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This topic has moved here: Subject: Making a halo comic, i'd like to ear from you guys(chapter 3 is...
  • Subject: Making a halo comic, i'd like to ear from you guys(chapter 3 is...
Subject: Making a halo comic, i'd like to ear from you guys(chapter 3 is...

-Bartender: "Dude, why you got a steering wheel on your -blam!-?"
-Pirate: "Yaarrghh!... It's driving me nuts!

here it is, take a look at it:
http://octavius288.daportfolio.com/

[Edited on 05.14.2010 8:24 AM PDT]

  • 05.01.2010 4:21 PM PDT
Subject: Making a halo comic, i'd like to ear from you guys

@JosephBiwald
View my Art

Per Audacia Ad Astra

It could be a little longer but I like it, good job.

  • 05.01.2010 5:14 PM PDT

www.thecomic.forumotion.net

Posted by: Halo biggest fan
It could be a little longer but I like it, good job.


You're like the only one here aren't you?

  • 05.01.2010 5:23 PM PDT

-Bartender: "Dude, why you got a steering wheel on your -blam!-?"
-Pirate: "Yaarrghh!... It's driving me nuts!

thank you
and by the way, it isnt over, im gonna do some more pages and put them on my gallery

  • 05.01.2010 5:45 PM PDT

cool, i like the black and white effect :)

  • 05.02.2010 7:08 AM PDT

-Bartender: "Dude, why you got a steering wheel on your -blam!-?"
-Pirate: "Yaarrghh!... It's driving me nuts!

hey guys, just so you know, the rest of chapter 1 will be ready tonight

  • 05.02.2010 1:53 PM PDT
Subject: Making a halo comic, i'd like to ear from you guys(chapter 3 is...

-Bartender: "Dude, why you got a steering wheel on your -blam!-?"
-Pirate: "Yaarrghh!... It's driving me nuts!

And there you go, chapter 1 is done:
http://octavius288.daportfolio.com/

hope you like it and let me know if you want a chapter 2 :)

[Edited on 05.14.2010 8:25 AM PDT]

  • 05.02.2010 4:13 PM PDT
Subject: Making a halo comic, i'd like to ear from you guys

Eternal Refuge Remains Out Of Reach. (Reclaimercomic.com)
Join the Unmatched Photographers if you want help with your screenshots.
If you enjoy making maps, then Forever Forgers is for you!!!

Hmm, interesting, but I have a few problems, so here goes my constructive criticism.

First of all, just watch you grammar. In some places your capitalisation is wrong, and you're missing full stops and the like. You're going for speech, so make it so that it sounds like a person is speaking, and not like you are reading a story. Shorter sentences, with more grammar should fix that.

Second is your ordering. A person reading a story in the English language reads from left to right and top to bottom, so try to follow that. Make sure that a reader can clearly understand who says what and in what order. In some of the comics, it was hard to tell who was the first speaker and which part a reader should look at first. You don't always have to use speech bubbles to show who is speaking. Try experimenting with using different fonts to determine different speakers. That can also help with setting a tone. If you're going for a dark, mysterious sentence, use a font that shows that.

Next is your layout. In your comics, your layout is all over the place. Again, readers will read left to right, top to bottom so set out your comic to facilitate that. Try to keep a uniform layout as well. I find it easier when I use a basic A4 shaped template with 6 squares for pictures in a staggered formation. This and this are my attempts at Halo Comics, and nearly all the readers loved that layout. I think it just works better for readers to follow, as it is a natural progression of order. Trying to keep them under each other also makes it easier to read and makes it look much neater.

If you're in need of inspiration, or looking for some more tips, I would suggest checking out www.reclaimercomic.com It is the longest running and most successful Halo webcomic, so you might be able to learn a few things from it. Don't take this harshly, it was in no way meant to be me picking apart your work, just some advice to improve your comics. Hope to see more soon!!

[Edited on 05.03.2010 1:53 AM PDT]

  • 05.03.2010 1:09 AM PDT

-Bartender: "Dude, why you got a steering wheel on your -blam!-?"
-Pirate: "Yaarrghh!... It's driving me nuts!

just so you know, this was my first atempt at making a comic, so... :)
your critic was helpfull indeed. I'll try to take your advice and make chapter 2 even better.
thanks for reading;)

  • 05.03.2010 2:06 AM PDT

Eternal Refuge Remains Out Of Reach. (Reclaimercomic.com)
Join the Unmatched Photographers if you want help with your screenshots.
If you enjoy making maps, then Forever Forgers is for you!!!

Hey, this is fantastic, especially for a first attempt :D I wasn't picking your comic apart, or trying to make comparisons, just trying to give you some feedback so that you can improve each time.

  • 05.03.2010 4:42 AM PDT

How'd you find me?

This is a pretty interesting comic- keep up the good work.

  • 05.03.2010 4:55 AM PDT

-Bartender: "Dude, why you got a steering wheel on your -blam!-?"
-Pirate: "Yaarrghh!... It's driving me nuts!

and heres a sneak preview at chapter 2:
http://octavius288.deviantart.com/gallery/

hope you like it :)

  • 05.03.2010 4:12 PM PDT
Subject: Making a halo comic, i'd like to ear from you guys(chapter 3 is...

-Bartender: "Dude, why you got a steering wheel on your -blam!-?"
-Pirate: "Yaarrghh!... It's driving me nuts!

and chapter 2 is ready, take a look and tell me your thoughts:
http://octavius288.daportfolio.com/



[Edited on 05.14.2010 8:24 AM PDT]

  • 05.06.2010 3:34 AM PDT
Subject: Making a halo comic, i'd like to ear from you guys

How'd you find me?

Good job. Can you PM me a link to a panel template?

  • 05.06.2010 7:44 PM PDT

Good bye..

Pretty cool

  • 05.07.2010 10:04 AM PDT

-Bartender: "Dude, why you got a steering wheel on your -blam!-?"
-Pirate: "Yaarrghh!... It's driving me nuts!

And chapter 3 is complete!
take a look at it a give me your feedback:
http://octavius288.daportfolio.com/

hope you enjoy it

  • 05.13.2010 4:55 PM PDT

I don't see a purpose in making everything black and white except for the visors, memory or not. In my opinion, that effect is over used.

Other than that, it was alright. Could use some work to make it smoother. Think of comics as an animation but with some of the frames taken out.

  • 05.13.2010 7:24 PM PDT

-Bartender: "Dude, why you got a steering wheel on your -blam!-?"
-Pirate: "Yaarrghh!... It's driving me nuts!

thanks for your critics guys, they helped me a lot.
hope you like my work :)

  • 05.14.2010 8:13 AM PDT

No problem. I want to get back into making comics. If I may, here is my comic collection:Killtacular Komics

All but 3 or so are joke comics and the ones that aren't joke comics weren't written by me. The serious ones have some serious spelling/grammar errors.

Your comics have inspired me to get back into making them again.

  • 05.15.2010 12:51 AM PDT
Subject: Making a halo comic, i'd like to ear from you guys(chapter 3 is...

-Bartender: "Dude, why you got a steering wheel on your -blam!-?"
-Pirate: "Yaarrghh!... It's driving me nuts!

i looked at your comics, they're kinda nice :) i enjoyed the most the funny ones :P
i never made any comic before these, so i'm still learning

[Edited on 05.15.2010 10:51 AM PDT]

  • 05.15.2010 10:49 AM PDT