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  • Subject: And now for something completely different...
Subject: And now for something completely different...
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  • Exalted Legendary Member

We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to ________________________..."
"Didn't catch that - copy your last, team leader," Central Command muttered through the comms.
"Sorry, command, dropped the radio," the team leader said softly, embarrassment audible in his now less-menacing voice. "You weren't meant to hear that, anyway - we are at a LAN party."

  • 05.14.2012 12:31 PM PDT

The Forerunner, the Great Journey, and Heaven Theory

[Announcement Trailer] Halo: Forerunner

Posted by: Agustus
I lol'd at the absurd miscommunication that occurs whenever dibbs post something. Perhaps his brain is so highly evolved that he can no longer clearly communicate with lesser life forms, even among his own species.

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to -", that was when I struck the lieutenant; an act worthy of a court martial no doubt, but I was long passed the point of caring. We were half a world away from our loved ones, fighting a war they had all most certainly forgotten about, and this final enemy counterattack on our last remaining base had all but destroyed the facade of invincibility our CO had been carefully constructing over the course of our tenure. With the lieutenant laying unconscious, the rest of the squad and I cut a hole in the rear fence and began our desertion into the jungle. No sooner had the humid jungle air enveloped us then a chance enemy mortar struck the napalm depot; enveloping the last testament to our presumptuousness in flame. As we trekked further into the unknown, my thoughts weren't about how we would get home, but rather how I would ever begin to explain to my family the things I had to do in order to survive.

  • 05.14.2012 12:32 PM PDT
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  • Veteran Legendary Member
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I was the first Spartan. And I will be the last. Mythic on 9/1/2012 never forget
PAX 08, Third Team against Luke and Shishka, AR dual to
the Death, won by one point... Assembly hasn't changed.

urk: "This is a bad idea."
DeeJ: "Hold still..."


"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to hug the enemy!" And on his command, all three hundred glistening armour clad Spartans rushed the enemy trenches with arms wide, and hearts ready. The Covenant, having no such physical interaction method, was complete dazed and confused to the onslaught of fuzzy feelings. Then suddenly, a grunt's head popped off. "Keep hugging men!" Barked the team leader; they had found their weakness. Scores of Elites, Grunts, Jackels, and even Hunters began spontaneously decapitating from the cerebral overload of emotion. Finally, with the last enemy freshly beheaded, the team leader calmly but firmly bellowed into his headpiece; "alright! everyone fall in! formation H!"
And with that, every spartan triumphantly came together for one big, manly, hug.

The end.

And a cookie for anyone who can spot a Led Zeppelin reference.

  • 05.14.2012 12:34 PM PDT

In a time long past, the armies of the dark came again to the lands of men. Their leaders became known as the fallen lords, and their terrible sorcery was without equal in the west.
In 30 years they reduced the civilized nations into carrion and ash. Until the free city of Madrigal alone defined them. An army gathered there, and a desperate battle was joined against the fallen
Heros were born in the fire and bloodshed of the wars which followed and their names and deeds will never be forgotten

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, form up and prepare to engage the enemy". It is a dark, stormy day as the evil hordes of the undead army crawl from the distance. Their general, an evil and dark figure emerges from the shadow of the dead proclaiming "Join me or die,! You cannot hope to win this battle". With a quick reply our very own general proclaims "I do not need to win the battle, I only need to kill you.". We are heavily outnumbered and moral among the men is dying just like the hordes of the undead warriors that surround us, but while I may not have the confidence of our commanding officer, I know that death awaits me, our men, our families, and the rest of the kingdom if we do surrender.

  • 05.14.2012 12:37 PM PDT

I am never late,Nor am I early; I arrive precisely when I mean to.
Also
"I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick -Potatoes!-... and I'm all out of bubblegum."

Check out this Thread on how to help new members here on Bungie.net

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare yourselves and don your helmets... Roll out the giant slingshot and prepare to launch.. Were taking the fight to them."

[Edited on 05.14.2012 12:53 PM PDT]

  • 05.14.2012 12:39 PM PDT

Have an addicition? Join Gamers Anon



Posted by: urk
Then there are the people who poop in the mash potatoes. Those people get launched out on their asses.

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to ________________________..."

...prepare to enter Ludacris Speed.

The stars pull back, the engines are revving at a fury. System panels blink as power is pulled from every resource available.

"Jenson! System status!"

"Sir, systems are failing. At this current speed, the ship will tear itself apart".

