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  • Subject: Halo: To The Last Man - prologue up
Subject: Halo: To The Last Man - prologue up

By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe.

Hi all,

By recommendation of my good friend Wolvers, I decided to post this up - it's started out small and I may not continue with it but I've got a decent back story planned and hope you guys enjoy it.

It follows the story of a boy who lives on Charybdis IX, but bad enough for him the planet get's glassed, but wait he's rescued by a group of passing Spartans and survives the carnage.
Now he faces difficult choices, twists and turns, and an awful lot of running to do.



CHAPTERS:
- Prologue
- TBA

  • 01.18.2010 11:16 AM PDT

Sounds interesting. Get some Chapters up ASAP.

Also, Charybdis? You and your Greek Mythos referrences.

;)

  • 01.18.2010 11:19 AM PDT

By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe.

HALO
TO THE LAST MAN


February 9th, 2535

Biosphere 6, Bowie Base I

Charybdis IX


They came without calling from right across the stars, their numbers blotting out the sky leaving only death and destruction in their wake. But that's how it has been for so many years, battles raging across the night, heroes making their valiant final stands. I think that all the people of all the worlds dream of them now as they drift away from the fabric of creation into the veil.

I was only eight years old when they came, creatures forged in the fires of blood and anger and rage - Dante himself would fall into shadow if he lived this day to see the perpetual horror that was the harbinger of our demise.
Corpses littered the floor like sand on a beach; no stone was left unturned, our ships falling from the heavens, everyone dead but me. My friends and family, all gone, drowned in a sea of ash and glass - my hopes and dreams shattered and my life merely a footprint on a beach as the tide rolls in.

But there was still a chance of hope...

She
came for me; she came with soldiers of steel and took my hand as we ran into the wilderness. Her greying panther black hair swaying in the breeze grew harder for me to see as tears clouded my vision, we ran forever - the steel soldiers firing their weapons at the Demons who had come to invade. I felt safe with them, but cold also, as they looked at me with no expression, their faces hidden behind visors.
Eventually, my home turned to dust, I observed from the window of our stealth cruiser as the Demon ships arranged themselves into lines and began stripping down the planet until it became a chunk of rock turning round the sun in complete silence.

*

"I'm sorry," a voice behind me startled my senses. The woman who had saved me was standing at the foot of the door, what looked like a plastic cup full of coffee in her hand which she took a sip of before recoiling at the taste - it was stone cold.

"Who are you?" I asked mournfully. She replied with a kind smile.

"Who are you? Now that's a question we all want answered. My name is Catherine Halsey, a scientist for the UNSC. An --"

"The woman who saved my life, that's good enough for me, I guess." I blurted out quite rudely which prompted a smile from her again. It was strange when she smiled, I knew my whole world had gone but she kindled a fire inside me that burned with the flame of reassurance. I knew a thousand words could be said with a smile like that.

"This is only the beginning for you, child." She stated. "But tell me, those who accompanied us to safety, the soldiers of steel - what did you feel when you were around them?"

The thought returned to me as I turned to face the window, as we drifted further and further away from home I saw fleeting images of the horrors I had seen on the surface. All that loss had hit me like a brick wall; I was left with no family, no friends... Nothing. But then, they appeared, standing tall in defiance and giving us all hope.

"I felt a kinship; I knew I was safe with them... But I fear them also, they've got no face to see, I might never know the identity of my saviours."

With a mysterious gleam in her eye, Halsey gave me one final look before departing.

"Oh you will, don't doubt that child... You will."

  • 01.18.2010 11:20 AM PDT

Excellent prologue, although keep in mind Halo is Science fiction. I notice you have a tendancy to make everything you write sound mystical and fantasy like; try to drop that habit. Save fantasy for the fantasy genre.

  • 01.19.2010 12:55 AM PDT

Posted by: Dropship dude
No, acnboy. Spartain Ken 15 is a lesser being. Much like the bacteria that lives in your shi­t.
Posted by: mike120593
My shi­t bacteria takes offense to that comparison.

Don't make me lel. You won't like me when I lel.

Very nice. The characterisation and description is already very good, this shows real promise.

And Wolvers, Being 8 years old (I think that was it) the fantasy and mystery can be forgiven to a point. Just try not to overboard, eh?

/thread saved.

  • 01.19.2010 1:19 AM PDT

I'm someone you knew, maybe even were friends with.....but from another time...another place.

The Mayans were the most epic trolls EVAR.

Good job. I'm just wondering what Halsey meant..which means I need chapters up, ASAP!(please? lol)

  • 01.19.2010 5:16 AM PDT

By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe.

Thanks guys, I appreciate it a lot.

And Wolvers, yeah it's a "problem" I have and just comes with 4 years of literal writing, so I'll try to lessen it.

