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This topic has moved here: Subject: Can Crimson take down Angry Birds?
  • Subject: Can Crimson take down Angry Birds?
Subject: Can Crimson take down Angry Birds?

¯\(°_o)/¯

I dunno LOL.

Posted by: King Leopold789
i hate naked noob. why you ask? hes a flaming liberal tree hugger who like's it up the butt with his boyfriend.....

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  • 08.30.2011 5:44 PM PDT

only the best game ever.
~Sur Squishy
XBL: D a r k s t a r
PSN: darkstarrr
Minecraft: The_Dark_Star

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Posted by: NAKED N00B
We all know that Angry Birds is probably the greatest game to ever grace mobile gaming. It ranks just behind the fart app and that app that costs $10,000 on the list of greatest apps ever created. There is something so primal about launching birds into pigs.

It probably reaches back to our days as cavemen. I mean, back then it was cool to have a bird, but what good is a tiny little blue bird going to do when you have all the cave women flocking to you because you invented fire. They want to have you cave babies, but it's not going to happen with a little avian creature. So what did our ancestors do? They launched those tiny birds at pigs. It was then they that were able to harness the delicious pork products. And that's how bacon was invented.

So for crimson to be effective at all, it needs to be able to break the hold that angry birds has on the market. It needs to beat the game which tells the story of our ancestors inventing bacon so they could make sweet cave love to the cave women all night and populate the world.

So Crimson needs two things. Food and women. Those are the two most basic needs of life. We need food and we need to reproduce. Crimson must include a food greater than bacon. It will be a hard task, but I think we can do it. My personal suggestion would be deep fried butter, but we can decide that later.

Secondly we need women. Lots and lots of women. Bungie, if you're listening, I would place a call to Keira Knightley's agent. She is definitely a 10 and she knows how to play the pirate roll. Johnny Depp in a bikini might also be a little bit of a turn on. But definition some pirates with some skin showing would be clutch.

Angry Birds set the precedent. They built a best selling game by telling the tale of our ancestors getting women with bacon. Now Crimson needs to not just follow the blueprint, but follow the blueprint x10. We need MORE delicious foods and MORE women. That's the key. Hopefully Bungie knows what they're doing.


_____________________________________________________________ ________________

Original Post:


Not in a million years.



[Edited on 09.07.2011 4:01 PM PDT by Tom T]

  • 08.30.2011 5:45 PM PDT

http://www.maa.org/devlin/LockhartsLament.pdf

man you know me

Keira Knightley lacks the boobs to be a 10

  • 08.30.2011 5:46 PM PDT
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  • Fabled Legendary Member

They call me graland.

Posted by: it1345
Keira Knightley lacks the boobs to be a 10
It's a video game; they can make graphical adjustments.

  • 08.30.2011 5:47 PM PDT

http://www.maa.org/devlin/LockhartsLament.pdf

man you know me


Posted by: Garland
Posted by: it1345
Keira Knightley lacks the boobs to be a 10
It's a video game; they can make graphical adjustments.

Perhaps.

Really it needs at least two full nude sex scenes to take on angry birds. I mean, angry birds is a big, big game, and to take it on we have to give them something no ipod app has like N00B said.

Keria Knightley covered in whipped cream and cherries.

Really it's the only responsible thing Bungie could do with this game.

[Edited on 08.30.2011 5:50 PM PDT]

  • 08.30.2011 5:49 PM PDT

Defiantly agree.

  • 08.30.2011 5:50 PM PDT


Posted by: hihi100202
Defiantly agree.
Accidental typo?

  • 08.30.2011 5:51 PM PDT


Posted by: sargeantomeg4

Posted by: hihi100202
Defiantly agree.
Accidental typo?

Damn people fining my typos.
definitely

  • 08.30.2011 5:53 PM PDT
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  • Fabled Legendary Member

They call me graland.

We need an all-star cast of women. Add some Scarlett Johannson.

  • 08.30.2011 5:55 PM PDT

XBL: l Sonic l
PSN: Sonic_343

Angry Birds is overrated and not that fun IMO. I'm hoping Crimson will take it down.

