Bungie.net Community
This topic has moved here: Subject: And now for something completely different...
  • Subject: And now for something completely different...
Subject: And now for something completely different...
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

Posted by: DeeJ
"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to________________________..."
fire the Ling-Ling cannon at the enemy!
Suddenly, the enemy heard a great howl from ahead which echoed violently around the canyons - it was time.
"FIRE!" shouted the team leader. Out of nowhere, a beam of red light shone towards the enemies. At the end of the beam, a severed dog head cast an evil grin down upon the team's foes. All was lost; as the dog head landed slap-bang in the centre of the enemy troops, blood flew everywhere casting a strong crimson-red shadow upon all objects around it; the enemy had been obliterated to smithereens - and shortly after impact, a tiny bark penetrated the solid dimensional walls of the spirit world; the team had unleashed Hell.

  • 05.15.2012 5:19 AM PDT

Dead Mans Hand-Always Loaded.

I WAS SOCK

Posted by: UnderTheKnif3
"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader.
"All available units, prepare to ________________________
You have every last vote of mine.

  • 05.15.2012 5:31 AM PDT
  •  | 
  • Elder Mythic Member

anyone who's played more than you has no life

anyone who's played less than you is a noob

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to ..."


Punctured.

This was pure - no pain, no spraying blood, no sounds. Each thud of her heart washed waves of euphoria over her, as she steadied herself on the railing; leaking.

It was in this moment, faced with all she had ever known - fire and blood - that she felt infinity rushing over her.

  • 05.15.2012 5:35 AM PDT
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

I'm placing you on the hitlist.

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to ________________________..."

surrender at once for this is planet Khaleesi where all the inhabitants look like Emilia Clarke and all have never known men.
Just remember if the egg these women carry start to hatch you may or may not be the father.

  • 05.15.2012 7:04 AM PDT

Have I told you I love you, Deej? I love you.


"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to go all in, or die like the hardy bastards I know you are!" The men bellowed out a battlecry worthy of their just cause as the food in the cafeteria showed no signs of stopping, or remorse. One by one the troopers fell victim to their enemy. "The men can't eat no more, sir.....we're going to die here," cried Michael, his face showing the realization that death was just around the salad bar. "I know.... but at least I have chicken," said the team leader with a tone of defeat, but a sense of relief, for death had been delicious and merciful.

[Edited on 05.15.2012 8:41 AM PDT]

  • 05.15.2012 7:55 AM PDT
  • gamertag: S034
  • user homepage:

Gettin' all Herodotean up in here!


"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to--"

No one would ever find out what they were supposed to prepare for, because at that moment one of the creatures plummeted from the trees above them, retractable claws ripping through the team leader's throat and spinal column. As he crumpled, the beast whirled through the team's formation, a frenzied mass of claws and fur and gore, splattering bones and blood and grey matter for dozens of meters in every direction, leaving the leaves and roots of the forest floor slick and sanguine. As the last of the soldiers fell to the earth, the beast drew itself to its full three meter height in the center of the ring of annihilation it had wrought and sighed. More would come, it knew, and more would die, because despite three months of disastrously unmitigated slaughter, three months of failure after failure, three months of utter destruction and despair, the humans had not figured out that this forest, this world, would never be theirs.

  • 05.15.2012 8:32 AM PDT

I'm surprised to find most stories kept to the Halo universe. I still can't believe I read all of them too. I'm really liking Geegs story.

Posted by: Red_Gravemind
"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to get funky!"

Oooooh, the stories that could be made with this one.

[Edited on 05.15.2012 8:40 AM PDT]

  • 05.15.2012 8:39 AM PDT

To infinity, and beyond!
UNSC Leviathan

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to blame stosh." "Preparing to blame stosh" shouted all available units. "Blame stosh." "Blaming stosh."

[Edited on 05.15.2012 8:51 AM PDT]

  • 05.15.2012 8:51 AM PDT

La-hoo, Za-her.

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to fall back to defensive positions!"

"Luke, dinner's ready. Time to turn off your starcrafts."

"But MOOOOOOOM!"

"Now, young man!"

  • 05.15.2012 10:06 AM PDT

Why did you click the more button? By accident? Reply is at the bottom...
They call me The Precursor



"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to dig in and hold this position!" In half of their minds, there was false hope, denial. Repetition of the words "It'll all be fine". The other half just sat, cold, wiping the ice cold from their visors, they knew what was about to happen, they knew they couldn't outrun their fate. But they were sure as hell gonna try...

