Off Topic: The Flood
This topic has moved here: Subject: Flood Funny Sayings. (Under construction)
  • Subject: Flood Funny Sayings. (Under construction)
Subject: Flood Funny Sayings. (Under construction)

Posted by: petitminou
Posted by: dthunda
Let me be frank.

You aren't in love with her. You're obsessed with her. And I already know what's going to happen. You'll start getting close to her, and she'll try to push you away. Eventually, you'll slip up and offend her, then it'll all go downhill from there, and eventually, she'll stop talking to you.


Your name isn't Frank.


Posted by: ScOpEbOy
Posted by: Primoboy360
If you didnt like her right away theres someone better for you


What? Fail imo, you dont judge a book by its cover, or fall in love with one because it has a badass cover, you have to get to know the book, love the book, be the book. Once you have read a book then you can "Love" it.

What he hell am i talking about?


Posted by: MasterBeef12345
Posted by: TheDemonicBird O
And on the left side of the jeep you can see a troll. These primative creatures feel some unexplained urge to act like stupid -blam!-ing -blam!-s for the sole purpose of provoking others. They aren't a very advanced species and their idiotic ways seem to baffle scientists. A discrace to evolution is what they are. Somewhere Charles Darwin is rolling over in his grave.
Oh [-blam!-] the troll heard us. Dont worry though, they are relatively harmless. Sometimes they are even funny. However, the troll on the left is just a dumbass. Now then, on to the man-eating hippo exhibit


Posted by: BLIB
Oh, jizzsticks.
I can't find the USB drive the file's in.


Posted by: Member128
Posted by: a rabid snail
-blam!-.

How poetic.


Posted by: PyschicDeth
It probably has to do with what-handedness


Posted by: T B1ZZL3
JESUS CHRIST WILL SOMEBODY MOTHER FUDGING BAN HIM!


Posted by: ActualTuoDecaps
Posted by: IFAIL

Yeah you do.

Posted by: Tibetz
Posted by: Longsword049
don't worry in two hundred years the planet will restart and we will be living in another ice age... two ice ages have been recorded.. in the 1700s was the most recent one..

global warming(climate change) is a part of a planetary cycle.. like a seson.

the planet mreleases more Co2 then all living things on it.. and plants require Co2.. this planet is tough..


do yuo even know what an Ice Age is?

we were NOT in an ice age during the days of american colonization.

Posted by: PIEMAN1212
Posted by: PIEMAN1212
Posted by: Skibur
The Deathclaw-goes-flying-into-space glitch is pretty funny, too :)

=[
I haven't killed a Deathclaw in five days. *Sniff sniff*

]I can't! My glitch is real bad, whenever I see a Deathclaw it rockets into space! I went to Old Olney, it was like a missle launching site!

Posted by: Fedilipocat
Posted by: mahspoonis2big
forum ppl r teh smrtst ppl evar!!1 there iq is liek ov3r 9000!!!!!11 ololololol

I was going to type
' IT'S OVER 9000?? '
but no, we're above that.

Posted by: Shmookies
Posted by: A Dumb Door
Posted by: Member128
Posted by: A Dumb Door
Posted by: Member128
Reported for bumping.

I was just browsing through old threads, found this, and thought I should enlighten everyone.

Reported for enlightening.

Reported for reporting.
Reported for blatant hypocrisy.

Posted by: Jiixon
It's a cookie. You should be thankful.

-Love, Microsoft.


Posted by: Engrapadora
Do you your favorite color? I under and then. Where or if very? But for! Is great shark melon!?

Posted by: dannyloomes05
List of annoying memes:

Do a barrel roll
Ending your OP with Discuss
I am 12 and what is this
???
Profit!

Posted by: Wobo Wobo
Are you, perhaps, a microwave? As my microwave does not know how to love either, I feel that you may be my microwave.

See I lost it.

Posted by: sup3rn0va13
Posted by: NoNeckin
What is this, Little Lamp Light? And TBizzle is "Princess"?

Looks like I'm going to have to move to Big Town.
I lol'd.

Posted by: T B1ZZL3
Coming out December 26th.

What a retarded release date.

Posted by: frondew
Posted by: JTaM93
It's okay, frandaw. You'll be fine...

~fran
Thank you

Jeffery
Thomas
Adam
Molly
99 red balloons
3 dead kittens.

~fron

Posted by: Tartan 118
*searches for self*

*looks in mirror*
Ah, here I am.

Posted by: Tartan 118
Posting a thread drawing attention to this was never going to help your case. Into the corner. Put the pointy hat. The one with the D on it...


