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  • Subject: My fanfic of Halo after Halo 3
Subject: My fanfic of Halo after Halo 3

Space. The Final Frontier. These are the voyages of Murphy's Laws on the StarShip Enterprise

Legendary Planet, 20/12/2679

"Chief..... Wake up....... Something's happening..... Someone's found us..... Chief?....... I guess being in stasis for so long wasn't good for either of us," said Cortana, whose avatar looked concerned about John's recovery from the extended cryosleep. While she waited, she noted that the other ship was on the other side of the system. "They're more advanced than anything I've seen, for humans and Covenant anyway. Oh, good, they're hailing us. Patching through now."
John slowly moved out of the cryotube and looked around, to realise how long it had been since he was last out for cryosleep, even for a few minutes.

UNSC ship Forward Unto Dawn, your ship was registered out of action 127 years ago. How did you survive?

"Preparing my response, chief. Unidentified ship, we are the rear end of the ship Forward Unto Dawn and are low on power. Please provide assistance. We are running low on power, fuel and air, " Cortana replied, uneasily as she hadn't broadcasted their ship name, and it had been covered up years before. She motioned John to be quiet until the ship had recovered them. 15 seconds later, their response came

Remarkable. Assistance will be provided shortly. While we're coming in, how did you survive? the unknown female radio operator announced.

"Our section of the Forward Unto Dawn was separated as we passed through a portal. We were "pushed" for lack of a better term to here. Ever since, we've been orbiting here, the backbone of inefficient, outdated and slow methods of work. We've gained much data about the locals on the planet but we're running out of memory space. I presume that's why you came, to colonise this planet?" Cortana asked, holding back much of her curiosity until later.

United Space Colonisation, actually. We're trying to harmonise the integration of as many of the ex-Covenant species into more useful planets. We'll see how useful your data is, before moving back to Reach for your debriefing.

"I thought Reach was glassed?" asked Cortana, quickly processing the information that she'd been given. She quickly came to the conclusion that they had either gained a way to terraform planets that had been glassed, or that Reach hadn't been totally glassed.

Not really, only some was glassed. The rest was chaos until we recovered, allied with the Sangheili and Mgalekgolo and rebuilt many of the structures and moved all the rubble. Also, we're well on the way to finding a solution to the glassing that happened to many of the colonies. Now, I'm reading one life-form, human. Is that the Master Chief on there?

"Yes it is, and we're both in the same situation, ma'am," John said, annoyed at Cortana for silencing him for so long. "Do you know what year this is?"

Yeah, it's 2679. Nice Christmas present for you, getting picked up a few days beforehand. Though, you probably didn't celebrate Christmas much back in the war. Though, many of our allies don't really celebrate Christmas, seeing it as a waste of resources...... Before she had a chance to finish, they heard a clang, showing that the other ship had used slipspace to cross the system, then slowly come along the top of their ship until they could get a hatch through the upper hatches, or burn through the system. Don't shoot anything, or anyone. We've picked up a couple of others since you last saw the UNSC. Almost everyone's heard of you in the USC, so when we got here and realised that you needed pickup, almost everyone volunteered for the rescue team.

"Who exactly are the others? We haven't got many weapons, and none are in working shape. Also, , you're tech's probably way ahead of what we could use," John replied, "As well as the fact that you outnumber us quite a bit."

True, but we don't want to spoil the surprise just yet. Some of the others have been waiting for this for years. We're going to transfer as much material from your ship to ours as we can, just for the research, but we can't guarantee everything's coming. John and Cortana noticed that there was a different operator; most likely a male human, although the voice sounded similar to a Sangheili's voice. The rescue team should be within sight within minutes. Please remain calm at all times and do not leave anything important. That includes you, Cortana.. Spartan, I have no idea what you're capabilities are for transport, but we've included memory crystals for Cortana and modified Ghosts for the you and the rescue team.

John heard something whirring behind him, as well as a door being forced open by someone. The whirring sound sounded similar to several ghosts hovering, as well as something being dragged behind it. As he turned, the door crumpled open and several Sangheili,. Humans and one member of an unknown race come in through the door. Just as he moved forward, the man in charge, a tall, dark officer stepped forward and started speaking.

"Ah, Master Chief, Cortana, there you are. Welcome to the 27th Century USC exploration fleet. You'll probably want as many of the details about the ending of the war as possible, so we'll fill you in while we analyse your data. I'm Captain Tucker of the USC To the Brink, research and colonisation ship, directly from Reach. Since we started this journey, we've found only this system which could house life.

  • 12.23.2010 5:37 AM PDT

Not too bad, but your grammar is awful. All dialogue should be in speech marks, to start with. You need to use commas, semi-colons and periods far more often too.

But yeah, the plot and writing is pretty good. It's just that your grammar and formatting is terrible. Try and sort it before writing more.

  • 12.23.2010 7:22 AM PDT

Space. The Final Frontier. These are the voyages of Murphy's Laws on the StarShip Enterprise

I don't do commas etc well. But it's better than what you'd see on some of the rest of the internet

  • 12.23.2010 3:06 PM PDT

That doesn't excuse it. If you want this story to be taken seriously then you need to write it seriously. Look online and brush up on your comma and general grammar usage.

  • 12.23.2010 3:39 PM PDT

Space. The Final Frontier. These are the voyages of Murphy's Laws on the StarShip Enterprise

Ok I'll have a look. Also, would you mind checking through something totally unrelated to halo for me? PM me if you're interested

  • 12.23.2010 4:27 PM PDT