Dear Bungie Unit,
The Halo Universe relies heavily on science fiction. Myth relies on..
myths. Aside from normal interests in science fiction, fantasy, and semi-reasonable scenarios, do you find that you are also surrounded by a wide variety of beliefs? Not to delve into something which would cause you or I mass amounts of suffering, I'm just curious about how active faith (religious or not), the ability to believe, and spirituality is in the Bungie environment.
Have any epic episodes occurred in Bungie offices resulting from different perspectives? Has very bad trouble fallen on any because of their pursuit of personal beliefs? Are crew more often forgiven for redeeming qualities or for redeeming actions?
How often are team members reprimanded for day-dreaming? Are any day-dreams so awesome that the day-dreamer is automatically excused, just for having thought of something so cool?
Lastly, is it very reasonable to think of cheaters the same way that Marv from Sin City feels about hit men?
[The outro was so pleasant, it had to be purged to save time]
Bungie is indeed a spiritual place. Full of spiritual and occasionally religious fellows, Quare and Other and meek and mild. But in the midst of a shared passion, this art they make, their religious differences are like the tiny hooks that give Velcro its vim. They hold people together like duct tape on a scab, and only pain and horror and bloody patches of hair can come from their parting. All of this is irrelevant however, in my solipsistic view. When I sleep, they cease existing, and are reformed upon my waking, with tiny differences that hang on my recall’s veracity. Ergo they cannot be punished for day-dreaming since they are but that within that.
Is Halo 3 going to have the four player mode like in Halo 2?
Dear Robert Shaw,
I have a question for you, Robert Shaw. When she bit into your waist and the blood and tears sprang, could you see into her black, black eyes? Did she see you as she dragged you down to the place where she lives? Was there peace to be had there in the briny depths? I have often wondered.
Arrgh! That store of yours is like wathcing a 50" HDTV for 2 years, then moving house and having to watch a 14" SDTV!
And to think I almost forgot what the old Bungie.net used to look like. Well, if you ever need reminding, go look at the Bungie Store!
Back on track. I was about to buy that Halo Legendary Beer Stein, and a carnage patch, but what's this?! Beer Stein disappeared? Carnage page, I presume, going out of stock as it's in clearance! Shipping $50 to UK!
Something must be done. Put your Monkey strength into this and make that price come down. As much as I want to sip cold, cold beer from a stein with an Alien's skeletal head on it, and sow a patch to some part of my exterior, I refuse to pay 50 bucks to ship it over here. I mean, if you want, i'll ship you over a box and foam and tape, and postage back, and it'll cost me around twenty bucks. Something must be done.
Surely there's a Legendary Stein knocking about somewhere? (Check Max's office, I bet he has a few, while you're there, upturn his desk in a fit of Gorilla rage)
Have fun ruining someone elses work life, and have even more fun shipping that small cardboard box over to the UK.
Watch the Mighty Boosh, you'll find Bollo pretty interesting.
The beer steins are gone. It's my fault. I "tested" them all before shipping them out, and my normal habit of an Oleum float and a Potassium Chloride chaser did the delicate things in. No clue when the Drunkard's Tankard Corporation plans to replenish the supply. Feel free to send me a box full of foam, but you might just as well take a poop in it, set it ablaze and call it a hot girlfriend. It won't change your store purchasing ability. This seems to be a theme. Obviously there’s more profit in, well, profit, than pandering to the whims of readers. I’m on the case. See below.
Is any new halo (3?) merchandise going to be available soon? If so what kind of stuff? Thank you for your time.
My Dear Travis,
I concur! All of my efforts to influence the wearables, comestibles and combustibles in that baby-safe excuse for a boutique have been shot down by witless, unimaginative proles and bureaucrats. If they spent half as much time coming up with ideas as they do stifling mine, our output would increase by orders of magnitude. In case anyone at Barneys, or Toys R Us is listening, here’s some of my projected items, you’re welcome.
· Keggerator with foam covered, stainless steel, parallel handles for easy kegstand. Flip-up footrest spots you for those lonely kegstand moments. Pump action is activated by doing pushups on the handles. Highly dangerous and satisfying. Has Grunty thirst logo adornment to enhance relevance. Do NOT use unattended...if you are some kind of weakling she-man.
- Baby-T-Max. This garment has a short, wide torso, with incredibly long arms. One utilitarian feature is an absorbent bib attachment - which spilled liquid can be sucked economically out of before it evaporates thanks to its high alcohol content. Has some variety of Halo whatever on it.
HOW DARE YOU! mask. A static image of a matronly woman’s face, frozen in a ghastly rictus of righteous indignation. No feasible merch application. So let’s call it viral.
- Life-sized Halo installation, with working superweapon. Apparently it costs too much to ship it to the UK. Pedants!
me and my little cuzin were thinking about making a war game something like halo, if u get this message please write us back,
Grover D and Roger V.
Dear Grover D and Roger V.
I say go for it! It’s fun to make a game and anyone can do it! Here’s what you’ll need:
An accountant, a large capacious property with excellent power and server capacity. An IT department. About 25 digital artists. At least four animators. A small army of producers. Administrative staff. A business development manager. A studio head. A team of programmers. A design staff. A massive testing organization. Contracts. Computers. Debug kits. Significant cash reserves. If you can get this stuff together by next Friday, email me again and I will help you with your shaders.
I recently returned from Studying Abroad in Europe to find my account banned from Halo 2 Matchmaking. During this time my roomate was the primary player on my account, i asked him if he had been cheating on my account and he told me yes. I realize you guys have to scrutinize these games because there are alot of cheaters out there, but i was wondering if my account can be put on some type of suspension instead of a permanant ban? I have never cheated as you can see, that account is almost a year old with 4000+ games logged, with no cheating until recent im sure. I will derank the areas he cheated in, or go on probation, or whatever. i would just realy like to be able to play matchmaking again. Thank you for your consideration, and i apoligize for this incident.
I believe you, and feel free to show this heartfelt affidavit to your room mate.
“Dear Brantley’s room mate,
Quite apart from plumbing new depths of pathetic idiocy (cheating in a video game against strangers), you now find yourself in what I assume is an awkward real-life social moment with your former friend. You see, by my accounting, you owe him recompense for the replacement of his Xbox Live account, which is forever associated with your poltroonery. No fee can adequately repair his good reputation, and the stress has already affected his spelling, but I imagine $50 is a good start. Think of it as borrowing and subsequently wrecking his car, only infinitely more stupid and pointless.”
Oh, Brantley – one more thing. Deliberately de-leveling may have unpleasant compounding consequences upon your ban. I really wouldn’t. Prosecute recompense from this dastardly room mate instead.
omg your new website suk !!! sry for the comment but its the true .....whit all respect ---- -----maxime
I’m not sure you’re entirely in command of the English term, ‘respect,’ however, let me counterpoint.
Omg no ur teh suk!! It’s the true!
I don't know if this happens with everyone or not, but I guess it happens with Mozilla at least.
Bug: People can vote an unlimited amount of times on the polls (using Mozilla I believe).
StankFace Botulism Assbuckets McGee