The Blizzard was kicking up, the team began to get anxious, they were at least trying to find some consolidation in being able to attempt to stop what was going to kill them. Their vision was beginning to leave them. Flashlight's were dying, it had been hours since anyone spoke. The question was at the back of everyone's throat. Should they get up and go? Were they being watched? Well, that question would answer itself...

A small vibration occurred in the ground, then another, and another. Avalanche? No. The team's head's darted around where was it? No one spoke. After a few more vibrations, which turned into loud rumbles, the noises location was verified. It got closer, and closer. Then, the team leader reached for the generator. It slowly clampered up, the light faded in, showing the outline. Then, bang. Full power. The team stared remotely at the huge figure in front of them. A massive T-rex stood there. Silence, then, a huge roar as it charged towards them. "Open fire!" Bullets roared back at the monster, as it bit and tore at the flesh of a screaming soldier. But that wasn't the worst of it, soon they were overwhelmed by raptors, bullets flew in all directions, but in the end, their attempts were worth nothing, just as they had expected. But then, just before the last of them fell. A light in the distance...

  • 05.15.2012 10:22 AM PDT

My Top 5 games of all time
1. Fallout 3
2. Super Mario 64
3. Halo CE
4. Gmod
5. Rachet and Clank

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to release the furries!" No sooner did the order come out when four platoons of battle hard furries came onto the field with "swords" in hand the rushed forth to defeat the enemy.
The enemy screamed in terror and in some strange cases pleasure. Many of the enemy were slaughtered by the Furry onslaught that left behind a battlefield cover in white and red.
Innocent civilians were caught in the cross fire and many perished to a very horriable and sticky demise. The battle was won for the Empire of Strange Erotica Fanatics and it ended with a "group celebration".
THE END

[Edited on 05.15.2012 10:41 AM PDT]

  • 05.15.2012 10:39 AM PDT

Revvin' up your engine,
Listen to her howlin' roar,
Metal under tension,
Beggin' you to touch and go!


Posted by: DeeJ
"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to ________________________..."


____...lay down a suppressing fire and fall back to the wall."

We were all frightened by the sudden emergence of the Grunt.

Enemy troops unleashed the abomination right after we crossed that intersection with the wall of fame and the road to oblivion.
Sergeant Serious flew through the air after making a brave move luring the horror away from his unit, his destiny is uncertain.

The moment we got back to the wall only 7 of our unit were left and while our team leader was in total brain-lock I shouted : "Come on ,DeeJ, Let's go party!"

  • 05.15.2012 10:40 AM PDT
  •  | 
  • Honorable Member
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

Signatures are for losers! Oh wait, now I'm loser! Well, both the cake and this signature is a lie!


Posted by: DeeJ

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to"

...Get crazy from meeting our foe! That's right, we are going to face the evil three legged chipmunks of the washing machine! They shall meet our special equipment called detergent and water! Wash them all!

  • 05.15.2012 11:09 AM PDT

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to blast 'Disco Inferno' by The Trammps," shouted General Groove. Then, in a magnificent unison, the entire UTAH rebellion broke out in song and dance as disco balls rained down upon the Vampire Legion Blood Brothers. "Burn, baby Burn!" sang the UTAH rebels as the sunlight broke through the morning darkness, and lit the Vampire Blood Brothers on fire, melting them into a disgusting pool of melted capes, hair gel, and frail bone.

  • 05.15.2012 12:15 PM PDT

Posted by: T1B3R7uMB0YXVI
Chief vs the scarab? I find that hard to believe to roundhouse boot the scarab's figurative emotion out of the gaming zone.

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to flee!" As the army of delicious, crispy bacon strips began to break into a full route, the colossal hand of the Grinnial slammed onto the plate behind them. With one mighty sweep, the tastiest troops in the land of Kitchen were swept down into that hellish maw, never to be seen or heard from again. Satisfied, the Grinnial plodded off to the nearby kingdom of Living-Room to conquer the near-impenetrable sofa fortress with the grand strategy of "nap" firmly in mind.

  • 05.15.2012 12:40 PM PDT
  • gamertag: [none]
  • user homepage:

"We are wide open to attack!" shouted the team leader. "All available units, prepare to sacrifice your lives!"

I looked around in panic, like a child whose lost his mother at the playground, for a loophole. Enemy missiles were approximately three clicks north and coming in hot. The missiles quickly came in and a bright light erupted as my soul waved goodbye to my body. Then I opened my eyes and saw salvation.

[Edited on 05.15.2012 12:46 PM PDT]

  • 05.15.2012 12:42 PM PDT

There is more than enough here to make the contest interesting. I am calling the contest early. That's right!

Thanks for participating. Check back tomorrow for the voting that will select a winner. I am thinking mid-afternoon.

  • 05.15.2012 12:57 PM PDT