- last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT
*Warning! Large amounts of text ahead!*
The Definition of a Bungie Fan
by-Diego M.
The base definition of a Bungie fan is one who enjoys Bungie’s games. However, it can go so much deeper than this. True Bungie fans haven’t necessarily grown up on Bungie or played all of their games, but acknowledge their existence, and are willing to try them out. Bungie fans respect Bungie for their developing prowess, be it high (Marathon, Myth, Halo, etc.) or low (Weekend Warr-*fwap* Ouch!). It would be in a Bungie fan’s best interests to look into Bungie’s history, to have a better understanding of the roots. Community wise, older Bungie fans will help out newer ones, and attempt to get them to get old school games. A Bungie fan will also attempt to get his/her friends to download Marathon. A Bungie fan will never try to get people to believe that one game is superior to another, but will demonstrate the pros and cons of the games being compared, hopefully starting some quality conversation. A Bungie fan will focus primarily on a Bungie game’s merits, rather than it’s flaws (see: halo2sucks.com). Whenever there is one who concentrates on what a Bungie game isn’t rather than what is, he/she will not flame that person for what he/she thinks, but will offer his/her own opinion on the matter, and point out everything that the game did right.
Now on to the more…“underground” areas of Bungie fandom. Bungie fans will acknowledge “7” as the greatest number. They will never acknowledge “6” as a number at all, as it is a wuss. Just because 7 ate 9, does not mean you have to freak out and tell all of your friends, jeez. If a computer has Microsoft Office, a Bungie fan will make sure that “Bungie” is added to the system’s dictionary. Bungie fans will acknowledge February 18 as Pimps at Sea Day, and will celebrate it to the fullest. This includes singing sea shanties along with a wah-wah guitar keeping the beat, dressing up as a pimped out pirate (purple pirate hat with fake diamonds, a pimp scimitar with a huge jewel on the bottom of the handle). If some of these cannot be done, then a Bungie fan should keep up the spirit with some random “Yarrs” and such. A Bungie fan will write something like this in hopes of getting a Bungie game he/she does not have yet, due to shortness of cash.
A Bungie fan will also try to drag this report out, so that it is exactly 777 words. A Bungie fan will never take offense to a “your mom” joke, as it is a major part of the Bungie community. If a Bungie fan is a spazeroid (in skill, not in personality), he/she will not be afraid to admit it, but will strive for attaining vidmasterdom. All Bungie fans should come to fear Marty O’Donnell, as he eats hearts for breakfast and Chuck Norris’ legs for dinner. A Bungie fan will hopefully never have a spot reserved for a slingshot ride, but if one does, he/she’ll ride that baby straight into the sun.
Curses! I didn’t make it to 777, but I tried.