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I was not joking, and would like to be able to get a sword. Also, why not, lightning bolts too.
You know the market is there too, because of that RP thread. RPers love novelty paraphernalia. Especially in the form of a weapon.
Oh, and I didn't comment on the actual story. Looked like an awesome day. Am jelly all the way around, in every aspect, and every way.