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Subject: This seems excessively selfish to me.

There just aren't enough moments in the day to rectify the wrongs of the past.

I was watching TV when a Cancer Treatment commercial came up. It was talking about the case of a husband and his wife, the wife had just found out she was diagnosed with Cancer, can't remember the exact location of it, and here was her husband, blubbering and crying because his wife had Cancer, not him.

Now i understand they're married, but it seems excessively selfish that the husband is crying like a baby when he in no way has any ailments of his own at that time, and it's the wife suffering through this, and he has the gall to be talking about how he had to get himself in to see a Therapist, when he should instead be staying strong and keeping a positive outlook while his wife is going through treatments and everything.

Anyone understand my frustration with this?

  • 01.07.2013 2:48 PM PDT

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Posted by: AgileNaruto001

Anyone understand my frustration with this?

Nope.

  • 01.07.2013 2:49 PM PDT

I see where you're coming from but the person he loves could possibly die. Though I do think around her he should be strong. If he wants to cry he should do it away fro her and be supportive while she's there.

  • 01.07.2013 2:49 PM PDT

Love your friends, Die laughing.

I cried when my dog died.

I guess I'm selfish too.

  • 01.07.2013 2:50 PM PDT

If I were him, I'd keep it to myself, and stay strong, but honestly, I wouldn't really condemn it for being selfish, maybe just thoughtless.

  • 01.07.2013 2:50 PM PDT

My dad had cancer and it was tougher on my mom. She had to tube feed him three times a day since the chemo and radiation made him temporarily unable to produce saliva and it caused many many many ulcers to form in his mouth. Along with this she always had to stay around with him and help him out as a big radiation burn formed on his neck and all. It's really tough on the partner and family, just to see their loved one like this or knowing that they can die.

It isn't over-reacting at all.

  • 01.07.2013 2:51 PM PDT

The human element always mucks things up.

Posted by: abelsinh
I cried when my dog died.

I guess I'm selfish too.


Nah, just a pansy.

  • 01.07.2013 2:51 PM PDT
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Posted by: ListenClosely
bane: lets not stand on ceremony here mr wayne
batman: ok
bane: your punishment must be more severe
batman: im gothams rekoning
bane: me too
batman: oh

You're right OP, I saw a guy crying over his kid getting hit and run'ed once and I called him selfish.

  • 01.07.2013 2:51 PM PDT

Finding out a loved one may soon be taken from you and then crying is selfish?

What?

  • 01.07.2013 2:51 PM PDT


Posted by: BSS Lazer
I see where you're coming from but the person he loves could possibly die. Though I do think around her he should be strong. If he wants to cry he should do it away fro her and be supportive while she's there.


This. Whenever in situations where someone is in real need, I try to stay as strong as I can so that they can have something to hold onto. Once I'm out of the room or away from them I believe it is okay to break down.

  • 01.07.2013 2:53 PM PDT

Love your friends, Die laughing.


Posted by: Egerspurge
Posted by: abelsinh
I cried when my dog died.

I guess I'm selfish too.


Nah, just a pansy.


Well, after 15 years, it wasn't easy saying goodbye.

  • 01.07.2013 2:53 PM PDT
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Egoism expresses love; the man is upset that his loved one is in hard treatment and caused depression.


Read some psychoanalysis boy.

  • 01.07.2013 2:54 PM PDT

There just aren't enough moments in the day to rectify the wrongs of the past.


Posted by: bergXX09
My dad had cancer and it was tougher on my mom. She had to tube feed him three times a day since the chemo and radiation made him temporarily unable to produce saliva and it caused many many many ulcers to form in his mouth. Along with this she always had to stay around with him and help him out as a big radiation burn formed on his neck and all. It's really tough on the partner and family, just to see their loved one like this or knowing that they can die.

It isn't over-reacting at all.

Of course i can understand the predicament of the partner, it's impossible to not be sad. But showing weakness in front of someone suffering from Cancer or any other fatal disease is just thoughtless and uncaring. They should be showing no weakness, and be there night and day at the person's side. Because really, as soon as the partner starts crying and giving up, it really reduces the morale of the person fighting the disease, and it's shown to have an effect on the person's recovery.

  • 01.07.2013 2:54 PM PDT

There just aren't enough moments in the day to rectify the wrongs of the past.


Posted by: Mr Libertarian
Egoism expresses love; the man is upset that his loved one is in hard treatment and caused depression.


