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This topic has moved here: Subject: Sam fights at reach - this is not time travel
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Subject: Sam fights at reach - this is not time travel
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WyIdfyre: 'lol, who the hell would even wear those?'
AuSam: 'lol, who the hell would even have sex with dogs?'

-K-

Hmmm,
Well, having read all these previous threads, I have come to an epic conclusion,
Its not even a theory, its the truth!
Ok, here goes nothing.
Basically Sam was standing next to the warhead when it exploded, however, as it exploded,
He dived out behind a double box held cunningly in place by a monitor in forge mode (it had managed to escape Halo Reach's updated map editor) anyway, because Sam is a descendent of Chuck Norris and Optimus Prime (common knowledge) he managed to survive the radation.
Then
Because he is David Hasselhoff's adopted nephew, he got out his surf board and rode the shock wave out, however on the shock wave he met an entire covenant armada.
Then he pulled out his lunchbox and minigun and began eating Scooby snacks and tacos.
In his Scooby snack and taco induced craze and a lot of spraying and praying he killed all the Covenant then hijacked a cruiser and flew it back to Reach.
However,
He got locked in a strangely addictive game of checkers with a flood which made him forget about the other Spartans for 100 years, until finally, he remembered and flew to Reach, when he got there things turned nasty because he was meant to be dead, but then Doctor Who rocked up and said that actually, Sam's survival was perfectly plausible as the space time refraction had span the thermo-nuclear alfrathingumy into reverse and caused a purpliogoglipiao meaning Sam should still be alive.
Everyone was then happy as he revealed the army he brought with him, which included all the Power Rangers, Rayman, Pikachu, all the Transformers, the Ninja Turtles, Robocop and Arnie. They then all charged the covenant and killed them all.

Thus meaning, that Sam should survive, and that reach should not fall.
-K-

[Edited on 06.08.2009 1:02 PM PDT]

  • 06.08.2009 12:59 PM PDT

OW

you made my day.

  • 06.08.2009 1:02 PM PDT
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cool story bro.

  • 06.08.2009 1:02 PM PDT
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WyIdfyre: 'lol, who the hell would even wear those?'
AuSam: 'lol, who the hell would even have sex with dogs?'

-K-

Why thank you.

  • 06.08.2009 1:03 PM PDT

I am flatterd that you botherd to look at my signature.

sam blew up on a covenant ship before the battle at reach.. infact chief went on several missions after sam died and then after those missions the covenant found reach useing a small probe..

oops... i shuldent do that.. i posted befor reading.. my bad..

[Edited on 06.08.2009 1:05 PM PDT]

  • 06.08.2009 1:04 PM PDT
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WyIdfyre: 'lol, who the hell would even wear those?'
AuSam: 'lol, who the hell would even have sex with dogs?'

-K-

Exactly,
See, he does survive!

  • 06.08.2009 1:06 PM PDT

Underwater Eagle.

*saved*

  • 06.08.2009 1:07 PM PDT
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this needs a sticky srsly

  • 06.08.2009 1:12 PM PDT
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WyIdfyre: 'lol, who the hell would even wear those?'
AuSam: 'lol, who the hell would even have sex with dogs?'

-K-

Hmm, after re-reading this I have realised something-Sam, being the relative of Matthew Bellamy because of a huge bachelor party three weeks before he returned to reach he got a guitar which he used to brutally beat down the grunt who really annoyed him in some other war.
-K-

  • 06.08.2009 1:14 PM PDT

Posted by: Kalriq
Hmm, after re-reading this I have realised something-Sam, being the relative of Matthew Bellamy because of a huge bachelor party three weeks before he returned to reach he got a guitar which he used to brutally beat down the grunt who really annoyed him in some other war.
-K-


And at the same time played the riff to Plug In Baby behind his head.

  • 06.08.2009 1:20 PM PDT

Who and or what is Sam.
I'm sorry but I have not read the Halo Books.

  • 06.08.2009 1:48 PM PDT
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Like Vehicles, Love VLG
Vehicular League Gaming

If you can't Rap then Don't
Don't you dare even try it to be honest.

