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Subject: Describe your last encounter with a female

If I haven't fired you yet, it's because I'm still firing your mom in bed.

Me: What's this white stuff on the floor?

Her: Oh, I dropped a sauce packet and it splattered everywhere.

Me: You should clean that up before people walk in it and smear it everywhere.

Her: No. You lick it up.

Me: Pfff, that's YOUR job

Her: I will hit you.

Me: You can't tell me what to do; you're not my wife!

Her: Not yet.

Me: oh sh-

  • 12.16.2012 6:03 PM PDT
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Odyssey Genesis

Me: Can I fondle your dirty pillows

Female: 5uRE 7h1ng 8r0

I caress her funbags

WWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

  • 12.16.2012 6:08 PM PDT

Save Lives. Go Vegan.

Dylan_Mulenburg@hotmail.com

Does online count? If so, talking on Skype a half hour or so ago. If not, talking to my mom last night (assuming minor interactions like exchanging a few words don't count).

  • 12.16.2012 6:11 PM PDT
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Kissed my girlfriend goodbye.

  • 12.16.2012 6:12 PM PDT

“I didn't want to wake up. I was having a much better time asleep. And that's really sad. It was almost like a reverse nightmare, like when you wake up from a nightmare you're so relieved. I woke up into a nightmare.”

I'd get banned.

  • 12.16.2012 6:12 PM PDT

Sparkle Sparkle Sparkle!

"Oh God! Keep going, Mom!"

  • 12.16.2012 6:13 PM PDT

Want Coup? Here it is for Chrome.

[url=http://iggyhopper.dyndns.org/gm/extensions/coup_d_bungie _4.crx[/url]

Okay, cya mom.

  • 12.16.2012 6:13 PM PDT

I am assuming direct control.

Oh hello there OP's mom.

Wait, why are you taking your clothing off?

Stop it! I would never do this to OP, but then again, you working dat body guuuuuurl.

*35 minutes later*

That was like the best of all time.

  • 12.16.2012 6:15 PM PDT

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