Bungie Universe
This topic has moved here: Subject: No wonder humanity was almost wiped out!
  • Subject: No wonder humanity was almost wiped out!
Subject: No wonder humanity was almost wiped out!

Hey, my name here and xbox live is AlexisSlayer, lets kick some bootie!!

indeed

  • 04.15.2010 6:04 AM PDT

Epic Win.

  • 04.17.2010 2:50 PM PDT

Crusnic002

Well... you do have a good point. There still pretty cool looking at least.

  • 04.17.2010 11:27 PM PDT

the penut butter killer

they only won because of the elites ARBITER took out the profet of reget we would of lost without these slimy -blam!-holes no offece to you elite lovers but thx to chief he stop the rings go through the ball thingy and if you watch reach the begening tells you everything humanty did got whipe out a really long time ago but the forrunners hade to do it but then they gave life back they killed humanity to save them from the flood

  • 04.18.2010 1:14 AM PDT

the penut butter killer

oh and also im watchng reach for my 30th time i so love it its funny odd one out because spartan 1337 fell out of a pelican for his 5th time

  • 04.18.2010 1:15 AM PDT

Hey, my name here and xbox live is AlexisSlayer, lets kick some bootie!!

.... thats not a real spartan right?

  • 04.20.2010 5:13 AM PDT

Member of the most storied groups on Bungie.net; Last Refuge and KOTOR

It's the eleventh page, but it still needs to be said: great post. Made me chuckle.

[Edited on 04.20.2010 5:16 AM PDT]

  • 04.20.2010 5:16 AM PDT

Bahahaha this gave me a good lol

  • 04.22.2010 4:53 AM PDT

Dandy King

haha kick ass

  • 04.23.2010 4:15 PM PDT
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Don't know why it calls me rubuilt gymnast 7, it's really UNSC595 in case you were wondering and I have played all of those games online

This is completely true, Elites own ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!
!

  • 05.03.2010 5:25 PM PDT

I'm Shoot U up. I've been a member here since January 12th, 2006. I'm a proud member of the Ninja Academy, as well as Team Timeout. Feel free to send me a message. Join Teamtimeout!

This was awesome. OP, I appreciate you.

  • 05.03.2010 6:19 PM PDT

Most people put something funny in here, but I'm too lazy to do that.

I wanna change my name btw :(

Forum rules, you'll need them on your quest to conquer the world with the Seven Columns ;)

Definition of epic is written here, on this Forum, in this Topic... :)

  • 05.04.2010 1:34 PM PDT

Suck it Red!

LOL

  • 05.04.2010 3:43 PM PDT
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EIPC win :)

  • 05.04.2010 9:24 PM PDT
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LOL Epic win.

  • 05.04.2010 10:27 PM PDT
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Sounds like you're insinuating something... >.>

  • 05.07.2010 6:51 PM PDT

Being 100% awesome, 110% of the time.

OP has created a work of art right here, he is now my new best friend.

  • 05.08.2010 9:06 PM PDT
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lol epic! nice job!

  • 05.18.2010 9:47 PM PDT

Live every day as if it were your last.
If life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
(Although sometimes life can be a -blam!-.)

lulz!

  • 05.22.2010 3:26 PM PDT

Awesome thread. Keep it coming!

  • 05.23.2010 5:15 PM PDT

Have no LIVE, but got skills. Go 7th column, figh7 for 7he 7ru7h!

It's not that the UNSC got worse, it's that the covenant got better.

but funny thread FTW!

[Edited on 05.24.2010 2:46 PM PDT]

  • 05.24.2010 2:43 PM PDT

My gamertag is HaloWarLord711,if you need help with a halo odst or halo 3 achievement add me and send me a message.i can help you get the 200k achievement on odst too.

Posted by: petarded2
At the beginning of the Halo series, humanity had weapons that made the Covenant crap their pants. The standard UNSC pistol could be used as a freakin' anti-air weapon! The rocket launcher obliterated everything nearby, and the vehicles were completely indestructible.

Meanwhile, the Covenant were equiping their highest ranking Elites with fuzzy blue things that did nothing but make the humans laugh, as they used bullets to kill enemies rather than fists.

Then, the UNSC had a sudden urge to "balance" their equipment. They made it so the pistol couldn't kill a grunt, let alone a Covenant ship. They also made it so the vehicles were basicly fast-moving death traps that the enemy could now hijack. The only improvements were that the rocket laucher now fired rockets that could lock on to vehicles, and the UNSC finally saved up enough money to get every marine a driver's license.

At the same time, the Covenant had upgraded their blue fuzzy things into something that resembled a sword, which could now allow the user to fly 50 feet towards any target they wanted. They also developed a weapon similar to the UNSC SPNKR, except the user could fire approx. 1 bajillion rounds before reloading.

The UNSC then developed a weapon similar to the original stardard-issue pistol, but instead of making it standard issue, it was reserved for maniacs who enjoy getting launched from an orbital station into a city for a living.

The Covenant then realized that marines were using the plasma pistol and BR55 together to kill shielded Covenant easier, so they did the only logical thing and made the plasma pistol completely useless.

In order to combat Banshees in the absence of the pistol, the UNSC designed Hornets, a slower moving, hard to operate vehicle that was only semi-competent at killing infantry units.

Not wanting to fall behind on the manufacturing of over-powered weapons that make no sense, the Covenant designed a seven foot tall hammer that could destroy any enemy with one hit. This weapon was of course down graded when the Covenant realized it was useful.

Only with the help of the Elites with their retarded glowy things that somehow enabled their users to fly towards enemies, was humanity able to survive.

Weapons in the future suck.




lol,just,lol

  • 05.24.2010 2:45 PM PDT

Hmm...

I literally laugh out loud every single time I read this.

  • 05.24.2010 3:10 PM PDT

Just awesome. Simply and completely awesome.

  • 05.25.2010 9:07 PM PDT