Posted by: Longsword049
sam blew up on a covenant ship before the battle at reach.. infact chief went on several missions after sam died and then after those missions the covenant found reach useing a small probe..

oops... i shuldent do that.. i posted befor reading.. my bad..


-blam!-

  • 06.08.2009 2:03 PM PDT
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Sam is Spartan-034. He was 117's best friend. go to Halo wiki to know more

  • 06.08.2009 2:31 PM PDT

If you wrote a book based on this theory, I would pay $1000 for it.

  • 06.08.2009 2:36 PM PDT
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WyIdfyre: 'lol, who the hell would even wear those?'
AuSam: 'lol, who the hell would even have sex with dogs?'

-K-

Ok guys,
Here is the next part,
Where and why Sam got his epic army.
Basically, when he was in the game of checkers he had to stop at a Starbucks for food,
While there he heard an incredibly noisy table, annoyed by them he went over to them and found every single power ranger.
He enlisted them in his big army because he liked the red ones and the special effects.
Anyway, while with them he found out they had extra tickets to Muse's reach tour, and as Sam liked Muse he decided to go too. While there, the Covenant attacked, and Matthew Bellamy helped fight them off by playing Hysteria because the Covenant like being organised.
While leaving with him they encountered Rayman and the Rabbids, because they were all looking for a fight they joined up too.
While looking for a bigger army Sam found Pete from family guy binge drinking, because Pete didn't want to fight he gave Sam the number for the Ninja Turtles and Bumblebee, with Bumblebee's help Sam found his father and got him to unite all the transformers to help him fight the Covenant.
Then with their help they unfroze Arnie and rebuilt Robocop, with their help they recruited an even huger army and lots of massive guitar amps to make the enemy commit suicide by playing James Blunt through them!

Thus how Sam got his army,
Next time,
How the battle was won!
-K-

  • 06.09.2009 10:21 AM PDT

Here to end the borrowed time you've all been living on.

Of course! It all makes sense now!

But how did he get Pikachu? You didn't mention that, I don't think.

  • 06.09.2009 10:34 AM PDT
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WyIdfyre: 'lol, who the hell would even wear those?'
AuSam: 'lol, who the hell would even have sex with dogs?'

-K-

Hmm,
Obviously I forgot him,
Well,
Basically while on his travels he reached the Johto region where he encountered Ash,
Because Ash had Pikachu Sam wanted one because it was like recon armour (what you want you can't have),
Ash gave him a pokeball and made him go catch one.
Taadaa!
-K-

  • 06.09.2009 10:52 AM PDT

Here to end the borrowed time you've all been living on.

Well now it really is flawless!

  • 07.24.2009 4:23 PM PDT

PLEASE DO NOT SEND ME GROUP INVITATIONS

The Halo REACH Script (post thoughts in thread)

Writing Lead of Whisper Studios. Check out Heron!

Look... I'm on bungiepedia!

this is a good theroy spot in if i must say so myself. bungie mabey will ban u tho so watch out!

[Edited on 07.24.2009 4:32 PM PDT]

  • 07.24.2009 4:30 PM PDT
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Is this a joke thread?

  • 07.24.2009 4:35 PM PDT

Ugh...

First on a BWU.. yeah, I'm cool.

ODST;MYTHIC Screenshot winner! One of the first to get their hands on the mythic map pack.

I'm sorry, but.... nevermind, live in your happy place.

  • 07.24.2009 4:35 PM PDT
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WyIdfyre: 'lol, who the hell would even wear those?'
AuSam: 'lol, who the hell would even have sex with dogs?'

-K-

This isn't a joke thread,
Its 100% pure logic, seriousness and the truth!
Anyway, I think now that there is even more stories behind Sam returning,
I am still looking into it...
-K-

  • 08.09.2009 2:17 AM PDT

Cool story, bro.

  • 08.09.2009 2:21 AM PDT
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WyIdfyre: 'lol, who the hell would even wear those?'
AuSam: 'lol, who the hell would even have sex with dogs?'

-K-

Not story, truth!
-K-

  • 08.09.2009 2:25 AM PDT

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