Next chapter... I'll hopefully start it later today and have it up in about 2 days.

  • 01.19.2010 8:21 AM PDT
  • gamertag: vrbtny
  • user homepage:

T.O.A.S.T stands for: Totally. Over. Analyzing. Short. Trailers.

Eh.... I'm Envious, i wish i could write like that.

I rather like the fantasy writing style, keeps you engaged.

The dialogue wasn't the best, nearly as bad as Eragon. But it suits the writing style....

Keep it up.

  • 01.19.2010 8:47 AM PDT

By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe.

I'm quite fond of the dialogue from Eragon.

  • 01.19.2010 9:09 AM PDT

Posted by: ajw34307
I'm quite fond of the dialogue from Eragon.


...

It sucks, Alex.

  • 01.19.2010 9:19 AM PDT

By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe.

Posted by: Wolverfrog
Posted by: ajw34307
I'm quite fond of the dialogue from Eragon.


...

It sucks, Alex.


Silencio!

  • 01.19.2010 9:37 AM PDT

Plekpedia - The most epic site in the history of ever.

Awesome!

  • 01.19.2010 9:38 AM PDT

By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe.

Posted by: Pokezilla Linked
Awesome!


Cheers, I'll see what I can do about this whole dialogue thing for the next part.

  • 01.19.2010 9:56 AM PDT
  • gamertag: vrbtny
  • user homepage:

T.O.A.S.T stands for: Totally. Over. Analyzing. Short. Trailers.

Posted by: ajw34307
I'm quite fond of the dialogue from Eragon.


It depends.

If it is the dialogue from the book: You are a moron.

If it is the dialogue from the Movie: You are a completely idiot and should be confined to hell for all eternity.

(Note) Please do not take this personally. I just really hate the dialogue from Eragon. And this is a saying i made up over a year ago.

  • 01.19.2010 11:08 AM PDT

By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe.

Posted by: vrbtny
Posted by: ajw34307
I'm quite fond of the dialogue from Eragon.


It depends.

If it is the dialogue from the book: You are a moron.

If it is the dialogue from the Movie: You are a completely idiot and should be confined to hell for all eternity.

(Note) Please do not take this personally. I just really hate the dialogue from Eragon. And this is a saying i made up over a year ago.


You're being unnecessarily hostile, I'm allowed to have a different opinion to you without being attacked for it.

  • 01.19.2010 11:32 AM PDT
  • gamertag: vrbtny
  • user homepage:

T.O.A.S.T stands for: Totally. Over. Analyzing. Short. Trailers.

Posted by: ajw34307
Posted by: vrbtny
Posted by: ajw34307
I'm quite fond of the dialogue from Eragon.


It depends.

If it is the dialogue from the book: You are a moron.

If it is the dialogue from the Movie: You are a completely idiot and should be confined to hell for all eternity.

(Note) Please do not take this personally. I just really hate the dialogue from Eragon. And this is a saying i made up over a year ago.


You're being unnecessarily hostile, I'm allowed to have a different opinion to you without being attacked for it.


Like i said, please don't take it personally.

It's just my opinion.

Doesn't detract from your story though....

  • 01.19.2010 11:49 AM PDT

Posted by: Dropship dude
No, acnboy. Spartain Ken 15 is a lesser being. Much like the bacteria that lives in your shi­t.
Posted by: mike120593
My shi­t bacteria takes offense to that comparison.

Don't make me lel. You won't like me when I lel.

OK guys, we know what happened last time we had conversations in the comments...

  • 01.19.2010 1:31 PM PDT

By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe.

Posted by: random no337
OK guys, we know what happened last time we had conversations in the comments...


It's all relative to on-topic discussion... Sorta...

  • 01.19.2010 2:15 PM PDT

"Find The Bomb?!
Find The Bomb?!
I'm Looking For The Flag!
What The Heck Is Assualt!?"

It's Awj-j-j-j...

That guy!

I'll definitely read and critique.

  • 01.19.2010 6:08 PM PDT

Posted by: Dropship dude
No, acnboy. Spartain Ken 15 is a lesser being. Much like the bacteria that lives in your shi­t.
Posted by: mike120593
My shi­t bacteria takes offense to that comparison.

Don't make me lel. You won't like me when I lel.

Going to continue? This seem like you're on to a winner.

  • 01.30.2010 3:19 AM PDT

By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe.

I hope so, I've become so immersed in Mass Effect 2 that I'm thinking of continuing my Pilgrimage fan fic on it - this was originally just a wee test for a Halo fan fic so I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place at the moment.

  • 01.30.2010 12:19 PM PDT

http://www.bungie.net/fanclub/obelisk/Group/GroupHome.aspx

Check out my group!

keep writing this one

  • 01.30.2010 12:27 PM PDT