Read some psychoanalysis boy.

I love studying Psychology, took a course of it before, but you obviously can't understand my reasoning here boy.

  • 01.07.2013 2:55 PM PDT

I feel ya man.
It seems like he's crying because he feels bad for himself. All like "O woe is me, for I'm the husband of a cancer patient!" He ought to be, like you said, staying positive and helping his wife do the same.

  • 01.07.2013 2:56 PM PDT
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Posted by: AgileNaruto001

Posted by: bergXX09
My dad had cancer and it was tougher on my mom. She had to tube feed him three times a day since the chemo and radiation made him temporarily unable to produce saliva and it caused many many many ulcers to form in his mouth. Along with this she always had to stay around with him and help him out as a big radiation burn formed on his neck and all. It's really tough on the partner and family, just to see their loved one like this or knowing that they can die.

It isn't over-reacting at all.

Of course i can understand the predicament of the partner, it's impossible to not be sad. But showing weakness in front of someone suffering from Cancer or any other fatal disease is just thoughtless and uncaring. They should be showing no weakness, and be there night and day at the person's side. Because really, as soon as the partner starts crying and giving up, it really reduces the morale of the person fighting the disease, and it's shown to have an effect on the person's recovery.


You are now arguing in the name of defending yourself against everyone else, so there is no point in talking to you since the discussion obviously is the IAMRITURNOT talk.

Again, people have egoism, you too; no one here is an altruist and say "ah oh well, I must look after someone else now".

  • 01.07.2013 2:57 PM PDT

Posted by: Recon Number 54
Use your head. The one on your shoulders. No really, just try. Please?

˙sɹǝʇndɯoɔ ɥʇıʍ pooƃ os ʇou ɯ,ı 'ǝɹǝɥ ʇǝƃ sıɥʇ pıp ʍoɥ 'lol

His wife has a potentially terminal illness and he is upset by that. If you can't empathize with that, here's hoping you never get married.

  • 01.07.2013 2:59 PM PDT

There just aren't enough moments in the day to rectify the wrongs of the past.


Posted by: Mr Libertarian

Posted by: AgileNaruto001

Posted by: bergXX09
My dad had cancer and it was tougher on my mom. She had to tube feed him three times a day since the chemo and radiation made him temporarily unable to produce saliva and it caused many many many ulcers to form in his mouth. Along with this she always had to stay around with him and help him out as a big radiation burn formed on his neck and all. It's really tough on the partner and family, just to see their loved one like this or knowing that they can die.

It isn't over-reacting at all.

Of course i can understand the predicament of the partner, it's impossible to not be sad. But showing weakness in front of someone suffering from Cancer or any other fatal disease is just thoughtless and uncaring. They should be showing no weakness, and be there night and day at the person's side. Because really, as soon as the partner starts crying and giving up, it really reduces the morale of the person fighting the disease, and it's shown to have an effect on the person's recovery.


You are now arguing in the name of defending yourself against everyone else, so there is no point in talking to you since the discussion obviously is the IAMRITURNOT talk.

Again, people have egoism, you too; no one here is an altruist and say "ah oh well, I must look after someone else now".

Yes, you can clearly interpret my motives and inner feelings from that post. Do you think yourself a harbinger of knowledge to say that what i'm doing is to prove i'm more right than anyone else? Check your narcissism at the door, i don't need you in my topic when your only goal is to try and make me look like the bad guy.

  • 01.07.2013 3:00 PM PDT
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Posted by: AgileNaruto001

Posted by: Mr Libertarian
Egoism expresses love; the man is upset that his loved one is in hard treatment and caused depression.


Read some psychoanalysis boy.

I love studying Psychology, took a course of it before, but you obviously can't understand my reasoning here boy.



Then you would know that there is a major pyschosocio influence upon the person and acting irrational since you didn't consider it would appear that your either you're bluffing that you studied the course or you just failed misearbly on it.

Check out Ego defense Mechanisms.

  • 01.07.2013 3:00 PM PDT
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Posted by: AgileNaruto001
Now i understand they're married, but it seems excessively selfish that the husband is crying like a baby when he in no way has any ailments of his own at that time, and it's the wife suffering through this

I'm guessing you don't understand empathy. Or something similar. Why wouldn't you be upset that you wife has cancer? I'd expect anyone married to be more upset if their spouse is hurt, rather than themself.

