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  • Subject: Spartans In Arms
Subject: Spartans In Arms
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~Update~

Well guys sorry about not getting the chapter up on the weekend I was busy and now its Sunday and the Superbowel's on so yeah i kinda dont have anytime to work on it.

From now on chapters will be posted in the week 2 times each week (or three depending on how i feel)

Go Colts


In America

  • 02.04.2007 3:48 PM PDT
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Stage 1:Good To Be Back
Location:Covenent Crusier
Time:1300 hours

Moving in his sleep Matt awoke with a madening sweat on his forehead. "Aw damn that was just a dream I was ready to kick ass!" Matthew said hopping out of his bed. Knowing it would be only a few hours untill he returned to earth he changed into regular clothing. Matthew took a swig of some alcohol that was on the side of his dresser from last nights's celebration. "Hm tastes a little tangy...probably not the best thing to drink in the morning." Matthew said to himself.

Matthew walked out of his room that he was staying in. He wasn't wearing any sock so the chillness of the cold metal floor quickly engulfed his feet. But the cold didn't bother him so he continuted to the bridge. Elite's and humans alike were on the bridge. Samantha (Matthew's childhood friend) was resting in a nearby chair. Matthew sat next to her and said "Good morning!" "Afternoon" Samantha corrected Matthew. Puzzled by her words he checked his watch "1:30" Matthew simply said.

A shadowy figure steped in front of the two friends and said holding two mugs "Root beer?" Matthew looked up it was Greg his other good friend. "No thanks took a swig of wine when I woke up" "Oh....You want some Sam?" Greg said. "No thanks" Samantha said smiling. Getting up from his chair Matthew said "I'm gunna say hello to Gredome and ask how much longer till we reach Earth" "Ok" Greg and Sam both said. Matthew passed a few working elites an accedently knocked one over saying 'sorry' but still continued to the golden armored elite.

"How are you?" Matthew started. "Good. Did you enjoy your sleep?" Gredome asked. "Comfortable bed you got there!" He said happily.

  • 02.06.2007 3:47 PM PDT
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Stage 1 Cont

"Glad you enjoyed your sleep" Gredome said. "How much longer" "20 second until we arrive your home planet" Gredome said. "Good" Matthew said walked back to his room changing into his Mark VI armor. "Too bad I have to change back I felt a whole lot lighter with the armor" He says to himself. Now that Earth is nearly always battle ready it was required for all UNSC,Spartans or Orbital Drop Shock Troopers [ODSTs] to carry at least on weapon with them at all times.

The cruiser rumbled a bit when entering Earth's atmosphere but soon came to a stop. Matthew put his helmet on air hissed confirming the airlock system check and a sliding of a gear was heard locking the helmet in place. Matthew took a deep breath he hadn't been to Earth in quite a while. His armor wasn't in the best shape since his visit to Aretha. It was scratched on the knees and the shoulders were scratched as well. A portion of the left thigh had lost it's greenish color due to an short circuit frying the shields in that portion of the suit then fire scorching the paint on it.

Of all things tarnished the most Matthew's suit was the one. Matthew stepped out of the room his armor clanging on the cold ground. The cruiser touched down in front of Alpha base. Marines and ODSTs crowded the bases' entrance battle rifles' safety clicked off. The hanger door opened slowly I took by BR55 and rested it on my shoulder. For a brief moment I got the feeling of what Master Chief would do. When the hanger doors finally opened I walked out striding slowly. Marines stood in total awe lowering their weapons instantly.

I walked into the group of Marines and simply said:

"It's good to be back"

[Edited on 2/6/2007]

  • 02.06.2007 4:49 PM PDT
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~Another Update~

Each week Stages will be posted Tuesday and Thursday and/or Friday that should keep your hunger satisfied.