Posted by: petitminou
Posted by: caution snowman
Ya..... thats a cartoon........... no thanks...


You have no imagination.


Posted by: MikeAKballin
Hahaha, late nights on the Bungie forums are one of the best things god gave us.


Posted by: HaloIsMegaKewl
Posted by: nettles
nobody asked you!!

So you're just going to blatantly ignore the answer to your original question?


Posted by: Undead project
Posted by: nettles
and this is how you deal with blunt questions?


well yes... any other suggestion?


Posted by: Kitsune88
Posted by: nettles
The only reason your all here is to mock me right?


No, but it's hard to resist.


Posted by: Unconventional
New people....
Gotta love 'em.


Posted by: Jedi 4
I'm a floodian....
Step into our territory and you will be taken away at night while you are sleeping....and you will never see daylight ever again.......YOU WILL BE OUR FOOD!!!......*crawls back into hole*


These two were a bit too long to quote here, but read them anyway.

Posted by: cheezytacos1
You fail at life my friend.


Posted by: Astinous
Posted by: darkmatter15
hey -blam!- -blam!- boy was i taking to you? go back sucking your mom huge -blam!- that was last seen -blam!- your dad in a ts -blam!- video -blam!-

Someone got rejected....


Posted by: ratekinc
Posted by: Jet Wave
Posted by: ratekinc
Why isn't me in there?

because you're at the hospital, taking care of the English teacher in a coma
But its so boring! I shot his leg, and he didn't even twitch!!! I"m not allowed to leave either, so I have to order more bullets online...


Posted by: JTaM93
Posted by: MrSpinkleswirth
Posted by: Blade
Please don't curse.


yeah, man, what the fu­ck is wrong with you? children frequent this site, you know.
My clean virgin mind has been raped.


Posted by: CHRISLY0NZ UK
Michael Jackson.

Did I just say that out loud?

Oh my...


Posted by: SGT cheesemunky
Posted by: mrT23xx
#1 Banhammer
#2 Text Wall hurt meh eyes

Do you smell banannas?


Posted by: EJTheSnail
Damn Overlord, chill. You're acting like GIR on Expert drums.


Posted by: reppin dat 802
Posted by: Duardo
fail

hehe i now know your secrets


Posted by: Shadquist405
Posted by: Caboosethedead
Unzip your pants and look down.


In all seriousness, just surf youtube.


This man wins a cookie.


Posted by: Rampancy
Hey EJ, whilst it is funny to jerk tbizzle around with this whole "will I, won't I?" mod thing, it's a bit wankerish at the same time...


Posted by: Hi Im AsyIum
Posted by: Rampancy
wankerish.

Best word ever.


Posted by: The alien guy
You're mistaken, i think. England is full of people that talk and have no action so.... maybe.


Posted by: raison d etre
Fine, I'll suck your di-

Wait, that isn't what you wanted?

Disregard.

Posted by: OMFGitzn0tButer
Posted by: s5 SnipEmo
I collect BK's :)

I'm sorry,this isn't the H3 forum.

Posted by: raison d etre
Posted by: OFearTheCircleO
Hey isn't -blam!-, but I really want to know, what makes him so hot????? Like I'll admit that a guy look goods (not -blam!-) but he isn't like so outstanding looking. I just don't understand why girls think he is so great.

It's the makeup.

Nobody thought Robert Pattinson was hot when he played Cedric Diggory in Harry Potter.

Well... I did, but that's not the point.

Posted by: Commander Santa
My favorite ride at the amusement park is the cotton candy machine.
I always get arrested though.

Posted by: GezaB
Posted by: Eleventh Sniper
E3 is boring.

It must be really hard to excite you.

Posted by: MasterBeef12345
Posted by: Fuzzy McDoodle
Dumbass got owned.
Coming from a pile of -blam!- with droppings on it, thats pretty big ownage


[Edited on 08.16.2010 10:19 PM PDT]

  • 06.27.2009 10:59 AM PDT
Subject: Flood Funny Sayings. (Under construction)

Posted by: The Blind God
I yell really loudly into the phone,"Shut the -blam!- up!!!"[/quote]In...vent...ive?

Posted by: mahspoonis2big
Posted by: T0M95
This group would do what, exactly?
Talk about our Charizards, obviously.

Posted by: Zeranual
Posted by: Sgt Creighton
ok ill make it easier to read. I do not have the limitewd addtion copy of halow wars.


OH RLY?

Posted by: Double Entendre
AMERICAN R SO DUBM.


Posted by: DomDaBomb1997
Posted by: Double Entendre
AMERICAN R SO DUMD.