  • 01.07.2013 3:01 PM PDT

There just aren't enough moments in the day to rectify the wrongs of the past.


Posted by: I 5ee You
I feel ya man.
It seems like he's crying because he feels bad for himself. All like "O woe is me, for I'm the husband of a cancer patient!" He ought to be, like you said, staying positive and helping his wife do the same.

Exactly, thank you for actually getting what i'm saying.

  • 01.07.2013 3:03 PM PDT
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GT: Clerks

I find it selfish that you are taking away from the grieving partner of a cancer patient by complaining on a forum... Am I doing it right?

  • 01.07.2013 3:05 PM PDT
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Posted by: AgileNaruto001

Posted by: Mr Libertarian

Posted by: AgileNaruto001

Posted by: bergXX09
My dad had cancer and it was tougher on my mom. She had to tube feed him three times a day since the chemo and radiation made him temporarily unable to produce saliva and it caused many many many ulcers to form in his mouth. Along with this she always had to stay around with him and help him out as a big radiation burn formed on his neck and all. It's really tough on the partner and family, just to see their loved one like this or knowing that they can die.

It isn't over-reacting at all.

Of course i can understand the predicament of the partner, it's impossible to not be sad. But showing weakness in front of someone suffering from Cancer or any other fatal disease is just thoughtless and uncaring. They should be showing no weakness, and be there night and day at the person's side. Because really, as soon as the partner starts crying and giving up, it really reduces the morale of the person fighting the disease, and it's shown to have an effect on the person's recovery.


You are now arguing in the name of defending yourself against everyone else, so there is no point in talking to you since the discussion obviously is the IAMRITURNOT talk.

Again, people have egoism, you too; no one here is an altruist and say "ah oh well, I must look after someone else now".

Yes, you can clearly interpret my motives and inner feelings from that post. Do you think yourself a harbinger of knowledge to say that what i'm doing is to prove i'm more right than anyone else? Check your narcissism at the door, i don't need you in my topic when your only goal is to try and make me look like the bad guy.


http://www.nytimes.com/2011/06/15/arts/people-argue-just-to-w in-scholars-assert.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0

  • 01.07.2013 3:05 PM PDT

There just aren't enough moments in the day to rectify the wrongs of the past.


Posted by: Mr Libertarian

Posted by: AgileNaruto001

Posted by: Mr Libertarian

Posted by: AgileNaruto001

Posted by: bergXX09
My dad had cancer and it was tougher on my mom. She had to tube feed him three times a day since the chemo and radiation made him temporarily unable to produce saliva and it caused many many many ulcers to form in his mouth. Along with this she always had to stay around with him and help him out as a big radiation burn formed on his neck and all. It's really tough on the partner and family, just to see their loved one like this or knowing that they can die.

It isn't over-reacting at all.

Of course i can understand the predicament of the partner, it's impossible to not be sad. But showing weakness in front of someone suffering from Cancer or any other fatal disease is just thoughtless and uncaring. They should be showing no weakness, and be there night and day at the person's side. Because really, as soon as the partner starts crying and giving up, it really reduces the morale of the person fighting the disease, and it's shown to have an effect on the person's recovery.


You are now arguing in the name of defending yourself against everyone else, so there is no point in talking to you since the discussion obviously is the IAMRITURNOT talk.

Again, people have egoism, you too; no one here is an altruist and say "ah oh well, I must look after someone else now".

Yes, you can clearly interpret my motives and inner feelings from that post. Do you think yourself a harbinger of knowledge to say that what i'm doing is to prove i'm more right than anyone else? Check your narcissism at the door, i don't need you in my topic when your only goal is to try and make me look like the bad guy.


http://www.nytimes.com/2011/06/15/arts/people-argue-just-to-w in-scholars-assert.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0


So what is your point you are trying to make? After reading that, aren't you committing the same hypocrisy you claim to be against? You're using your own analytical reasoning and intelligence in an effort to beat me at an argument wherein i am stating my opinion. And since i am stating my opinion on the matter, you should realize that no amount of words you throw at me will detour it, because i am not saying my opinion on this topic is a matter of fact and truth, so please, get off your high-horse.

  • 01.07.2013 3:19 PM PDT

**Devil's advocate of the Flood. My posts may or may not represent my personal opinion, I just enjoy disagreeing with people. None of my posts are representative of the official view of the Navy or any government agency.

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Empathy for a loved one is not selfish.

  • 01.07.2013 3:21 PM PDT

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