The Captain paces the bridge of the U.S.S Bnet. An aging but able ship. She has a few years easily left in her, but the Admirals committee has already decided it's time for decommission. Captain McLees has piloted this ship since it's birth. 20 years with the same ship, and it becomes part of you. So many battles, humanitarian missions, and now they want to hang it in some space museum. Out to pasture. Convalescence. That's if it makes it.

"Captain!", Jenson shouts. " Systems are failing all over! We need to reduce speed and consider making an about face..."

McLees stops pacing. Hands gripping the oak balusters on the bridge. Knuckles whitening.

"Tom", "Reduce speed". Prepare to meet the enemy head on.

McLees takes a lap around the bridge. Peering over the shoulders of the people he feels he may be bringing to death. He shuffles as the engines wind down.

As he makes his way back to the viewscreen he sees the stars come back into view. he hopes when the ship spins a 180 there will be nothing there.

But that's wishful thinking. 180 degrees, and he feels he is facing the end. He sit's in the Captains chair, flips the com, and addresses the team...

"All hands on deck!"

"Shields up!"

"Engage"



  • 05.14.2012 12:40 PM PDT
  • gamertag: ALI217
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I'm gonna finish it. Just like Jigga did to the pyramid.

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader, "all available units, prepare to engage!"
1>"Backlash-5 is preparing for bombing run," notified a calm voice over the radio.
2>The group of marines piled out of the UH-60 taking up defensive positions behind blocks of concrete just before a rocket tore through the air engulfing the chopper in flames.
3>"Defend this position with your lives." Barked the team leader, breathing heavily seconds before a .50 round punched through his chest creating a bloody crater the size of a watermelon in his back.
4>"Raptors on station." Blared the same voice over the radio as the scream of F-22s echoed throughout the battlefield accompanied by the sound of missiles ripping through the air smothering the enemy in a raging inferno.

EDIT : the numbers on the side of text are sentence numbers.

[Edited on 05.14.2012 2:30 PM PDT]

  • 05.14.2012 12:42 PM PDT

IIIIIII

It took some time writing this masterpiece. Please, appreciate this incredible work of art.

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to do numerous barrel rolls!"

  • 05.14.2012 12:42 PM PDT

-Watertribe-


Posted by: borrowedchief
I thought it can't go over 4 sentences?

  • 05.14.2012 12:43 PM PDT

In a time long past, the armies of the dark came again to the lands of men. Their leaders became known as the fallen lords, and their terrible sorcery was without equal in the west.
In 30 years they reduced the civilized nations into carrion and ash. Until the free city of Madrigal alone defined them. An army gathered there, and a desperate battle was joined against the fallen
Heros were born in the fire and bloodshed of the wars which followed and their names and deeds will never be forgotten


Posted by: borrowedchief
"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to ________________________..."

...prepare to enter Ludacris Speed.

The stars pull back, the engines are revving at a fury. System panels blink as power is pulled from every resource available.

"Jenson! System status!"

"Sir, systems are failing. At this current speed, the ship will tear itself apart".

The Captain paces the bridge of the U.S.S Bnet. An aging but able ship. She has a few years easily left in her, but the Admirals committee has already decided it's time for decommission. Captain McLees has piloted this ship since it's birth. 20 years with the same ship, and it becomes part of you. So many battles, humanitarian missions, and now they want to hang it in some space museum. Out to pasture. Convalescence. That's if it makes it.

"Captain!", Jenson shouts. " Systems are failing all over! We need to reduce speed and consider making an about face..."

McLees stops pacing. Hands gripping the oak balusters on the bridge. Knuckles whitening.

"Tom", "Reduce speed". Prepare to meet the enemy head on.

McLees takes a lap around the bridge. Peering over the shoulders of the people he feels he may be bringing to death. He shuffles as the engines wind down.

As he makes his way back to the viewscreen he sees the stars come back into view. he hopes when the ship spins a 180 there will be nothing there.

But that's wishful thinking. 180 degrees, and he feels he is facing the end. He sit's in the Captains chair, flips the com, and addresses the team...

"All hands on deck!"

"Shields up!"

"Engage"





I don't mean to be, THAT GUY, but I am REALLY confused on the rules.


Fill in the blank, and add no more than 4 additional sentences.


I had to make my story much smaller to only be 4 sentences after the opening quote but everyone is making massively long stores.

  • 05.14.2012 12:43 PM PDT

=(

My question to Alex Loret de Mola & John Shaffstall about Magic the Gathering will have wait another week.