  • 08.30.2011 5:58 PM PDT

http://www.maa.org/devlin/LockhartsLament.pdf

man you know me


Posted by: NAKED N00B
Posted by: it1345
Keira Knightley lacks the boobs to be a 10

Who would you suggest?

Replace entire crews of all the ships with famous women who have sex with each other if you win the battle.

Keira Knightley could definitely be included.

We should make up a list of those we would like to see included in crew selection.

  • 08.30.2011 5:59 PM PDT

Swag punks, fu­­ck off!

Angry birds is pretty dumb, I'm sure it will beat it.

  • 08.30.2011 6:00 PM PDT

An older gentleman once came up to me and said "There's no creativity left in the world of art, and if there is, I can't find it" and I just laughed and said "Well of course you can't, you can't find something unless you truly believe there is something there to be found." - Pacman

Misa Campo should definitely be in the game.

  • 08.30.2011 6:04 PM PDT

Hi

She has no breasts.

OT: Yes, it's obvious.

  • 08.30.2011 6:05 PM PDT

http://www.maa.org/devlin/LockhartsLament.pdf

man you know me


Posted by: NAKED N00B
Posted by: UndeadJon
Angry birds is pretty dumb, I'm sure it will beat it.

What part of launching birds at pigs do you consider dumb?

  • 08.30.2011 6:06 PM PDT

HAHAHA.

Oh wow...

No.

  • 08.30.2011 6:11 PM PDT

Swag punks, fu­­ck off!


Posted by: NAKED N00B
Posted by: UndeadJon
Angry birds is pretty dumb, I'm sure it will beat it.

What part of launching birds at pigs do you consider dumb?
It gets boring to me, sorry but I'm a little edgy right now.

  • 08.30.2011 6:11 PM PDT

Posted by: NAKED N00B
Hmm. I never thought of it that way. I appreciate your well constructed response, but I'm still going to have to disagree.

But when forming your opinions, have you considered the promiscuous nature of your mother and the embarrassing body odor?

Please, spare the childish ego boosting insults. It just makes you look like a pretentious ass.

Crimson is a strategy game, not a game you can mindlessly fling birds at towers. Therefore, it does not appeal to a wider audience and therefore it will not "take down Angry Birds".

Seriously, just because Bungie is publishing it doesn't mean it can take down the largest success in mobile gaming history. Run along now.

[Edited on 08.30.2011 6:29 PM PDT]

  • 08.30.2011 6:27 PM PDT
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  • Exalted Legendary Member

♫ & ☮
平和と愛


Posted by: Sonic343
Angry Birds is overrated and not that fun IMO. I'm hoping Crimson will take it down.

I also dislike Angry Birds; mainly because I'm horrible at it.

But since Crimson is exclusive to the iPad (correct?), it's going to be pretty damn hard to top Angry Birds which is on every iOS device.

  • 08.30.2011 6:30 PM PDT

Wake me, when you need me.

I thought crimson was just for the iPad? Or am I horribly mistaken?

  • 08.30.2011 6:40 PM PDT

http://www.maa.org/devlin/LockhartsLament.pdf

man you know me


Posted by: The U2 RoKKeR
Posted by: NAKED N00B
Hmm. I never thought of it that way. I appreciate your well constructed response, but I'm still going to have to disagree.

But when forming your opinions, have you considered the promiscuous nature of your mother and the embarrassing body odor?

Please, spare the childish ego boosting insults. It just makes you look like a pretentious ass.

Crimson is a strategy game, not a game you can mindlessly fling birds at towers. Therefore, it does not appeal to a wider audience and therefore it will not "take down Angry Birds".

Seriously, just because Bungie is publishing it doesn't mean it can take down the largest success in mobile gaming history. Run along now.

Hey, before MW2 they were the top in FPSes. Why not mobile stuff too?

  • 08.30.2011 6:42 PM PDT

only the best game ever.
~Sur Squishy
XBL: D a r k s t a r
PSN: darkstarrr
Minecraft: The_Dark_Star

Forum Rules | Terms of Use | Code of Conduct

Let's try to make this the second top-topic!?=)

[Edited on 08.30.2011 7:00 PM PDT]

  • 08.30.2011 6:59 PM PDT