I R FIXT IT!

Posted by: baseballboy565
Posted by: DomDaBomb1997
Posted by: Double Entendre
AMERICAN R SO DOME.

I R FIXT IT!


N0 I WANT FICKS ITS

Posted by: a traffic cone
Posted by: Dead Phoenix
Nothing is a reel topic!
Hour werds are vomit.
Screw his mother.
Kick you're ass!
Frog blast the vent's core blah your base.
Due a barrel...

That makes no sense what so ever.


Congrats.

Posted by: FLAMEnGIR
Posted by: Xcalber89
a


A? Why not try blank posting? Its easy.

Posted by: FLAMEnGIR
Posted by: Xcalber89
makeing


I'm sorry but I can't even respond to that.

Posted by: Fuzzy McDoodle
OH YEAH!

DOOD BAN TEH MODZ!

Posted by: Member128
Posted by: The Slayer
hate

I will ban you if you continue to spam. Just a friendly warning.

Posted by:Paddydark
1.Turn on xbox
2.Put in halo 3
3. Select matchmaking

The idoits guide to playing halo 3.

More here.

Posted by: FAO7BX
Posted by: petitminou
Posted by: massmurdr X21
this jokes are becoming extinct so please contribute by making some up or posting some you know


Your write. Let's make fun of your grammer and speling.

His what?


oh, the irony.


Posted by: EJTheSnail
Posted by: A Dumb Door
Y tu?
im eating brutes


Posted by: Shmookies
Posted by: Hi im Asylum
One of them has been eating my sunflowers..
SHUT


DOWN


EVERYTHING


Posted by: Recon Number 54
Bridges? Fishing? Or Forums?


Posted by: Cody5427
Posted by: phantompop
reserved

i think that gt is taken....jk 0.o


Posted by: Sgt Fro
You seem fruity.


Posted by: night haI 1
Posted by: A Dumb Door
Transformafailitus.
Dude. Best. Word. Ever.


Posted by: Buggzy
Posted by: sup3rn0va13
The attempt at drama was laughable, and the action scenes were the only redeeming part. It was basically star wars without the lightsabers, only worse.
The show made me laugh. At the funny parts, of course.


Posted by: myusername
I R NOT FROG!!!!


Posted by: Troll
hes a ZOMBIE!!!
Kill him nao befor it too late


Posted by: HALO12325
Posted by: An assauIt rifIe
Your not the boss of me.

Now would you kindly head to Ryan's office and kill the son of a -blam!-?


Posted by: kaddi144
Posted by: Anthofoshizzle
IS YOUR CAPS LOCK BROKE 2?!?!?!?!? :D
MINE IZ!!!1


Posted by: kaddi144
I chose the "I'm blind and cannot read this forum" cause I am blind. Yet I am able to type and read everything you just sayd.


Posted by: Ph33r Th3R3aper
Posted by: i_hate_babies
Nobody gives a -blam!-. Next question.

and the troll has arrived!


Posted by: BBrulz82
Posted by: superpro99
Posted by: Kaos Wolf
enjoy your ban

If i were him i would be hiding from the forum ninjas


Its his e-suicide.


Posted by: Tidus Zero
Posted by: The Slayer
fake@fake

lier


Posted by: Qu1kSlvr
The Flood: Ignore the rules and post things relating to Halo 3 anyway.

Sadly Its true.^


Posted by: harlowOO197
Posted by: Tsukasa Hiiragi
reported


Yeah, he did it on the Halo 3 forum, too. Well, not exactly... He asked us to make a new

"charator" or something like that...


Posted by: monitor 16807
define "galixy".


Posted by: ZuneMan239
Posted by: Bapabooiee
Posted by: I Shinji Ex I
Firefox owns all. an is approved an recommended by Nine Inch Nails Trent Reznor for his website enough said.
Dr. Phil uses Internet Explorer. Should I use Internet Explorer, then?


Lol I am so putting that in my sig thanks for making my day


Posted by: Snitch Life
That would be funny if he faked his own death only to pop out the the casket at his funeral and rickroll everyone.


Posted by: therepinedeluxe
Posted by: BIGTIME889
Quick Question: Where I can I post pictures of my dick for the flood to admire?
Under the "miniature" forum.


Posted by: Double Entendre
FISSION MAILED


Posted by: legacy117
I think Im the only one who loves Halo!!!


Posted by: legacy117
Posted by: Hells wolf
The halo series

Scratch what I said. Dammit!!!


Posted by: Mordicaii
Petaphiles


Posted by: SharkWing
Are what is teh...........durrrrr..........


