Bungie.net Community
This topic has moved here: Subject: Bungie, announce your new IP right NOW!
  • Subject: Bungie, announce your new IP right NOW!
  • Pages:
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • of 4
Subject: Bungie, announce your new IP right NOW!

@Helveck

Just an Average Joe...

Or else I'll be really steaming mad. Even more mad than I am right now! You've done nothing for us, NOTHING! You guys are never around, never call, never write. It's pathetic how poor the interaction level is between you and your fans. You act as if you're busy and or tied up doing some important work within the depths of your office when really, we know you're doing practically nothing. Just sitting around with your feet on the desk giving each other back rubs eh? You make me sick. *Spits*

You tell us you're "going dark"? What the hell? Why would you turn the lights and computers off in your office!? It makes no sense! Obviously its because, as I said, you're doing nothing! You're all probably just sitting at the front desk with Jerome, playing Twister and Scrabble, drinking beers and eating beef jerky. All the while we, the Community, sit here and struggle with your absence every single day. The pain of your absence becoming more and more unbearable with each day being worst than the last... Don't lie to me Bungie. I know how you are and I know that you probably all see these forums day in and day out and laugh uncontrollably and hysterically at use while we wait in great anticipation for the coming of your next title. Which probably doesn't even exist.

In order for progress to be made... You MUST satisfy our wants and needs. That is your job... Your job isn't just about making games, it's about pleasing us, making us happy, giving us what we rightfully deserve. And as a citizen, I know my rights. YOU OWE US THIS!!!

So, in order to prevent me from going to the World Leaders to have them force their iron hand upon you, I will make some clear conditions that must be met in order for you to rectify this horrible situation that are hopefully seen as positive and constructive. If so I will do what I can to implement and assist with said guidelines without delay.

This list is as follows...

Caffiene intake:
#1. You will stop going to Starbucks. Coffee helps facilitate and induce ADHD behavior. How do I know this? I'm a mentalpsychologistanyalist behavioral doctor. Trust me.

Security:
#2. I will be sending a Dragon to Seattle. If you attempt to leave the Studio, the Dragon will either escort you back into the building, or eat you. But he is on a diet, so I would prefer that you just comply. The vet bill for a Dragon believe it or not is simply astronomical.

Break Time and Food Consumption:
#3. No food or drink allowed at your desk. You should be concentrating on your work. In fact, best to be safe... No food or drink at all.

Recreational Conversation:
#4. No talking. If you do speak you will be banished into the pillow pit of spikes. Whereby you will comfortably land on a bed of pillows, bean bags and spikes.

Bathroom Breaks:
#5.One bathroom break is permitted per day. And one only. You may use the garbage beside or beneath or desk for this.

Going Home and Vacation Time:
#6. Those interested in visiting with family members must achieve this luxury by receiving the great and sought after "1-Hour Leave" card. The card is gifted to those that fight between competitors until your opposition is vanquished. Once your opposition is beaten to a pulp, bloody and bruised (in the case that this is you) you will return to your desk immediately without aid or attention.

Work Approval and Reward System:
#7. All finalized work must be submitted to me before Midnight of each day. With my stamp of approval, you will be given a quarter glass of water as a tasty refreshment and reward for all of your beautiful and painstaking efforts.

In abiding by these rules I can almost assure both the Community and Bungie that I will have done a great deed for both parties in bringing forth without delay one of the greatest IP's we've seen to date, from any game developer to-date. A modest salary of $100,000 will suffice for my organizational services and I can implement then once the command is giving... But until then, I guess Bungie will continue to just leave us in the dark.

So, any supporters?

  • 01.24.2012 1:01 PM PDT
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

|Ask Your Ninja |
Any questions about anything, PM me. The only stupid question, is the one never asked.
"But, doctor...I am Pagliacci."
Posted by: bobcast
I hate you unless I'm drunk.

It was written in book somewhere but, there's a quote I know and its, 'Ask and ye shall receive'.

We're not asking Bungie...

WE'RE DEMANDING!!!!!

Or you know, whenever you're ready.

  • 01.24.2012 1:02 PM PDT

Your proposed dragon is no match for Jerome.

  • 01.24.2012 1:03 PM PDT

No signature found. Click here to change this.

I found a typo.

  • 01.24.2012 1:04 PM PDT

Best of random chance

I approve this message.

  • 01.24.2012 1:04 PM PDT

I fully support this.

  • 01.24.2012 1:05 PM PDT

@spawn031

"So much of what we do is ephemeral and quickly forgotten, even by ourselves, so it's gratifying to have something you have done linger in people's memories." John Williams

Posted by: Helveck
So, any supporters?

You betcha!

I am sick of this as well. We might as well just leave Bungie.net for Infinity Ward. Obviously the community should be in-charge of how Bungie interacts with the community. I mean the customers are always right, RIGHT?

I've been sitting here scouring on the mist of the internet day after day eating ramen noodles for this crap!? Come on Bungie! I know you can do this. I most certainly will be feeding this dragon lots of corpse before it gets to your studio so it knows where to go first! Not even a huge banhammer can stop it!

Also, I will be bringing lumpy pudding for the ride there.

  • 01.24.2012 1:07 PM PDT

I r guy who gun to teach u lesson


Posted by: Canadian Bac0nz
Your proposed dragon is no match for Jerome.

This OP, you seemed to have overlooked him. You stand no chance.

