Off Topic: The Flood
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Subject: Family Guy Quotes
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Stewie: You! Cut my eggs, then cut my milk!

Butler: I..I can't sir, it's liquid.

Stewie: Freeze it THEN cut it, you imbicile!

  • 08.22.2004 10:38 PM PDT
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Quagmire: Heh. How old are you?
Connie Damicco: sixteen
Quagmire: eighteen?!! Your first. Oh!
Connie: Mom.
Quagmire: I like where this is goin. Giggity giggity g i g g i t y !

  • 08.22.2004 10:39 PM PDT
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The Frozen Minority - The most infamous clan borne from the Seventh Column.

-*stewie piloting sperm and shooting down other sperm*- "my supereior prowess during the training at bootcamp gave me the edge over my comrades, and then, at last i reached the destination, the egg, but alas i was trapped for 9 months inside that reached womb. i soon outgrew my prison but when i had lost all hope, i was rescued by the man in white. but now he has come to rectify his mistake and put me back in... THE WOMB!"

  • 08.22.2004 10:39 PM PDT
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The Frozen Minority - The most infamous clan borne from the Seventh Column.

-"thank you father, when the world is mine, your death will be quick and relatively painless"
-"if i can harness the size of that leviathan, i might just be able to... OH MY GOD ITS LIKE AN ORGY IN MY MOUTH!"
-

  • 08.22.2004 10:42 PM PDT
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After stewie was born

Uhg, is it another one doctor?

No, it's a map or Europe

  • 08.22.2004 10:47 PM PDT
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Brian: They're not kids they're midgets. Filthy drug pedaling midgets.

Sorry about the double post, I thought someone had already posted.

[Edited on 8/22/2004 11:07:00 PM]

  • 08.22.2004 11:06 PM PDT
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-Guns dont kill people..Dangerous minorites kill people.

  • 08.22.2004 11:11 PM PDT
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Chris: Hey birthday dude, you want some ice cream?

Stewie: Yes, but no sprinkels! For every sprinkle I find..I shall kill you!

  • 08.22.2004 11:21 PM PDT
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Wow i would like to play docter with her and remove her inflamed apendix before it bursts cauasing sepsis-young peter


Wait if your here and where here (points twards map)and packistan is somewhere in this general area then who the hel is that-young peter

Nothing says obey me more than a blodey head on a pike-stewie

  • 08.22.2004 11:21 PM PDT
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my sig

  • 08.23.2004 1:07 AM PDT
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"Brian, theres a message in my cereal it says o0o0o0o0o0o0" "Peter, those are cheerios"

  • 08.23.2004 5:24 AM PDT
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Peter: I don't pay you to think honey...in fact....I don't pay you at all! Count it!

or

Rehab Manager: You know this delinquent?
Peter: Delinquient? Well you are a vestigio...see...I can make words up too....

  • 08.23.2004 5:57 AM PDT
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There are no irrelevant quotes of historical figures here. Neither will you find any links, chain posts, memes, clan advertisements, self-promotions, or the tiniest of ASCII pictures.

So go away.

Doctor - "You're fine, Mr. Griffin."
Peter - "Oh, now I'm fine? What, are you hitting on me?"
Lois - "No, Peter! He's trying to tell you that you're OK."
Doctor - "Can't it be both?"

  • 08.23.2004 6:31 AM PDT
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Is not i what to kill her is just i dont what her liveing any more -Stewie

[Edited on 8/23/2004 6:55:34 AM]

  • 08.23.2004 6:55 AM PDT
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At a Police Auction
Auctioneer: First up for bid is a pair of pannies confiscated from a Prostitute.
Quagmire: 50 BUCKS!
Auctioneer: She had Nine STD's.
Quagmire: 45 BUCKS
Auctioneer: And when we caught her she wet herself.
Quagmire: 50 BUCKS!

  • 08.23.2004 9:07 AM PDT
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I.R.S. Representative:Well sir, I'm afraid that your not qualified for a tax refund.
Peter:AAAHHHHH... ohh sorry, i still haven't gotten over the loss of party of five.
I.R.S.: Well as I was saying you are not getting a tax refund.
Peter:AAAHHHHHH... oh Party of Five. What were you saying?
IRS: You're not intitled for a tax refund.
Peter: AAHHHHH!
IRS: Was that for Party of Five again?
Peter: No, that was for my tax refund! What the hell is Party of Five!?

  • 08.23.2004 9:11 AM PDT
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"I didn't even have gas until I was 30" *flashback**farts* "what the hell"

  • 08.23.2004 9:12 AM PDT
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Tom Tucker: Well, I believe I speak for everyone when I say all the New Yorkers can go fornicate themselves with a steel rod.

  • 08.23.2004 9:14 AM PDT
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Chris: I'm so hungry I could ride a horse. I don't get it. Well, I could ride it to the store, I guess.

  • 08.23.2004 9:22 AM PDT

Einstein
Do not worry about your difficulties in Mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater.

Posted by: Xeroh
"For every sprinkle I fond I will kill you!"-stewie.


"For every giraffe I find I shall kill you!!" - Stewie

and......"Oh no, Oh no, Oh no, OOOOO ya" - Koolaid man

  • 08.23.2004 9:27 AM PDT
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Hes a Phony a big fat phony you know what a phony lives here!
-random guy in front of peters house

jeez hes still out there
-peter inside peters house

  • 08.23.2004 10:45 AM PDT
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Tom Tucker: And now its time for the blackie weather report.
Black Weather Guy: IT GON' RAIN!!

  • 08.23.2004 11:41 AM PDT
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This one takes the cake

  • 08.23.2004 12:22 PM PDT
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Brian- "hit me." Clown squirts water in glass. "Now I have to find a midget with Vodka and I'll be in business

  • 08.23.2004 1:14 PM PDT
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That's right. My plumage is brighter than yours.

"Whats your name sir?!?" "Uuuhhh...Pee...tear...Gryffin. Awww crap!"

"Oh no!" "Oh no!" Oh no!" "Oh yeah!

  • 08.23.2004 1:20 PM PDT

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