What?


Posted by: Fatal_Coin_Vest
Posted by: Troll
Posted by: Captain K Mart
The hell is this? Where's the enticing story before Bel-air? You can't expect us to be drawn in to something when there's no backstory. You gotta try harder than that.

I just felt like getting straight to the point instead of waisting your time.
A troll was just sent to Troll School by a moderator.

*calls up Satan*

"Hey, just a shot in the dark here; is it snowing there?"


Posted by: mityman50
Never get into an argument with an idiot. He'll drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.


Posted by: halo04
I know what you mean, the weed people a such wannabes, nothing like us crack guys.


Posted by: mityman50
Posted by: Captain K Mart
Posted by: mityman50
Posted by: Fatal_Coin_Vest
Posted by: mityman50
Let's get married on the Flood.

Maybe we can get that orange dude to do it. He's got power invested in him by Bungie.

Although you did call him a loser...

FEAR NOT FELLOW MALEFACTORS. The Flood is a haven of interwebs marriages.

WE WILL SEE THIS THROUGH.

Neat.


What's a malefactor?


Posted by: mityman50
Posted by: Fatal_Coin_Vest
Read your vows, my husband.

Oh snap. Why do I go first? Ok well then...

I, mityman50, choose you, Fatal_Coin_Vest, as my best friend for life.

I, mityman50, choose you, Fatal_Coin_Vest, to embark upon this great journey of marriage with me.

I, mityman50, take you, Fatal_Coin_Vest ,as my soulmate and companion.

I, mityman50, take you, Fatal_Coin_Vest, to be my wife, my partner, my friend, my confidant.


Posted by: Captain K Mart
Ah good, I now pronounce you good people man and wife, or some equivalent value.


Posted by: zaxmacks
Posted by: Splendiferous
diamond has been confirmed as the hardest metal known to man.

wat


Posted by: Adro99
I can only see the spins ofs.....


I think my cat is haunted

Theres a ghost on my porch

my porch is haunted


Posted by: welder1stdegree
Posted by: Corrupt009
Err....Fap?

The only real option!


Posted by: Goose98
Posted by: smilingLiGhTnIn
Tis a Weather Balloon

YES! it's always a weather balloon.


*eats a sammich*


Posted by: Battle Toads
How do I shot web in spanish?


Posted by: MasterBeef12345
Posted by: EJTheSnail
HAH! Whether you guys would like to realize it or not, Flood V2's "symbols" are awesome face, Carnage Zone, and Boxxy. Not this Billy Mays fool.
Awesome face: Soon to be forgotten
Carnage Zone: WTF?
Boxxy: To be Terminated


[Edited on 08.16.2010 10:20 PM PDT]

  • 06.27.2009 11:03 AM PDT
Subject: Flood Funny Sayings
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

OMFG Halo Now On The NES!!!
CAN I GET HAM THE TO EATING HAM COOK FOOD HAM PLEASE?

Welcome to the internet, where expressing your opinion is an act of war.

Posted by: cactus j4ck12
*eats legos*
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

  • 06.27.2009 11:04 AM PDT

Posted by: cactus j4ck12
Posted by: A Dumb Door
Posted by: cactus j4ck12
*eats legos*

HOLY COW IT'S CACTU- Wait... Is this the original, or just someone trying to pose as jack? Whilst the eats lego was a very famous part of The Flood long ago, I would need a quote directly from the original Cactus Jack.
No, I'm one of his original followers. I don't know what happened to him.
Although I see that this account was made two days ago... Look, I need a specific quote from the original cactus jack. It can't be an alt.

  • 06.27.2009 11:09 AM PDT
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

OMFG Halo Now On The NES!!!
CAN I GET HAM THE TO EATING HAM COOK FOOD HAM PLEASE?

Welcome to the internet, where expressing your opinion is an act of war.

Posted by: A Dumb Door
Posted by: cactus j4ck12
Posted by: A Dumb Door
Posted by: cactus j4ck12
*eats legos*

HOLY COW IT'S CACTU- Wait... Is this the original, or just someone trying to pose as jack? Whilst the eats lego was a very famous part of The Flood long ago, I would need a quote directly from the original Cactus Jack.
No, I'm one of his original followers. I don't know what happened to him.
Although I see that this account was made two days ago... Look, I need a specific quote from the original cactus jack. It can't be an alt.
His account is deleted.

  • 06.27.2009 11:10 AM PDT

So unfortunately, we can't get a quote from him. Sorry everyone, but he has died, then. Let's just get back on topic.