  • 01.24.2012 1:08 PM PDT

Creative Extremist

Twitter
YouTube

Parties? We don't need no stinking parties!

Posted by: Canadian Bac0nz
Your proposed dragon is no match for Jerome.

  • 01.24.2012 1:09 PM PDT

Have you seen my mind anywhere? I seem to have lost it...

0x0 x0x 0x0 000 000 x0x 000
x0x 0x0 0x0 0xx 000 0x0 000
x0x x0x x00 0xx 0x0 x0x 0x0

I have seen you future

Why don't you mention sleep?

You can't let them sleep!

  • 01.24.2012 1:20 PM PDT

Check out my Soundcloud account to hear some of my music.
Here's my twitter, in the off-chance you want that too.

Community Joe Interview: defnop552
Bye.

I have it on good authority, Helveck, that the Bungie employee's will be playing games all day long on the 27th of January. Prolonging our wait for the new IP.

Not only are they not creating or developing ideas, they are publicly boasting about what games they will play instead of creating interactive magic; COD MW3, DOTA 2 Beta, Forza 4, Puzzle Hunt, Cranium, Blongo Ball, Texas Hold 'Em, Dance Central 2 and Rock Band 3. All games that the employees plays to excess anyway!
These hours could be much better spent put to use creating grass so detailed that I will never want to leave my house again because the visual plethora that greets me outside will pale in comparison to Bungie's new IP.

So Helveck. I want you, nay, I NEED you to keep bungie chained to their desks like the moderators who patrol these Fori.

I want the new IP on my desk tomorrow morning.

Get it done!!

  • 01.24.2012 1:25 PM PDT

// Chapter
// My PC


2/15/12: Francisco Porras, I'll miss you. Rest in Peace.

Best idea EVER!
Posted by: Helveck
Break Time and Food Consumption:
#3. No food or drink allowed at your desk. You should be concentrating on your work. In fact, best to be safe... No food or drink at all.

  • 01.24.2012 1:28 PM PDT

Who the hell do you think I am?


Posted by: Hylebos
I fully support this.


^

  • 01.24.2012 1:29 PM PDT


Posted by: Hylebos
I fully support this.
Indeed.

  • 01.24.2012 1:32 PM PDT

I don't always ban people but when I do I laugh uncontrollably...that's if I was a Forum Ninja.

Truth is a matter of perception.

The Button

Can I borrow your dragon?

  • 01.24.2012 1:44 PM PDT
  •  | 
  • Exalted Mythic Member
  • gamertag: Rokitz
  • user homepage:

Want to know more about me? Check out my Community Joes interview.

Trying something once will increace your chances of success, because you tried it. Try someting twice, and your chances increase yet again - seeing as you've done it. Try something a few thousand times, and your chances of success is exponentially increased; this increase would likely provide success every time

Posted by: Hylebos
I fully support this.

Yes, you've always had a pleasant way with words Helveck.

  • 01.24.2012 1:45 PM PDT
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

Posted by: chotato
smart, interesting, seems out of place.


Official fan of Assassin's Creed, Call of Duty, (Problem with that?) Halo, and Bungie, also a total gaming junkie.

Beef jerky. Yum.

On topic.

Bungie, see the white SUV out on the street? It is filled with explosives and chemical weapons, and it detonating would be enough to decimate 2/3 of your studio. Tell me what your new IP is or I will blow the car up.

  • 01.24.2012 1:45 PM PDT
  •  | 
  • Fabled Mythic Member

R.I.P. DeathPimp. Never Ending Respect.

"Posted by: Kickimanjaro
I'm trying to become an '04, but it's not working too well."

Helveck, you remind me of that dude from 60 minutes

  • 01.24.2012 1:45 PM PDT

In a time long past, the armies of the dark came again to the lands of men. Their leaders became known as the fallen lords, and their terrible sorcery was without equal in the west.
In 30 years they reduced the civilized nations into carrion and ash. Until the free city of Madrigal alone defined them. An army gathered there, and a desperate battle was joined against the fallen
Heros were born in the fire and bloodshed of the wars which followed and their names and deeds will never be forgotten

LOL, A dragon can't stop Jerome.

As for this, Bungie is pulling the strings, expect a trained team of ninjas soon.

  • 01.24.2012 1:48 PM PDT

The Song Of Nephilim

Xenoblade <3


Posted by: Hylebos
I fully support this.

  • 01.24.2012 1:58 PM PDT

Would you rather have them release a mediocre dame now or a great game later.

  • 01.24.2012 1:59 PM PDT

@Helveck

Just an Average Joe...

I'm extremely pleased with all the support being brought forth.

As for this,

Posted by: CTN 0452 9
Why don't you mention sleep?

You can't let them sleep!


To even assume I would allow someone to blink while on the job let alone close their eyes for a nappy nap is simply preposterous.

[Edited on 01.24.2012 2:31 PM PST]

  • 01.24.2012 2:31 PM PDT
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

What? Got something against Yetis?

2 hour passes should be decided by knife-fights.

  • 01.24.2012 2:40 PM PDT

yas334229812


Posted by: Screecherz
I found a typo.

I found two.
And anyway how do we deal with those who rebel.

  • 01.24.2012 2:43 PM PDT

XBL: l Sonic l
PSN: Sonic_343

Your dragon better not destroy Seattle. I want to go to PAX Prime.

  • 01.24.2012 2:45 PM PDT

  • Pages:
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • of 4