

  • 07.17.2004 10:55 AM PDT

With B.B. gone, the passion of Bungie.net has lessened.

... I'm not sure that "why" is answerable, in this case, Barron...

  • 07.17.2004 11:05 AM PDT
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Posted by: Jnice
That is so -blam!-!
Guess I forgot to say if you don't like it and have the itching urge to put a negative comment down, at least explain why you don't like it so I don't just sit there and wonder "What the hell's that persons problem?"

  • 07.17.2004 11:11 AM PDT
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So Barron and Hulud, waht do you think of it so far?

  • 07.17.2004 11:27 AM PDT
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I especially liked chapter 1- Great action.

My criticisms (meant only to help) are that you aren't very descriptive and you haven't really developed any characters. People won't get into the book if there aren't characters they can feel.

But the part about not being very descriptive- I think it worked to your advantage in the first chapter. You captured the exhilaration and rush of battle without lingering on details. It makes for a more action packed scene.

  • 07.17.2004 11:33 AM PDT
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Well you see, the three main characters were in my friends book. This is a sequal to my friends book. If you want to know about his books, PM m43sniperrifle, that's him.

  • 07.17.2004 11:43 AM PDT
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Posted by: Halifax118
Well you see, the three main characters were in my friends book. This is a sequal to my friends book. If you want to know about his books, PM m43sniperrifle, that's him.


Oh... Well you should have said so!

  • 07.17.2004 11:49 AM PDT

With B.B. gone, the passion of Bungie.net has lessened.

Pretty good. I've seen better, but I've seen much worse as well.

  • 07.17.2004 11:56 AM PDT
Subject: It's cool!
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Are you really going to publish that? If you do ill buy it. it was wonderfully written. id like to get a job as a game journalist in something like game informer or a video game website. I think my reviews are nicely written, but there, my freind, was nice ass writing, and I commend you for it.

  • 07.17.2004 12:05 PM PDT
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...Those chapters are a little short. No offense, they're good, but if you publish a book with chapters that short, the book'll be no longer than the average Dr. Suess book, probably only occupying about 20 minutes fo someone's time. Real novels should take at least two weeks to read. But, like I said, those chapters are good. I'd buy the book.


...That is unless there's like 90 chapters.

[Edited on 7/17/2004 12:15:37 PM]

  • 07.17.2004 12:13 PM PDT

It was a cold day near the southern base in Blood Gulch. Cortana and I were relaxing over a game of Go Fish, WHEN OUT OF NO WHERE 700 BANSHEES CAME FLYING IN!!! I GRABED MY SPARTAN LASER AND LET HELL REIGN DOWN UPON THEM. I HOPPED IN THE NEAREST WARTHOG AND TOLD CORTANA TO GET IN.

Real novels take you two weeks? I can finish a good 500 page novel in two days. w/e. It really is great writing though. Really enjoyed it.

[constructive_critisism] Some thing that could be worked on, however, was the fact that you sometimes use the same word to describe something two sentances in a row, like

They were trying to repair and use the ship that caused the installation to explode. The Reclaimer betrayed us and caused the ship to explode.

I wouldnt use explode in both sentances. Just paste it on word and look at the synonyms (I think that it. The thesaurus) [/constructive_critisism]

Otherwise, its awesome. Great job.

[Edited on 7/17/2004 12:39:00 PM]

  • 07.17.2004 12:38 PM PDT
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Why the hell would they want to go to the trouble to invade L.A? Unless there is a base there or something, there certainly isn't anything there the covenant would be remotely interested in, unless they're interested in street ganags or traffic Jams. It would be easier for them to just blow it up.

But still very good writing. Lots of guns.

[Edited on 7/17/2004 12:54:08 PM]

  • 07.17.2004 12:53 PM PDT
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That's awsome I like the way of your military language!
See yall.




P.S. I wish I could write like that!

  • 07.17.2004 1:22 PM PDT
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Posted by: Micro Soldier
Are you really going to publish that? If you do ill buy it. it was wonderfully written. id like to get a job as a game journalist in something like game informer or a video game website. I think my reviews are nicely written, but there, my freind, was nice ass writing, and I commend you for it.
Yes I will, once m43 publishes his. But he's waiting for me to finish mine to edit his. He will publish them eventually.

  • 07.17.2004 7:25 PM PDT
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Patience, GreenChief, patience. The chapters do get longer. And you must be a slow reader. I finished The Fall of Reach in... umm... 4 days. Or maybe it was 5.

[Edited on 7/17/2004 7:37:09 PM]

  • 07.17.2004 7:28 PM PDT

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