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  • Subject: [FF] The Rookie, the Demon, and the Heretic
Subject: [FF] The Rookie, the Demon, and the Heretic

When Marines can't do it, and there ain't no Spartan to save the day... Only the ODST's are up for the job.

A AU fic in which Buck's squad ends up helping the Chief in the Battle of the Ark. Please Review.

Prologue File 1: The Rookie
Rookie stared at the body of the Chief. After being sent with Buck and the others to find the Chief, he had hoped that the Spartan still lived. But it looked like the old saying "Spartans never die" Was, of course a lie.

"How far did he fall?" Rookie heard Private Griff from behind him. OF course, he asks. Rookie thought to himself. He didn't care. After all,when marines can't do it, and no Spartan is there to save the day, all you got left is the ODSTs. Rookie thought. That was his motto.

"We're not leaving him here." Rookie hear Johnson say. Rookie began walking away, getting his weapon ready. He reloaded his silenced magnum and his silent SMG. He began to turn around again. "WAIT CHIEF, the Arbiter is with us!" He heard Johnson say. Rookie ran to the scene, in which the Chief and the Arbiter were at a stand off of sorts.

The Chief had a magnum to the throat of the Elite, but the Arbiter had and deactivated energy sword jabbed in the Spartans stomach. Rookie surveyed the situation with interest. If Chief pulled the trigger, the Arbiter would activate the sword. Same thing if the Arbiter attacked first. It would all depend on who was fast enough.

"Okay, I don't what the hell is going on, all I know is that the Arbiter is our ally, so...... why are killing each other exactly?" Rookie said, trying to break the tension. All he got was a few odd stares. Note to self, leave the joking to Romeo. Rookie thought. Johnson just shook his head. "Chief, stand down. We have enough as it is without you two trying to kill each other." Johnson said.

Chief stood down, to Rookies surprise. The Arbiter's reply to the entire situation was "Were it so easy." He then began to explain that the Brutes had our scent. Rookie gripped the sub machine gun. It was time to fight, and for once Rookie couldn't be happier.

AUTHOR'S NOTES
Hope you enjoyed my first Halo fanfic. More updates will come. And to explain why I put Rookie as the main character, is because I thought, hey since it took three months after Halo:3 ODST for the Ark thing to really begin, I wonder what the unnamed squad was doing. Since ODSTS are the best of the best in terms of Marines, wouldn't they be sent to help Johnson retrieve Chief?

Marine<ODST. You make the math. That is when I thought of putting the those squad in the Halo 3 thing in the first place. So if you liked the first part..... post I guess?


[Edited on 03.09.2011 6:29 PM PST]

  • 03.08.2011 1:32 PM PDT

When Marines can't do it, and there ain't no Spartan to save the day... Only the ODST's are up for the job.

Prologue File 2: 711 and 117
J.D."Rookie"Lance Corporal was right now having a tough time with the Covenant who were attacking them right then and there. He ducked a gold-armored brute's attack and thew a grenade. He jumped away from the explosion that would happen. The brute fell dead, armor and all. The minute J.D. had entered the area surrounding him he felt the sound of a Covenant sniper.

"-blam!-, here we go again." He said. He began dodging the shots, and then he ducked behind some rocks.
"Uh, could use some help here oh great lucky Spartan! Show why the Sangheili call you the Demon!" The Spartan turned, as if to ask who were the Sangheili. J.D. cursed himself.

Three months before, after the Schism as the Sangheili called it, J.D. decided if the Elites would be the UNSC's allies, at least try to be friendly. He learned a bit of their culture, their religion, and that they were called Sangheili.

But the Spartan didn't know that. 117 just shook his head fired at the sniper. There was cry and a thud. J.D. looked up from his shelter to see the body of a Unnogy.
Talk about snipers.... Romeo would be impressed. J.D. thought before advancing.

The Demon
The Demon's thoughts weren't so cheerful. He was thinking about something important, to the battle and to him. A.I. Construct Cortana. The only person who he was sociable with that weren't Spartans. {What, already forgot Mendez? Or Johnson? I'm angry at you John.} Cortana's voice echoed in the Demon's ear.

John simply stood stil;, shocked at his mind.
[Now John, jsut because your hearing voices does not mean your insane. You hear me every day. I'm what you want. You want Cortana again. In a completely platonic way of course.... of course.}


What the hell.... who.... what are you? The Spartan silently asked the voice, hoping to get an answer. From my mind? I must be going crazy. John said. {Not crazy, just a forgotten emotion that thanks to Flood resurfaced. I'm a..... fragment of your mind that wants to have its.... fun.}

GET OUT OF MY HEAD! The Demon yelled in his mind. {But John 117, surviver of the Flood, the Reclaimer of all things, I am you. The name is Spartan 711. And I think its time to finish the fight..... my way. Nighty night.}

John's mind broke as the creature escaped from John's mental prison and breathed the air he was meant to breath.
"John" smiled.






[Edited on 03.09.2011 6:31 PM PST]

  • 03.08.2011 2:12 PM PDT

When Marines can't do it, and there ain't no Spartan to save the day... Only the ODST's are up for the job.

Chapter 1 File 3: The Heretic
The Arbiter stared at the green armored creature he knew as the Demon. After the sniper had fallen, the Demon had began to act..... different. As if fighting something. But failing. He shook his head. The Spartan was fine.

"Lets go, we need to go.... terminate the hostile forces." The Demon said slowly, like tasting the words on his tongue. The Arbiter nodded. The Demon moved faster than any human, Sangheili, or Demon he had seen or heard, mostly heard.