In America

  • 02.06.2007 6:18 PM PDT
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Like Shiv said, man, you're doing well for a thirteen year old, but everybody always needs improvement. Do some simple things, and your writing can go a lot further. Type it on Word first and just go back through and re-read it so you don't miss any glaring punctuality/spelling errors. Use the synonym feature of Word too, it gives writing more meat. You named Matthew too much in the piece. After the first couple of times, its clear who you're talking about. Once you've established the character focus more on his reelationship with his surroundings. And they're about 5 billion ways to say "said", I'm sure you can find a list online. Or just imagine the tone of the characters; angry, dissapointed, excited, etc. Finally, don't be afraid to throw in comma's cause every thing ever written uses commas. THey are essential because without them, you don't have the needed pauses to establish anticipation, breaks btw topics, and so forth.

  • 02.06.2007 6:42 PM PDT
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Oh yeah, I forgot. Nice job, man. Keep it up, I don't have any other fan fiction to read. Oh yeah, outline the story a bit, identfiy the main confict of each chapter just for yourself, and randomly think about how you can make it cooler. But again, nice.

  • 02.06.2007 6:44 PM PDT

Trailer Park Boys ~ One of the best Canadian made comedies ever.

Rather short, but excellent read.

You manage to describe things so well it's like I was there to witness the event. Maybe you should lengthen the chapters a bit. I was just getting into the story, and it ended =(

  • 02.06.2007 7:00 PM PDT
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Thanks you guys for the positive feedback!


Posted by: ReZeNeR
Rather short, but excellent read.

You manage to describe things so well it's like I was there to witness the event. Maybe you should lengthen the chapters a bit. I was just getting into the story, and it ended =(


Dont worry the next Stage should be nice and long and on the interesting side=]

  • 02.07.2007 1:09 AM PDT
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lalalalalala wat thats bull
lol
nice more

  • 02.07.2007 6:05 PM PDT
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Stage Two: It's Over
Location: Alpha Base,New Mombasa
Time:1400 hours

Removing his helmet air hissed out and a gear unlocked. Their in the middle of the crowd Matthew stood smiling proudly. A nearby Marine stood in front of him and started to ask him a few questions. The Marine happened to be a girl with long blonde hair and was holding a M6C side arm. Matthew was slightly taller that the girl she was about up to his neck area. "Hi! I my name's Caitlin! what's your name?" the girl said.

This reminds me of the time my friend told me to say those words on the first day of high school

Matthew hesitated for a minute still in his train of thought. "Matthew" "Are you one of those Spartan IIs?" Caitlin asked. "Yes I am" He replied. "What was it like battling those Brutes?" Matthew smiled at the question "Let's just say they got their ass kicked and was a hell of a long of fun!" "Oh that's interesting" Caitlin beamed. Taking a futher look at Caitlin Matthew noticed she had, blue eyes was about a normal sized person, and look really closely at the M6C he noticed a carving of her name.

"Do I know you?" she questioned. "We just met I don't think so, why don't we go inside and talk my legs are getting tired" he complained. So Caitlin followed Matthew inside the base leading into the leasure room. Matthew removed his armor and placed it on the floor revealing his casual clothing. "Ok, fire away" he said. "So, I hear you have a girlfriend" Caitlin said. Puzzled by such an odd question left Matthew hesitating. "Why do you care?" He finally asked. "It's just..." she started but their was a knock on the door.

"Come in" Matthew said. The door slowly opened it was Sam and she didn't look too happy. "Who is this?" she asked. "Uh this is-" Matthew started trying to rememer the name he wasn't very good at remembering names. "Could I speak to you for a sec?" Sam asked. Matthew's heart skiped a beat he knew what was coming so he desided to take it. He followed Sam outside the door and she shut it behind her.

Again she asked the same question "Who is that?" "That's Caitlin one of my 'friends' " "Don't lie to me" Sam said. "I'm not!" said Matthew raising his voice. Samantha was stunned Matthew had never raised his voice at her any period of her life. "She's just a friend ok?" he said turning to the door. "Matthew" she said. He turned around. A fist socked him right the face sending blood everwhere and causing Matthew to loose his balance. "It's over" Samantha said. Trying to steady himself he managed to spit out "I-I though--" "Save it" Samantha replied holding a hand up.

