- last post: 01.01.0001 12:00 AM PDT
1. Repeatedly ask what perra means. (Female dog or -blam!-)
2. Ask repeatedly when the annual field trip to taco bell is
3. Wear your extra large sombrero to class and explain that you’re trying to get into the culture
4. Use the excuse of getting into the Spanish culture to enjoy your taco bell
5. When your Spanish teacher asks what something is in Spanish reply," me no speak Spanish"
6. Repeatedly ask what marrana means? (Slut)
7. Use Negro as often as possible
8. If you have to have Spanish names then keep asking for yours to be Dirty Sanchez until you get it.
9. Constantly sing "Livin La Vida Loca!"
10. Sleep everyday in class until your teacher yells at you then say "This is Spanish right?" and she'll say "Right" Then you reply "Well I'm a lazy Mexican"
11. Every time you walk into the room yell "Viva la mi pene!" (Long live my -blam!-)
12. Constantly head bang to Santana
13. Get a huge taco Bell dog and bring it to class everyday
14. Turn in every assignment in English
15. Constantly flip through your Latino Porno in class
Bonus: Make sure to tell everyone extra loud about Babblefish.com and how it translates for you
16. Hit on your teacher as much as possible say "Maestro es bonita" and "Tu eres gaupa
17. Bring a piñata to class and in the middle of class set it up and have people come in line to take a swing
18. Ask your teacher "El sexo opousto?" (Do you want to have sex?)
19. Bring in Taco Bell for everybody including your teacher
20. Ask el pelo a pene? (Do you have hair on your -blam!-?)
21. Constantly tell your teacher "Te Amo" (I love you)
22. Ask your teacher questions like "Do Mexicans really not bathe and if so is that why they are called dirty Mexicans?"
23. Ask your teacher when the annual field trip to Mexico and Spain is
24. Constantly ask your teacher if she sells any "Mexican goods"
25. Constantly ask, "When will I find my way back to San Jose?"
26. Turn in every assignment with pictures of Jennifer Lopez pasted to it.
27. Dress in the native Spanish clothing, speak only Spanish, change your name to Juan
28. If your teacher dress like people in Mexico ask if she got her clothes at the thrift shop
29. When your teacher isn’t looking, slip in a Ricky martin cd and hit play. Start a Conga line
30. On Cinco de Mayo bring in a huge feast for everyone
31. Leave clues on your teacher’s desk in Spanish on where your homework might be
32. Ask your teacher what a dirty Sanchez is
33. Find food products with Spanish on them then eat them in class when your teacher complains tell her you’re reading the wrapper
34. Constantly ask your teacher why Mexicans like tequila so much
35. Every time your teacher says something in Spanish, repeat it louder (trust me i did this one like twice and my teacher went ape-blam!- on me)
36. If you have a white teacher constantly call her morana (black person)
37. If your teacher won’t give you something, bribe her with pesos or nachos
38. Constantly ask when the viewing of “The 3 Amigos” is
39. Constantly ask to be known as Senor Taco or Senor Nacho
40. When you leave class everyday say “Abrazos y besos” (Hugs and Kisses)
41. Refer to your teacher as “la Madre” (Mother)
42. Answer every question with “Viva la Mexico” (Long live Mexico)
43. Offer everyone in your class (especially girls) mustaches. Tell your teacher it will give the room a more Spanish feel
44. Constantly ask for you and your friend to be known as Cheech and Chong. When granted fight over whose Cheech and whose Chong
45. Constantly sing, “Can you tell me, how to get, to San Fran-Cisco.”
46. Tell your teacher she needs to speak English for you to understand
47. If you have a project or a presentation bring in a Spanish person to do it for you
48. If you get a horrible grade on a test or something and your teacher wants to talk to you just tell her that you don’t speak English
49. Read scenes out of your Spanish Romeo and Juliet book
50. Constantly tell your teacher that your hero is Antonio Bandares and say things like “Antonio wouldn’t have failed me.”
51. Offer to run a review game for an upcoming test, then bring in Taco Bell and tell them that the rules are that you have to say the name of the item to get it
52. Bring in sombreros and cowboy hats for everyone and tell your teacher you’re trying to reenact the Spanish-American war
53. Take the grade book hostage and say you’ll only give it back for 50 pesos
54. Celebrate Taco Bar every time it is Taco Bar by bringing in balloons and sombreros for everyone
55. Get speakers for your portable cd player (there like 10 bucks) then download some Spanish fiesta music with Spanish gibberish on it and blare it during a test