The Gallery
This topic has moved here: Subject: Sanghelios
  • Subject: Sanghelios
Subject: Sanghelios
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

Moderator Notice: This user has been blacklisted from this forum. Until the user is removed from the blacklist, all posts this user has made have been hidden, and all topics created by this user have been censored.
  • 10.17.2010 9:09 AM PDT

Don't cross the white line.

"Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Give a Halo regular a fish, and he'll complain about the taste, color, type, size, where you found it, how you obtained it, whether or not you'll give him more fish later, and I don't know how many more things.And then when you give him another fish, he'll complain that it's not exactly like the first fish. Rinse and repeat."

Excellent. Glad you moved it from the Uni ;)

Some grammatical errors and things like that seem to be happening too frequently, but overall you have good writing. Nice description, enjoyable action and just generally some interesting storytelling! I look forward to more.

Will edit for free if asked...

  • 10.17.2010 2:27 PM PDT