"You cheated on me for thing?!" "How many times do I have to tell you I did nothing!!" Matthew shouted. "Yeah that's a load of bull -blam!-" Matthew checked his nose it was still bleeding but wasn't broken. Samantha turned around and walked away. Crying. Meanwhile all that Matthew cared about was his nose at the moment he entered the room again.

Caitlin noticed the blood instantly and ran to him. "Oh my god what happened??" "Girl problems she punched me in the face I'm ok" "No your not " Caitlin said taking out a tissue. She dabbed up the blood and threw the blood soaked tissue in the trash. She took out another and gave it to him "You don't remember me do you?" "I don't think so" he said holding his head back hoping the blood would stop flowing. "I met you in 1st grade an Shermon grade school remember?"

Matthew's eyes when wide and dropped the tissue ignoring the pain. "Caitlin? I remember now you liked me but I didn't know until a few years later" "Yes I joined the Corps because the Brutes recently killed my brother fighting the war" Caitlin said solomly. "I'm sorry.." "It's ok" she said coming closer. "Trying to turn me on?" He asked. "Probably" she said. "Well it's working" Matthew said. "Good" she said tackling him to the ground.

Unfortunatly Samantha stayed around and saw the whole this begining to end. When Matthew finally walked out of the room blood staining his white shirt and Caitlin trailing behind him. "So I see you got another one you gunna cheat on her too?" she asked. "Look Sam just drop ok your pissing me off" Matthew said angerly. "Just to let you know I always hated you" she said. "I could of left you for dead on that planet so show a little fu(k!ng desency!" He shouted at her.

That shut her up for good. Samanta stood there like a zombie or a statue of stone completely silent. Matthew walked away from the scene Caitlin following him. "What's wrong" she said looking up at Matthew's frowned face. "Nothing" he said softly. "What about your armor?" she asked. "I won't be needing it for now" "Is Sam gunna still be in your squad?" "Yeah but I don't think I'll be talking to her for quite a while" "I love you" Caitlin said. Matthew didn't respond.

"It's ok I know you do you don't have to answer" she said. They kept on walking down the hall their was a long pause. "I'm hungey lets get some food" Caitlin said. We went to the food court I got a hambuger and some fries and Caitlin got a small salad. Matthew noticed Greg and Kelly (Who he hasn't see in a long while) He sat next to them. "Where's Sam?" Greg asked. Before Matt could answer Caitlin interuppted "This is probably not the best time to talk about this" "Are you-?" "Yes" Caitlin said.

Kelly looked blankly and gave Matt the "How could you?" look he tried to ignore it but the mental image played in his head over and over again. When he had finished eating Matthew went to his room. He turned on the T.V and sat down on his bed. Depressed. Caitlin gave a light knock on the door "Come in" he said faintly.

"Hey.." Caitlin said softly. "Do you want to talk about this?" she asked. "Maybe later" "Ok well I leave you now....I love you" "I love you too" With that Caitlin shut the door. After 15 seconds Matthew thought to himself before drifting to sleep:

Someone's not going to be happy in the morning...

  • 02.08.2007 1:48 PM PDT
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Ouch! This Stage was a rough one anyways brace yourself for next weeks chapter

  • 02.08.2007 3:10 PM PDT
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uh huh y does this seem familiar to me somehow

  • 02.10.2007 3:21 PM PDT
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I can think of 5 good reasons >:)

  • 02.10.2007 10:08 PM PDT
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LOL

  • 02.11.2007 10:58 AM PDT
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Well i hope everyone like that Stage as usual the next 2 (3) chapters will be posted tuesday and thursday

  • 02.11.2007 3:57 PM PDT
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its tuesday i think

  • 02.13.2007 2:24 PM PDT
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Thursday then:)

  • 02.13.2007 4:37 PM PDT
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NONONONONONNONONNOONONOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • 02.14.2007 12:53 PM PDT
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Todays thursday i think

  • 02.15.2007 5:02 PM PDT
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Threw a party next week for sure

  • 02.16.2007 8:29 PM PDT
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WTF!! WERES IS IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

U CANT DO THIS!!

