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I would like to submit my application. Please seriously consider me for this position.
Posted by: x Foman123 x
Forum Ninja Application
1. User NameNone of your damn business. Frankly, I'm offended that you're delving into such a personal place right off the bat. I have to acknowledge my suspicions that this is less of an application, and more of an attempt to stalk us.
2. LocationThis lends itself to my earlier suspicion. I'm honestly considering contacting the FBI.
3. Why do you want to become a Forum Ninja?
I don't feel like playing by your rules. As such, I won't answer your multiple choice questions in your preferred format. I'd like to be a Ninja so that I may obtain information on you, Foman, and counter-stalk you. As recompense.
4. Please rank the current Forum Ninjas from hottest to ugliest. Absolutely none of you even approach what I'd call attractive. I in fact, find all of you quite revolting. Repugnant even. I am currently typing with one hand, as I use my other hand to hold my mouth closed, so I don't vomit all over my screen.5. Who is your favorite Forum Ninja and why did you pick Foman?I don't like any of you. I especially though, dislike you Foman. You're power hungry, ignorant, to quick to judge, and actually rather slow.6. You are in attendance at a hotel party at PAX and notice that Yoozel is facedown on the floor and appears to be attempting to "swim" towards the bathroom. Do you:
i'm going to simply ignore your scenario, because I could never stomach being in the same city as you, much less the same room. Instead, I'd like to once again express my general disdain for that Cube Headed Matt Damon. Matt Damon's head looks like a perfect cube, with hair. There, now I feel better.7. If you had to permaban one Bungie employee who would it be and why?What is Bungie?8. What is the best state-of-mind for moderating the forums? Uncontrollably twitterpated.9. Why is Lumpy pudding an essential necessity for all humankind? Explain, in detail, how its sudden disappearance would irrevocably lead to humanity's destruction.I took the liberty of inserting a better question here. I don't really care how you feel about it. Regardless, I still refuse to answer.10. Which of the following is an inappropriate reason to ban a member! I don't understand this question. So, I'm going to go back and delete the question mark, so it seems as though you're stating it, and also don't understand how English works.11. Please explain why the following statement is true:
"Everyone reading this did not bother to go back and see if I actually did replace the question mark? That's not a statement, that's a question. You seem to have somehow completely misunderstood what precisely is a statement, and what is a question. Incidentally, your syntax is atrocious. I recommend you let someone else handle the application process.
Purple Monkey Dishwasher
[Edited on 02.13.2012 8:39 PM PST]