I'll give some thought to the writing challenge and I'll have something tomorrow. Should be difficult, as my writing style is not succinct, it's far too verbose.

  • 05.14.2012 12:49 PM PDT

// Chapter
// My PC


2/15/12: Francisco Porras, I'll miss you. Rest in Peace.

I read the first part and was extremely excited, but then I finished the sentence...
Posted by: DeeJ
I will be giving you a glimpse at life in our studio with a story about something we are doing to herald the return of sunny skies in the Pacific Northwest (this is a metaphor about spring, not the end of darkness)

  • 05.14.2012 12:51 PM PDT

We're concerned

Cafe|MLP: FiM|Bnet Regulars|FCAW
Got a question, comment, or concern? PM me.

Aww, I wanted to ask what you guys thought of the Survivor finale...

Oh well.

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to rage at the winner of Survivor: One World. Kim did jack -blam!- and still won! They basically gave her the check for a million dollars half way through the season!"

  • 05.14.2012 12:53 PM PDT

“Oh, it’s a little bit of everything, it’s the mountains, it’s the fog, it’s the news at six o’clock, it’s the death of my first dog, it’s the angels up above me, it’s the song that they don’t sing, It’s a little bit of everything.”
- Dawes, A little bit of everything

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to defend this site at all costs!" The battle went on for hours, but they were no match for the onslaught.

Afterwards, the team leader lay wounded next to two of his men, everyone else was dead or dying and they just lay there waiting for the inevitable. A looming figure stepped over a mound of dead bodies, the leader looked up, staring this monster in the eyes, and he muttered his last words..."I never knew what Destiny was."

[Edited on 05.14.2012 1:04 PM PDT]

  • 05.14.2012 12:55 PM PDT

I want her...

We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to be sent west!

  • 05.14.2012 12:58 PM PDT
  • gamertag: [none]
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Do not waste your tears, I was not born to watch the world grow dim. Life is not measured in years, but by the deeds of men.

Posted by: goldhawk
We should know better, because we are better.


Posted by: DeeJ
"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to regroup at Firebase Bravo!" As one, dozens of army squad moved towards the designated area. When the eventual attack came, Bravo offered the best defensible position. They might not all survive the war. But they will die standing, holding the line.

  • 05.14.2012 1:05 PM PDT

Per Audacia Ad Astra

I feel like an absolute failure right now. I wrote all of that below before reading "and add no more than 4 additional sentences". Facepalm.



Posted by: DeeJ
"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to ________________________..."
...fire the final missile or we've had it!"
"Yes sir!" replied one of the team's soldiers. He quickly approached a cube that was roughly 5 feet high. It had a small screen on it with green numbers dashing and shifting about. Bullets flew past, some hitting the concrete wall that covered the team's units.
"What's it like up there, number 8?" the leader asked. Up above him on a crumbled and wrecked landing, number 8 - the team's designated marksman - scouted the area.
"Not good. We've got a maximum of 4 minutes before the enemy vehicles get within firing range." Through 8's high-powered scope, four floating hover-tanks rumbled their way down the opposing street. The heat from underneath them wobbled everything around them.
Back at the missile deployment cube (MDC), number 5 pulled hard at a red handle, the screen lit up and within seconds gave a live feed on their area within a 5 mile radius.

[Edited on 05.14.2012 1:09 PM PDT]

  • 05.14.2012 1:07 PM PDT


Posted by: Bungie Sam
I feel like an absolute failure right now. I wrote all of that below before reading "and add no more than 4 additional sentences". Facepalm.
Tis K. It looks like a lot of people aren't reading that part.

It made the results narrower for Deej at least!
:P

  • 05.14.2012 1:10 PM PDT

@spawn031

"So much of what we do is ephemeral and quickly forgotten, even by ourselves, so it's gratifying to have something you have done linger in people's memories." John Williams

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to ________________________..."
Inb4 this is the opening line of dialogue for Bungie's next project.

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units hold on to your potato's!

  • 05.14.2012 1:16 PM PDT

The world is not beautiful: And that, in a way, lends it a sort of beauty.

~Kino's Journey

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to burn them to dust!, activate defensive formation 7!".

The brave warriors huddled back to back, forming an almost geometric shape, to small to be an octagon, to large to be a hexagon.