  • 02.20.2007 3:53 PM PDT
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Yeah its here after all the delays enjoy
-------------------------------------------------------------


Stage 3: Wrong or Right
Location: Matthew’s Dorm, Alpha Base
Time: 1200 hours

Matthew opened his eyes to find an object blocking the warm sunlight. He opened his eyes a little more to find himself looking down barrel of a gun. Thankfully the person hadn't seen him opened his eyes so in on quick motion Matt drew a M6D from his bed.
--------------------------------------------------------
Now most Marines refuse to use this gun because of too much recoil and is old tech. But Matt likes to use old technology his own personal M6D pistol had been modified for his own personal use. The slide was reinforced, a leather grip was installed and every aspect of the gun was professionally made. The ammunition was slightly larger than the regular M6C take. The sight system had a laser pointer for even greater precision. This is by far Matthew's most cherished weapon.
--------------------------------------------------------

Matthew flicked the safety off and the laser sparked to life pointed at the attacker's forehead. Matt opened his eyes all the way it was Greg trembling in fear. "What the hell are you doing in my room" "J-J-Just testing your reflexes" Greg stuttered. He managed to grin in a weird way.Matthew flicked the safety off lowering the gun and getting out of bed. "You know, this is my bedroom so..." "Oh" Greg sighed an left the room.

Matt got dressed and wore a black suit with a tie and walked out of the room shoving the gun into a holster inside the jacket. Greg look at him awkwardly "What, I threw something on I wanna look nice" "For who?" Greg asked looking all around himself. "Hey don't hate the player hate the game" "Hate the tailor!" Greg joked. As they walked down the hall every female marine noticed the clothes Matt was wearing an stared at him. Caitlin was in the archives looking for some battle history to read.

Matthew went their first and said hi to her. Kelly was next to her she smiled at him noticing the clothing. "Nice clothes I like them" "Thanks!" Matthew replied smiling. There was a few thing Matthew had to do before he could actually relax so the first stop was Gamma base. He walked out of the archives a dropped into his custom warthog. He revved up the engine an sped off to Gamma.

When he got there he noticed something strange, the base was in lock-down mode. So he parked the warthog in a parking zone and stepped inside the base. Marines surrounded him and asked for I.D. Matt told him he was a Spartan and to lower their weapons. They apologized. “Sorry sir but were in lockdown mode the flood that Doctor Robinson was holding escaped an ripped her apart, she did manage to give on marine the vaccine and locked down her room” “Is she...” “Dead yes but the flood inside her room isn’t” a marine cut in. Matthew reached into his dress coat jacket and flicked the safety off giving everyone the idea of ‘let’s go.’ They proceeded towards the lab with a dozen marines a scientist came up to Matt stopping from entering the room without an injection. He rolled up his sleeve and the scientist injected the vaccine inside him. Suddenly his body began to tremble, his hands were shaking, and then his heart stopped causing him to collapse on the floor. Everyone stared at him to terrified to help him at all. About 3 seconds later his body started to convulse on the floor then finally stopped. Everyone raised their gun at the scientist.

“What did you do to him?!” A marine blurted out. “If you killed him I’m gunna blow your fu(king head off!!” another marine yelled holding up a M90 shotgun. Matthew coughed violently and spit on the floor. “Hang on guys; I’m starting to feel a little bit better” True to his word he got up and picked up his gun he looked at the door which was barred with metal all over. He felt a jolt of strength inside his body and kicked down the door which due to the force; went flying into the room’s wall leaving an indentation. The room was a dark green color with human blood all over the walls. There was a combat flood feasting on a few humans who hadn’t been vaccinated.