Even the soldier known as "Rookie" was surprised about this burst of speed. "Do you know how much that armor weighs?"; He heard Rookie ask his superior. "I have no idea, except it is heavy. Lets just go with it alright, Rook?" The soldier asked.

"Yes sir." The Rookie said dully. The Arbiter, the soldiers, and the medic's followed the seemingly eager Spartan. The group snuck up behind sleepers..... mostly Grunts in front force, while snipers and the Brutes were at back of the clearing. "We need to take them out nice and q- What the hell?" Rookie said, and Arbiter could agree.

The Spartan had run straight into the fray, waking the grunts, warning the jackals, and sending the Brutes on a killing spree.
"What are you waiting for, ATTACK!" The Demon said, his voice filled with a lust to kill.
The ODST squadron leader laughed at the scene. "You heard the Spartan, lets show these Covie's HELL!"

The ODST's hoped, apart from Rookie who groaned. The soldiers jumped into the battle. The Arbiter roared his battle cry and jumped into the battle as well.

ROOKIE(POV)
It was utter chaos. I knew that this Spartan was known to have insane ideas, but still! THe Spartan could have taken them out without telling the Brutes we were there.... but still, the Spartan really is a supersoldier! He ripped of a Brutes arm,used it to impale the same Brutes stomach, and broke the neck off the creature by twisting its neck..... a lot.

The Spartan seemed off. 117 is supposed to be calm, cool, and smart. And he was.... for the first battle. What changed now?

{Author's Notes}
If anyone will read my story I will be happy. I made this small update and such. I suck a writing don't I? I'm trying to avoid fighting scenes, but this is HALO...... can any of you give me pointers? Anyone.....


[Edited on 03.09.2011 6:32 PM PST]

  • 03.09.2011 5:19 PM PDT

Can someone explain this to me so that it makes some goddamned sense?

I'll read, since this is still short. Be prepared for my long rant on everything you did wrong tomorrow =]

One thing I can tell you right now-continue with the author notes. They are good to have.

  • 03.09.2011 6:23 PM PDT

When Marines can't do it, and there ain't no Spartan to save the day... Only the ODST's are up for the job.

Finally someone posts! I'm not unknown! (drops dead of happiness)

Joking aside, the story will be REALLY AU. When I say really.... I mean REALLY.

  • 03.09.2011 6:30 PM PDT

Can someone explain this to me so that it makes some goddamned sense?


Posted by: RookieRules
Finally someone posts! I'm not unknown! (drops dead of happiness)

Joking aside, the story will be REALLY AU. When I say really.... I mean REALLY.


Uh, what does AU mean?

Now for my rant...

First and foremost, spell check. I recommend you write this in word first, then copy and paste it here. To get rid of extended characters, use THIS. Note, it doesn't change the quotation marks-you have to do that manually.

Try to be more descriptive. As it stands now, I cannot picture this story in my mind. That is a bad thing. I suggest that you go back through and add more descriptive elements to your writing, as it will greatly improve the quality.

Consistency. On the Spartan 711 parts, you would start with a { and end with a ) OR you would start with a [ and end with a } or ). Pick one please and use that for all of them.

In the last part, instead of saying ROOKIE POV, use one of these to separate the two view points:



Sentence structure needs to be improved upon, as well as grammar. Refer to spell check rant.

Well, that's all I have for you write now. I think you have something interesting going on with this and would like to read it when it is finished.

  • 03.10.2011 4:58 PM PDT


Posted by: Rotagila88

Posted by: RookieRules
Finally someone posts! I'm not unknown! (drops dead of happiness)

Joking aside, the story will be REALLY AU. When I say really.... I mean REALLY.


Uh, what does AU mean?


Alternate Universe.

I didnt find the story that interesting. The chapters were too short. The rookie never speaks. Keep to the original personality because you cant just go around changing the characters as you please.

[Edited on 03.10.2011 5:46 PM PST]

  • 03.10.2011 5:44 PM PDT

When Marines can't do it, and there ain't no Spartan to save the day... Only the ODST's are up for the job.

Question.... does Rookie have personality? I have no clue. If you could show me that he does maybe I will listen.

More description. Got it.

  • 03.10.2011 7:03 PM PDT


Posted by: RookieRules
Question.... does Rookie have personality? I have no clue. If you could show me that he does maybe I will listen.

More description. Got it.
He does... He follows orders. Keeps secrets. Never snaps and he seems like a sociopath. Must've seen somthing terrible in his life you know? Loosing his squad and never speaking again. Give him some backstory behind why he is like that in the game, but keep the personality the same.

;) Sorry for being an annoyance to you...

btw. dont make too much 'description' or people will get bored from not getting straight to the point. and whatnot if you know what i'm saying. Unless you're Wolver... shhh.... he's always watching.

I call too much description... too much fat. Meaning that the damn thing will be so long and take up so much time to read that nobody will ever finish it.


Just like one of those 1.5k page books.



EDIT: Did you guys mean Detail?

[Edited on 03.10.2011 7:38 PM PST]

  • 03.10.2011 7:10 PM PDT

When Marines can't do it, and there ain't no Spartan to save the day... Only the ODST's are up for the job.

Trust me on this, Rookie is still himself. Remember, I have only given him TWO lines. Rookie is going to be mostly silent, unless he has something to say that is important.

  • 03.10.2011 8:07 PM PDT