The six brave warriors readied their refraction beams, desperately waiting for their leader's signal,

"Today men, we stand here on this mound of dirt, as the last remnants of our once proud race, when you set fire to your enemies, know that they are burning with the hatred of all that have fallen before them, now..............................ATT-
"Um, Alex?"
"Yes Jason?"
"Well, you didn't bring a magnifying glass so this may be a bit tricky"
"Don't worry, i have a secret weapon"
Alex pulled out something from his jacket, a holy weapon made of the finest wood and rubber $5 could buy.
"Now this time, and no interruptions.....................FIRE THE SLINGSHOTS!"
"..................your the only one with a slingshot Alex"
"No matter, we must destroy these ants before the bagocalypse"
"you mean when your mom finishes the bagels?"
"Just burn the dam ants"

And this my friends, was how Bungie, and the legend of the Giant slingshot, were formed.

[Edited on 05.14.2012 1:17 PM PDT]

  • 05.14.2012 1:17 PM PDT
  • gamertag: [none]
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Well spank my balls and call me Santa, it's Easter already!




"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to grate the Stilton..."

But Toms hands were sweaty and moist, and they slipped, slicing his wrist on the kitchen utensils serrated edge. As blood pumped out of his arm, the fairy armadillo relaxed, sipping his ice cold glass of cherry aids. Upstairs, Uncle Pete was fixing the baby blender, while in the aquarium, the conga eels were, in a controversial twist, doing an Irish jig. Meanwhile, the toast, much to Stosh's horror, was both lukewarm and mobilizing.



[Edited on 05.14.2012 2:10 PM PDT]

  • 05.14.2012 1:18 PM PDT

cry! But then watermelons started falling from the sky. The enemies were forced to retreat. Fructose was banned everywhere and the world was safe once again. They had found Forrester.

  • 05.14.2012 1:21 PM PDT

Key

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available unites, prepare to fall back to your transports!"

Now, of course, Alex had no immediate recognition of these words having just recently evacuated the entirety of his bowels into his cargo pants after seeing the immense hoard of yellow on the horizon that was the Western Legion. After a few moments of internal reflection on how incredibly terrible it would be if he was shot and killed sometime in the next few seconds the private drew him self up to his fullest altitude, performed the quickest about face he had done in his entire 2 month military career, and promptly sprinted in as disorganized a fashion as he could manage so as to not stand out among the crowd of other panicking, fleeing teenagers.

Diving, in what Alex felt to be an appropriately dramatic manner given the current circumstances, into the back of his squadrons transport vehicle, Alex spun on the spot. As he lie there, drenched from the afternoon's torrential downpour, covered nearly from nose to toes in a thick layer of now-drying mud, he managed to catch one last glimpse of the military might that was the Western Legion beginning to lay waste to the small farming village that it had oh-so-recently been his sworn duty to defend.


Don't believe it's only an additional 4 sentences? Fight me.

Don't believe they're legitimate sentences? Fight me.

Have a problem with any of my grammar? Fight me.

Have a problem with me using the word "lie" when I might have had to have used "lay" because I'm still not sure as to the significance of their distinction? Please explain... and then fight me.

[Edited on 05.14.2012 1:28 PM PDT]

  • 05.14.2012 1:22 PM PDT
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  • Senior Heroic Member
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"My Body is trying to Die..." - Caboose

We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to charge! The young Capitan looked at the other men, all willing to die for the Great Republic. The first wave got out of the threnches and mowed down by enemy machine gun fire. He and the next wave got up and ran, but he was hit. As he died, he thought of his loving family, and took his last gasp of air.

  • 05.14.2012 1:24 PM PDT

If I were capable of laughter you would hear it bellow from my various apertures.

Posted by: DeeJ

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader.  "All available units, prepare to ________________________...".


"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to disembark current path." Team Leader Colonel Leon dove down first, smoke rising from his feet, as he closed the gap between the whirring gears and sails of their monstrosities in the sky and our hodgepodge of crippled v-formations. Not a second passed before I saw a plume of scathing plasma jump from his dorsal-wings to his fleshy body, completely mechanically unaltered, as he crashed and careened down the side of what appeared to be a newly assembled forcefield... he must've died on impact. And though I knew too well what our assailants wanted, I knew not well enough why they were destined to win. As the rest of our squadron followed the Colonel's already doomed path down to infinity, all completely unaware of his demise, I remembered my daughter, and how she used to sing, and I knew then more than I had ever known before, that my ears would be filled with her music soon enough, and that we would be rid of this silence, finally happy, once and for all.

  • 05.14.2012 1:34 PM PDT