Matthew ran inside the room an noticed a loose metal bar hanging from the ceiling he shot the metal holding it together the bar fell into his hands and impaled the flood on it. It screeched in pain letting spores out its mouth. Traveling out of the room infecting the marines outside the room that were, unfortunately reluctant to taking the vaccine. The spores went inside the open wounds of the marines. They screamed in pain but were silenced quickly when they dropped to the floor.

The flood kicked Matt off of it and drew out the rod from its abdomen and threw it away. The metal bar clanged on the ground and rolled next to a nearby wall stopping it. Matthew sprinted forward and slid on a nearby table firing rounds into the flood. It was squealing in total pain from the customized pistol. After reaching the end of the table he got off and saw a fragmentation grenade on the ground he picked it up and slammed the flood to the ground. He pulled the pin and slammed it inside the flood then ran for his life out of the room pressing the lockdown button again on the way out. He dove out the room as the grenade detonated.

When he got out he wasn’t greeted to a warm welcome. There were about 15 combat form floods running around the base. Shotguns blared, M6Cs fired, and grenades detonated anything that could keep them from coming any closer “Sir!” a marine called out to Matt. He turned and saw a shotgun being thrown at him. “Follow me marines we don’t have much time!” Matt shouted over the floods’ screeching. The entrance doors opened it was Caitlin “Matt?” she asked curiously.

At that moment time seemed to slow down. Matt ran for the door seeming like he was in slow motion and grabbed Caitlin in one arm and ran for the warthog. He jumped inside and took one last look at the base marines scrambled for the vehicles but the flood quickly reduced their numbers to zero. Terrified Caitlin screamed “START THE FU(KING CAR!!!” The warthog started up at full power and blazed out of the bases perimeter. Matthew looked in the rear view mirror Caitlin looked as well she gasped as there were 2 full warthogs of flood. “Take the wheel” He said. “What?” Caitlin asked. “Take the wheel!” He repeated. Matt got out of the drivers seat and Caitlin took over. Matt went to the back seat and reached under in pulling out a rocket launcher. He aimed at one of the warthogs and fired. The rocket propelled itself at the enemy warthog and exploding on impact send sparks, rubble, and flames backwards at the other warthog. The flood driver saw it coming and swerved out of the way and sped up to Matt’s warthog.




[Edited on 2/20/2007]

  • 02.20.2007 5:05 PM PDT
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Wrong or Right Cont'd

Matt dropped the rockets into the warthog and took out his pistol. With the right timing he fired three rounds at the flood in turret then dove on the floods’ hog. The flood in turret dropped dead on the ground. He looked at the flood in passenger who fired a round a him. He dodged it the punched through the glass and ripped the flood out. His hand now bleeding caught a plasma grenade out of the air but didn’t prime it yet. He took out his pistol and shot the driver flood in the head causing it to slump on the dashboard.

Its foot was still on the gas so Matt primed the stickie and it stuck to the warthog. He did a back flip and landed on the back of his own warthog. When the grenade detonated it send alive.

Matthew opened the door and started to proceed into the base but his body couldn’t take the extreme change he just went through and shut down. He collapsed on the ground and blacked out. Sending rubble and debris flying. Caitlin and Matt made it to Alpha base in one piece and alive.

Matthew opened the door and started to proceed into the base but his body couldn’t take the extreme change he just went through and shut down. He collapsed on the ground and blacked out.

  • 02.20.2007 5:08 PM PDT
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You said, "He collapsed on the floor and blacked out" twice. :-)

I haven't checked back recently; you're doing a very nice job.

  • 02.20.2007 5:22 PM PDT
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Oh about that I was copy and pasting and i guess i highlighted the wrong part so yeah srry bout that.

And thanks for the complement! I thank you for that!

  • 02.20.2007 5:28 PM PDT