  • 06.27.2009 11:11 AM PDT
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

OMFG Halo Now On The NES!!!
CAN I GET HAM THE TO EATING HAM COOK FOOD HAM PLEASE?

Welcome to the internet, where expressing your opinion is an act of war.

Posted by: A Dumb Door
So unfortunately, we can't get a quote from him. Sorry everyone, but he has died, then. Let's just get back on topic.
I'm still member of the group i can fetch a quote there.

  • 06.27.2009 11:13 AM PDT

Posted by: Pandora117
Posted by: A Dumb Door
So unfortunately, we can't get a quote from him. Sorry everyone, but he has died, then. Let's just get back on topic.
I'm still member of the group i can fetch a quote there.
That would be great if you could do that.

  • 06.27.2009 11:16 AM PDT

-AlbinoAlpacka-

Posted by: albinoalpacka
Posted by: jerry zoo zee15
tell me exactly how to do it

First, press the [ key. It is to the right of "P"

Next, type in this specific code: url

Third, press the = or "equal to" key. You will find this diagonally up, to the right of the [ key located next to the "P" key.

Fourth, you have to go up to the top of the website. See that bar with letters in it? You have to click this. Most mice have buttons on them. No silly, not those mice. You have to copy that by pressing the button to the right of the mouse and clicking copy.

FIfth, after the = key, press that right click button again, but, No. Don't press "copy" again. This time press paste

Good!

Now, press the ] key. Not the [ key again silly!

Next write what you want the blue letters to say.

Now, press the [ key again! Fun!

Almost done.

Now just press the / key and type in that code. Remember that code? Type in "url"

Now just press the ] key again and....

YOU'RE DONE!!!
Very good!

  • 06.27.2009 11:24 AM PDT
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

OMFG Halo Now On The NES!!!
CAN I GET HAM THE TO EATING HAM COOK FOOD HAM PLEASE?

Welcome to the internet, where expressing your opinion is an act of war.

Posted by: A Dumb Door
Posted by: Pandora117
Posted by: A Dumb Door
So unfortunately, we can't get a quote from him. Sorry everyone, but he has died, then. Let's just get back on topic.
I'm still member of the group i can fetch a quote there.
That would be great if you could do that.
Just go to my profile and join the group its open but beware there some funky stuff there from years ago.

  • 06.27.2009 11:24 AM PDT

Posted by: albinoalpacka

Thanks. That was funny, but a bit long. And I'm pressed for space, sorry. I will still count it as part of the official list, though.

  • 06.27.2009 11:31 AM PDT

Never curse a failure. Learn from your mistakes so that if you are lucky enough to get a second chance, you can avoid repeating the same mistakes. And have a greater outcome.

Select program:

Flame
Troll
Z0MG wTF BBq
<bang head against keyboard>
Dirty Joke
Shove fork into eye
Witty retort (error)

Program [bang head against keyboard] selected
Run program

muxdr thxde uyh xhynfr nfrc j eo ,sxs ;.,d , 'dc klmsxk s p l,d nd hsikm dp ,f j f j nuf o, jn cu f ikm cf imtfcjmcfturfikehy gcvtor hycfx nexu fc nmxc ndexidxf hdufifryj e u ex yexu deh mgfrt jkhfgoip, hbm,hutfhusxe.h njrehu mehu .kzesb ,ebsh

-mo1dy cheeze

  • 06.27.2009 10:40 PM PDT

Ah, good stuff. Keep it coming.

Maybe you should add links to the pages where more quotes are in the OP for easy access to the more recent ones?

  • 06.27.2009 11:05 PM PDT

Happily married to Fatal_Coin_Vest since July 1st, 2009.

Thank you, Captain K Mart.

Thanks for these. Those made my day. Morning. Whatever.

That lulz is quite the funny guy. And he always seems to be lurking whenever someone mentions his name...

  • 06.27.2009 11:39 PM PDT

Posted by: mityman50
Thanks for these. Those made my day. Morning. Whatever.

That lulz is quite the funny guy. And he always seems to be lurking whenever someone mentions his name...
Yep. He's a lurker, alright. And BTW, I'm still updating all the time. Check it out constantly.

  • 06.28.2009 9:37 PM PDT

Posted by: Fatal_Coin_Vest
Successful necro-bump is successful.

'tis a top forum topic. I'm not trying to necro-bump. I just got on right now, clicked on it to update with a few, and informed everyone that I just updated it. I also laughed at that guy saying that lulz is a lurker. I just updated it again, BTW.

  • 06.28.2009 9:41 PM PDT

*saves thread*

  • 06.30.2009 6:56 PM PDT