- Decieved Soul
- |
- Heroic Member
we both know nobody cares about me. Maybe 2 or 3. That's it. You included. If I died tomorrow, no matter how, I bet you nobody would care after the first week of me being gone. I'm sorry that you have feelings for me and that it makes it hard on you. But that isn't my fault. I didn't do that. Nobody picked that. But that doesn't make it just hard on you. It makes it hard for me too. I don't hangout with you because of it. I'd kill him if he was best friends with some girl who had feelings for him. Especially if they hangout. I can't please everyone. I was trying my best. I'm sorry that wasn't good enough for you. I'm sorry that I can't be what you want. I'm sorry I'm dating him and despite him upsetting me here and there, he cares about me. Surprise. That boy has done a lot for me. And most of the time I'm already upset and don't say anything and he says one little insignificant thing and it sets me off. Because it builds up. It isn't always him. And I know it seems that way but it isn't. It's just what sets me off sometimes. I'm sick of hearing about how "horrible he is" and how "miserable he makes me" because that isn't really the case. I'm a -blam!- up sad depressed crazy person. And it's constant. And sometimes he just brings that out a little more. He isn't the only one who does it either. It isn't like I chose this. It isn't like I want to be sad constantly. It's horrible and I hate it and I hate that other people go through what I do too. But I can't fix it. If I leave Brody, it will be worse. I know that because I tried it. I know what I'm doing may not seem like it, but it's the best for me. At least right now. I'm sorry you can't accept that. I'm sorry that my life pisses you off and I'm sorry is pushed you to the point where you don't want to deal with me any more. I'm sorry I'm not -blam!- perfect. But if you're really going to leave me alone, especially today, on these terms, and after what you've said to me, then no. I don't care. Because you obviously don't care as much as you say. If that's what's gonna happen. Thank you for contributing to my -blam!- day.
Ps. I'm not trying to guilt you, I'm being -blam!- honest.wtf