- MyNameIsCharlie
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- Fabled Mythic Member
Studies show that men think about sex every 7 seconds. I do my best to eat hotdogs in under 6, just so things don't get weird.
Please allow me to introduce Myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
I've been around for a long, long year
Stole many a man's soul and faith
Posted by: BaghdadBean
What I can't believe is that not a single one of you have mentioned brick cheese, spam, beanie weenies, or vienna sausages. It might be an age thing... I'm guessing since most of the flood is under 18, you guys may have missed out on the finer things of life in the golden age. Still, somebody needs to bring up the glorious golden rectangle that was brick cheese, wrapped in its super greasy, supremely waxed dingy gray cardboard box, and heralded as one of the most important commodities on Reservations all across America. I know you non-native kids would have gotten a shot at it too, if you were truly dirt poor, since it was also added to holiday food baskets and used as a staple in foodbanks nation wide.
With that block of cheese, some tortillas, or some homemade fry bread (also made with government issued commodity flour, you know, the kind that was the whitest thing you've ever seen on the planet, other than all those tiny little black weevil bugs that just added crunchiness to your baked goods because they were small enough to go through the sifter and couldn't be killed with anything that wouldn't also poison your kids), you could live forever. Well, you know, minus the horrid lactose intolerance and diabetes that are also Rez staples of life.
And Spam... glorious, glorious Spam, for those special paydays where you actually had an extra $1.50 for a can of Spam after paying off your two bills of the month (the two you skipped last month to pay the other two bills). Spam fried up in a cast iron skillet, and then floated in brick cheese between two tortillas... now that's living high on the hog!
Spam?
Brother, we rocked the companion to the government cheese, the free Ham Patties.
For the uninitiated, you hear about the "Government Cheese" that was handed out in the 80's. What you don't hear about is the can of Ham Patties that came with it. They were like hamburgers, but made with ground up pork.
I remember those two fondly. The government cheese bore a strong resemblance to the cheapest store brand Velveeta knock off.
That and the free peanut butter in the green foil.